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Discrimination on looks is fairer than on personality

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nessa238
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17 Feb 2013, 7:11 pm

Yuugiri wrote:
It seems less likely that people prefer extroverts, and more likely that they simply have more opportunities than introverts, as they are more outgoing/socialize more.


I find extroverts loud, annoying and very insensitive - they are emotionally very thick skinned!



Tyri0n
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17 Feb 2013, 7:11 pm

nessa238 wrote:
Tyri0n wrote:
Yuugiri wrote:
Tyri0n wrote:
NT's advocate "personality fascism" (I do, too, just in a nicer way). What's the difference? I would rather live in a society that expects me to get plastic surgery than in a society that expects me to be an extrovert.

Strawman. No one's actually specified 'extroversion' as a requisite, or even preferred, quality in their romantic interests. Not even NTs (see IlovemyAspie's post).


Ilovemyaspie likes aspies. This is hardly representative of most NT's, or WP would likely not exist, certainly not this sub-forum. Most high-functioning aspies don't face discrimination because of autistic traits--which they hide--they face discrimination because of introversion that comes with hiding these traits. A few NT's like this. Most don't.


So you want all the loud, obnoxious, judgemental NTs to be your friend?

I certainly don't!


If I knew aspies or NLDers in my area with whom I could be friends (i.e. my own age), I might feel differently. But people like me are scattered all over the world, not concentrated in one place, which sucks.

To be honest, I don't like discrimination on the basis of looks OR personality (at least the superficial aspects of personality). I just hate the idea that many people are horrified at one but think the other is ok. I said "fairer" in the title, not "fair" with respect to appearance discrimination.

I do like cultures that accept introverts, and if that means they are more appearance-oriented, I feel like it's an improvement over what I have to experience in the West, even if it's not ideal.



nessa238
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17 Feb 2013, 7:17 pm

Tyri0n wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
Tyri0n wrote:
Yuugiri wrote:
Tyri0n wrote:
NT's advocate "personality fascism" (I do, too, just in a nicer way). What's the difference? I would rather live in a society that expects me to get plastic surgery than in a society that expects me to be an extrovert.

Strawman. No one's actually specified 'extroversion' as a requisite, or even preferred, quality in their romantic interests. Not even NTs (see IlovemyAspie's post).


Ilovemyaspie likes aspies. This is hardly representative of most NT's, or WP would likely not exist, certainly not this sub-forum. Most high-functioning aspies don't face discrimination because of autistic traits--which they hide--they face discrimination because of introversion that comes with hiding these traits. A few NT's like this. Most don't.


So you want all the loud, obnoxious, judgemental NTs to be your friend?

I certainly don't!


If I knew aspies or NLDers in my area with whom I could be friends (i.e. my own age), I might feel differently. But people like me are scattered all over the world, not concentrated in one place, which sucks.

To be honest, I don't like discrimination on the basis of looks OR personality (at least the superficial aspects of personality). I just hate the idea that many people are horrified at one but think the other is ok.


It all depends on where you stand in my opinion

As a person who isn't overtly attractive and who has had to rely more on my personality to get friends/partners, I'm obviously going to be biased towards people needing good personalities more than looks

If I was very attractive I'd probably have looks higher up my list of requirements in a person

ie I'm biased towards my own advantages, as most people are

People sometimes take the mickey out of my looks just as I'd tend to take the mickey out of a person with a bad personality (not to their face though as I don't like being cruel to people)



Fnord
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17 Feb 2013, 7:23 pm

I knew a guy at uni who acted kind of "swishy"* and effeminate, but because his family once endowed the college, no one bothered him much (other than occasional verbal abuse). I was always civil and polite to him, but never initiated contact. About 10-12 years after graduation, he introduced himself to me as a woman (she had undergone the full transgender treatment). Then she confessed that she'd always had a crush on me and wondered if we could "get together".

She seemed completely devastated after I turned her down, even after I explained that she had never appealed to me as a man or a woman - she just didn't appeal to me as a person at all, and there was no point in even pretending otherwise.

Her response left no doubt in my mind that she thought that all she needed to be attractive to a man was some makeup, high heels, a surgically-sculpted vagina, and a nice silicone-enhanced rack in a low-cut dress. You'd think that the psych screening would have caught all of that, but it didn't.

(She looked okay, but something just didn't seem right.)

My point is that there are some people who actually believe that physical appearance is all that matters; but behavior matters too - even the subliminal kind - and if my instinct/intuition tells me that there is something not-quite-right about someone, then I'm not going to want to "get together" with them, even socially, no matter how "hot" they may appear.

(*I mean no offense by this to anyone, but it's the best way to describe his behavior as a youth, and I apologize for any offense this word may give.)