How can I ask a girl out in a public place?

Page 3 of 7 [ 100 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7  Next

RetroGamer87
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,160
Location: Adelaide, Australia

01 Mar 2017, 7:58 am

rdos wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
Dating sites are getting to be a drag. In some ways they ruin the mystery and in some ways they just don't work.

My goal is to get a date without the aide of a computer. How can I do this? How did you do this?


You don't ask them out, you flirt with them. If they are interested, they will do it more than once, and then you have something to build on.

And yes, it works. If you do it right. Which means you shouldn't mix NT-preferences (dating and asking out) with ND preferences (flirting at a distance and slowly get to know somebody from a distance).


When/Where should I flirt?
How should I flirt?
Which should flirt first, me or the girl?


_________________
The days are long, but the years are short


RetroGamer87
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,160
Location: Adelaide, Australia

01 Mar 2017, 8:01 am

Also what are you two arguing about?


_________________
The days are long, but the years are short


kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

01 Mar 2017, 8:19 am

Really, the best way to meet girls is to go to places where people share common interests. Talk to the girl about the subject at hand (maybe classical music? Maybe heavy-metal music?). Seek commonality with her. If commonality exists, ask for a date. If she says "yes," go on the date.

Perhaps seek to hold her hand on the date. Perhaps seek to kiss her when you take her home.

Flirt, basically, by talking with her. Maybe bring up the subject of sex in general if you sense a connection. Never talk about "the dating scene" or gender differences.



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

01 Mar 2017, 8:29 am

Or just do like Richie Cunningham in "Happy Days":

Go into a supermarket and ram your shopping cart (trolley) into a girl's shopping cart.

Then start a conversation.



rdos
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jul 2005
Age: 63
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,096
Location: Sweden

01 Mar 2017, 8:32 am

RetroGamer87 wrote:
When/Where should I flirt?


Everywhere. There is no place this doesn't work. :-)

RetroGamer87 wrote:
How should I flirt?


Look at her quickly, look away, and study in the corner of your eye if she looks back. Repeat.

RetroGamer87 wrote:
Which should flirt first, me or the girl?


Any of you, but from my perspective, it's often the guy that initiates. At least, you can initiate as much as you want, and there is no reason why you would want to wait for girl to do it.



rdos
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jul 2005
Age: 63
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,096
Location: Sweden

01 Mar 2017, 8:39 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
Or just do like Richie Cunningham in "Happy Days":

Go into a supermarket and ram your shopping cart (trolley) into a girl's shopping cart.

Then start a conversation.


Sure, that's the NT variant. Or do it the crude way: Catcall her. :-)



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

01 Mar 2017, 8:55 am

LOL...You know that I was kidding, right?



rdos
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jul 2005
Age: 63
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,096
Location: Sweden

01 Mar 2017, 9:03 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
LOL...You know that I was kidding, right?


Of course. :wink:

Still, catcalling IS the natural way NT males try to make contact with females. It's just that it has been turned into something bad because our culture thinks dating is more proper.



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

01 Mar 2017, 9:05 am

Most men I know don't catcall. It is seen as being exceedingly classless, associated with the "lowest classes."

Or as something very adolescent.



rdos
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jul 2005
Age: 63
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,096
Location: Sweden

01 Mar 2017, 9:10 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
Most men I know don't catcall. It is seen as being exceedingly classless, associated with the "lowest classes."


Of course, that is part of the rhetoric to make males stop doing it. It works because catcalling is an opportunistic activity, and when the odds of it not working is high, people will not do it. Doesn't mean it is not the natural courtship of NTs though.



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

01 Mar 2017, 9:11 am

Most women really find catcalling irritating. Except maybe when they're drunk in a bar or something LOL



The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 43
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,459
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

01 Mar 2017, 9:16 am

Ahhh...Rdos' Evo-psychology catcalling theories.....

//Bowel movement sounds.

Sorry, something bad is moving below.



rdos
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jul 2005
Age: 63
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,096
Location: Sweden

01 Mar 2017, 9:23 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Ahhh...Rdos' Evo-psychology catcalling theories.....

//Bowel movement sounds.

Sorry, something bad is moving below.


I think it is more than just theories. NT men are more likely to catcall, and ND women are far more likely to find it disgusting and improper. We would not see those connections if there isn't an evolutionary background to it. Besides, given the attitude towards catcalling, we should see no male at all doing it, but it still happens frequently, which again, points to an inherited basis.

Also, catcalling exists in less obvious variants, like loud guy gangs making their presence heard to attract the attention of females.



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

01 Mar 2017, 9:41 am

After adolescence, most women think of these "loud guy groups" as being groups of idiots. They don't bother with them.



rdos
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jul 2005
Age: 63
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,096
Location: Sweden

01 Mar 2017, 9:59 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
After adolescence, most women think of these "loud guy groups" as being groups of idiots. They don't bother with them.


As I already claimed, our culture wants us to believe that catcalling and being loud is idiotic behavior. However, a few NT women still think it is ok, and especially if they like the guy(s). So, the cultural pressure is not fully functional because guys still do it (and not only as teenagers), and girls still think it is ok (and those are not only teenagers either). In fact, when I researched it, the average age of male catcallers was in the 20s, not in the teens.



The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 43
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,459
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

01 Mar 2017, 10:53 am

Catcalling is only ok for cats.