hurtloam wrote:
Fnord wrote:
buffinator wrote:
the biggest impediment to having a successful social life is being concerned with some arbitrary bar of "success" in your social life. People are attracted to people who make them feel good. If you stress out about not having a girlfriend or enough friends you will shoot yourself in the foot every time.
This, for the win!
The more a person obsesses about being "popular", the more likely they are to sabotage their social lives. Also, the more anxious a person is about getting a relationship going, the less likely they are to even start one.
These are not hard-and-fast rules, but they do seem to prevail.
Its tricky getting the balance. Look too disinterested and no one knows you want to date them.
that is true, but part of being a "date" is sexualizing the experience. Make jokes about sex, innuendo (in-YOUR-endo). The goal is to make the convo fun and lighthearted while also making the other person ridiculously horny and want to tear your clothes off if not for social customs. A lot of what "love" starts off as is the byproduct of repressed lust. Eventually that solidifies into it's own thing.
Not all "sexualization" is about sex, for example. Playing guitar makes girls who like guitar players horny, artist's painting etc, bodybuilder's bodies and the feats they accomplish with them. Having a talent or skill to show off is exponentially better than just 1v1 sexy talk in the early stages. Why? because she can brag about those kind of talents more freely and receive positive feedback loops from friends. On the other hand that joke that your dick is big but not so big it's going to rise out of the ocean and destroy half of Singapore (cockzilla), is not necessarily something she can repeat to her friends. (no matter how clever it is).
... please dont ask.
I totally disagree with you. I'm not a teenager. I don't want to a date with a man making childish cock jokes. I would think he was an inane, immature moron. Flirting is more subtle than that.
01 Jan 2014, 5:53 pm
