any women here who have never dated, never had a boyfriend?

Post Reply New Topic

^ well that goes a little further than what i was talking about, but... yes

viewtopic.php?t=324318&p=7227555#p7227555
viewtopic.php?t=324318&p=7227555#p7253218

Huh, for some reason I thought this was in Women's Discussion. Oh well, it's very very late here and I'm barely awake.

That kinda reminds me....

^ that show was great. i used to watch it when i was little, it actually made me think about a lot of things

and of course, it was funny



memory lane

sorry op, i can't resist



i was educated by tv

Back to the topic, there's only 3 adult female users whom I am aware that they never had a bf or any form of relationship before: Chronos, hurtloam and slw.
Androbot also says she never had a serious relationship before too, but only a bad fwb.

I don't count the teens.

Are there any others? I don't frequent the Women forum (only when it's related to men or sometimes by mistake when I click on the listed last threads).

From an admittedly small circle, the only person I know who has never had a relationship or such is a woman in her mid thirties.



Quite. Statistics are not destiny, and nor are Darwinesque Just-So stories. There are particular problems and possible solutions, and fatalistic attitudes are only going to be self-fulfilling.



Are they, though? Granted, again, it's hardly a statistically sound sample because of the circles I've moved through, but the only actually existing ladykillers I can think of have been average-looking-at-best proles. And the women weren't/aren't exactly slouches, either.

British proles: at it like rabbits. Sometimes the Daily Mail moral panics, though still BS, have a factual basis. As Jarvis sang:

You'll never live like common people
You'll never do what common people do
You'll never fail like common people
You'll never watch your life slide out of view,
And dance and drink and screw
Because there's nothing else to do

I know one woman who fits the description.
She is a very shy private person so Ive never discussed this with her, but I think her general/social anxieties, the fear of rejection and breaking social conventions has kept her single.
I know she has had crushes, and maybe a date or two but for her I don't think it's ever gone beyond shyly showing interest.

At what age does one have to be before "oh, they're just young, it's natural to not have been on dates" becomes "what the hell is wrong with this idiot"? At what age does it become apparent that the person is only going to get worse, not better?

I'd argue it's around the mid-teens, 16-17 years old. That's just my personal observation, though.

Unless you meant for that question to be rhetorical, in which case... Well, I obviously can't answer.

It can be quite late depending on whom you ask. For instance, my parents told me I was still too young to date at 22—I don't want to imagine how old they expected me to get before I could legitimately begin to worry, to the point of maybe, just maybe, doing something about it at all.

Age 25.

Just my opinion, and in my anecdotal experiences plenty of young adults 18-25 have never had a relationship but may get one eventually, but it's also backed-up by statistical evidence, too.

http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nhsr/nhsr036.pdf (page 17 and 18)

Each and every year starting at about 15/16, the virginity and 'never had sexual contact' rates decrease.

The decrease is initially not too bad from about 15-25, but after this point the virginity rate decreases significantly faster.

For instance, about 50% of males 15-17 were virgins, and ~24% at age 18-19. 20-24 = 14%

But 25-29? Male virgins are already only the 3.8%! !

These are U.S. statistics, but I've checked the Aussie version and the numbers aren't all that different here, either (http://sexcensus.swingersaustralia.com. ... -13-14.pdf).

35% lost their virginity at 16, compared to 0.8% at 25. The 'sharp decrease' happens at 18-20, so while 14% lost their virginity at 18, there's an entire 10% decrease by age 20 (I'll let you do the math).

Also, holy sh*t!

I knew Australia seems to have a high rate of Gay and Bisexual people, especially lesbian women or bisexuals that don't seem to like men anyway despite identifying as bi, who I keep having the misfortune of encountering (I've crushed on a few lesbians only to obviously be hurt I can't be with her, the fact the one lesbian who directly rejected me handled it poorly and the rest I've met have had aggressive and outright repulsive attitudes towards men even when they're treating her as neutrally and non-sexually as everyone else has only jaded and embittered me against them).

Only 75% of people in the Aussie statistics reported as Heterosexual!!

20 and over.

Your statistics don't take individual cases into account though.

If your social life is literally dead by the end of your teens, with your social skills and ability to connect with people consistently going downhill for years, is it truly unreasonable to suspect that something might be just a little bit amiss, even if only in the very early 20's?

How many of those guys still virgins between 20-25 have social anxiety? Autism? Just plain ugly? How many are proper functioning people who simply haven't met the right person yet? Or have been focusing on other aspects of their lives?

The statistics don't really prove anything.

Might be totally off base...
I've seen a lot of scientific research stating more women (girls) tend to fly under the 'neuro-atypical' radar, and go undiagnosed or are diagnosed at a later age than their male counterparts.
Not sure if this somehow correlates to the assertion that women have 'it easier' re. relationships.

Personal experience: relationships are great in the beginning, but too exhausting in the end. People tend to pretend they understand the need to unwind and be alone at times, but in general they just hope I'll 'turn normal' eventually, and expect me to act like a NT around them (despite me practically handing him a manual for my peculiarities - verbally, not in actual print form ).