New aspie "dating" site

Post Reply New Topic

i would like an autism dating site.

I joined yesterday. I think it has potential if enough people joined it. I like how you can upload pictures and videos, make events, start groups. The forum really needs expanding.

I would like an Aspie dating site too, though G-d knows why.

I think the whole site could use some work. It might be a good site but I got the impression that someone just created that site using some kind of template and then left it there.

I would be for a new website, but it will suffer the same problem as all the other sites will: more men than women than on this planet, and in certain states the demographics would be virtually nonexistent. Wrong planet is mainly for discussion and advice and should be just that. Your website should exclusively serve two purposes: dating and socializing. This site does the discussion and information bit and enough topics are coming in every day. Aspie Affection sucks because it is poorly built with a sh***y website host server to boot. Maybe a site like Yuku or Go Daddy might be good if you want to use a 3rd party host or follow wrong planet example and build and improve on that. Talk to this Alex fellow

There are several things you'll may have to consider: Bot, Sex chat scammers who bait and switch are a HUGE problem on these dating sites autistic or not. You might suddenly find the website full of fake profiles and scammers with fake pictures and info flooding the system so much it would render it useless like the others, The old "type in the letters you see on the screen" only keeps out bot programs that essentially do the profile creation automatically but there are enough assfaces on this earth who dedicate their time and waste of space annoying the rest of humanity.
Match.com&E harmony seem to do pretty well because they advertise on television and probably have a dedicated staff who keep it clean. You are going to have to do some serious research on creating a website with good search capabilities and knowing how to essentially keep it free of bots , spammers and weirdos. Maybe consult tomshardware.com or find IT person who could either teach or direct you to literature on how to accomplish all this.
I think it is fair to say if you want to build a quality site from scratch with a dedicated server and want to avoid all the pitfalls, it is going to take ALOT of work and time but hey you might learn something and get the skills to get a job without paying for college.



PS. This Alex fellow could do the Public Relation Advertising, getting the word out is very key as well.

Really good advices but I got to be a bit off topic: are there any way to contact Alex? I am sure many have contacted him about similar things.

It looks like facebook may still be the best bet. Aspie based pages are growing like crazy on there. A 21 yr old UK man started an Asperger's Awareness page within the last year that already has 50,000 fans. You can always create a second profile under an assumed name to keep your relatives or others out of it. The admins are good about removing spammers and "trolls". This is the newest dating page and is set to "closed" so it won't show up on your newsfeed and non-members can't read the posts. https://www.facebook.com/groups/aspiedatingtips/

Yes, but if you use the same photos of yourself that you do on your regular FB page, people can do a reverse search on Google images and find your main FB account.


Another "yes, but" In "closed" groups, only members can see the posts but anyone on FB can see who's a member.

A "secret" group would be better. "Only members see the group, who's in it and what members post." If someone made a secret group and posted it in the Members Only Discussion forum here, that might work. At least it might keep identities as safe as possible. Keeping in mind that privacy online is a very tenuous thing.

If I joined a FB Aspie group, I'd much rather join as myself. But I haven't disclosed to family and friends and would prefer it to stay that way. But if it were a secret group, I might take the chance.

Any new site is going to have the problem of not having enough users to get more users. Obviously new sites do get off the ground, so it's not an impossible barrier, but it is a difficult one.

I'm sure Aspie Affection would work if only it was integrated with WP. When you can view 100 (or 1000) posts by a person it tells you so much more about them than just a profile. It wouldn't even be that hard to do - just links from WP profiles to AA ones and back. But since neither site is being maintained that isn't going to happen.

Users could kind of do that themselves by putting links in their signatures, like I'm going to do in this post. Those links (unlike my link ) could point to a profile elsewhere (which might be the Eligible Odd-bods thread or whatever). I've never seen anyone do that, though. Perhaps it would come across as a bit "desperate" to advertise in every post you make that you're looking for a partner? If it was part of the member profile then I think it would be perceived differently.

You should make one that is very strict about sexism and sexual harassment, both on site and off, which could potentially lead to a near-even gender ratio on the site.

I am afraid there is not much that can be done about off site sexism. It is hard to prove. The on-site sexism is something I have to think about, hard to watch without spying moderators. It is definitely good advices, I will consider this.

The downside is, that none on facebook would be able to see that site then. And facebook have "a bit" more members than this one

Last edited by AlienCat on 22 Jul 2013, 12:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.

True, but most of Facebook's members are NT. If the link to the secret group were posted in the Members Only discussion forum, I think most Aspies here would check that out. You could even post the link to the Members Only post in the Love and Dating forum. Any non-members who tried to check it out couldn't access the link.

It's too bad FB doesn't have a type of group where it shows up in searches but who's in the group isn't visible until you join.

I wonder what percentage of Wrong Planet haven't disclosed to any one, what % have only disclosed to close family and friends and what % are fully out?

Facebook seem actually the best bet for doing this. Perhaps you just have to dare show to people that you are non-NT (I prefer that instead of having a disorder) and that you are dating IOR searching for friends and contacts. For me, telling everyone that I am dating and doing it online using facebook is the biggest issue, it feels that I am not a real person if I do that (eg. "real man").

A lot of men are doing that, though. It probably helps to tell people, as they might go on the lookout for women for you.

I like the idea of going through Facebook, provided it's as myself, because then anyone who sees you on there can go on your wall and see your pics, you public posts, etc. and then decide if they want to contact you via the group. I think in dating sites everyone is putting on and saying stuff geared to getting the most responses. On Facebook, for better or worse, I'm myself.

What I don't like about going through Facebook, as I've said before, that I'd be "outing" myself. Probably most of my friends wouldn't notice, but when you join something, FB puts on some of your friends' walls that you've joined such-and-such group. I wish there was a way to disable that. I have people friended there that I work with.