It's so hard to imagine not being alone

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sly279
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23 Jun 2017, 10:30 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Facebook was never a useful venue for dating purposes in my case, I dunno why.

No chat originated on facebook ever led to a date.

I thought messaging women one doesn't know on Facebook is a big no no. Isn't Facebook just for people who are friends in in person to keep in touch?

cberg
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23 Jun 2017, 11:05 pm

It's more about selling people downriver into the mouths of advertisers & the rest of Wall St. As a result, messaging just about anybody on Facebook gets construed that way. I keep to SMS & calling as much as I can.

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The_Face_of_Boo
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24 Jun 2017, 1:24 am

sly279 wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Facebook was never a useful venue for dating purposes in my case, I dunno why.

No chat originated on facebook ever led to a date.

I thought messaging women one doesn't know on Facebook is a big no no. Isn't Facebook just for people who are friends in in person to keep in touch?

I was refering to new people you met and added you (or you added them). Or you exchanged your "fb contact" with them.

cberg
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24 Jun 2017, 1:31 am

My Twitter account points towards my reputation preceding me. :lol:

Go find it & I'll teach you random hacker know-how. Or skip that domain of the panopticon & I'll just do my same thing over here.

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24 Jun 2017, 3:37 am

white_as_snow wrote:

hurtloam wrote:

It just seems like such a huge chasm between reality as it is now and ever being with someone. When I like someone and I see them going about their daily life, see their posts on facebook, I feel like they are so far removed from me that there's no way to cross the gap.

It just seems impossible.

Nothing ever happens, nothing ever will.

stop being shallow, then you will get a bf

Lol, I don't want to "get a boyfriend". I want an emotional and spiritual connection with someone. If anything the problem is that I'm too deep. I enjoy the lyrics not just the rhythm.

The_Face_of_Boo
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24 Jun 2017, 12:08 pm

cberg wrote:

I haven't really seen any shallow posts in here, we should have more comic relief.

Neither I, it was uncalled for.

cberg
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24 Jun 2017, 12:26 pm

Wait a minute, we've all got emotions's, spirituality, someone(s) (somewhere), we shouldn't deride ourselves for thinking TOO MUCH of them! Seriously, how awesome is knowing people who can understand all this?

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24 Jun 2017, 5:06 pm

cberg wrote:

I'm in two minds about this. On one hand it's wonderful to find a kindred spirit and to share things that connect you and find and introduce each other to new things, but...
It would be alot easier to be normal.

fifasy
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24 Jun 2017, 5:29 pm

When you get to know a man have you ever touched him?

Put your hand on his arm tenderly?

Given him a quick hug and laughed when he told a joke or did something you thought was endearing?

These are things women have done to me to flirt or show interest.

That kind of thing could help. Touch can make a conversation a lot closer than mere words.

cberg
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24 Jun 2017, 9:09 pm

hurtloam wrote:

cberg wrote:

Big weird detailed happenings are normal enough as far as I'm concerned.

OpalWP
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24 Jun 2017, 9:52 pm

hurtloam wrote:

I have 'obstacles' to go through too, to have a relationship.

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24 Jun 2017, 9:57 pm

RetroGamer87 wrote:

Yes, once he gets to know you, there is a significant chance he'll reject you. That is always a real possibility.

If he rejects you, you lose nothing. You end up alone just as you are now.
If perchance he doesn't reject you, you gain much. You gain a better life.

Think of it like Pascal's wager. You gain very little of you lose and very much if you win.

That's good

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RetroGamer87
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25 Jun 2017, 1:27 am

So have you asked him out yet?

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cberg
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25 Jun 2017, 3:37 am

hurtloam wrote:

cberg wrote:

I'm not aware of any rules against enjoying abnormal things among 'normal' folk.

...Those weirdos.

hurtloam
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25 Jun 2017, 5:23 pm

RetroGamer87 wrote:

So have you asked him out yet?

No. I keep thinking about the serious things and putting myself off, like how do you tell someone who feels so right that you don't want kids? What if they do? Stuff like that.

I don't know why I'm feeling so serious about this.

I keep thinking I'll let him make the move, then it's not so much on my head when we find we're not compatible.

I don't want to get hurt again.

edit - what I mean is I don't want to hurt him

RetroGamer87
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25 Jun 2017, 5:50 pm

hurtloam wrote:

RetroGamer87 wrote:

So have you asked him out yet?

I've met tons of guys who don't want kids. A lot of guys aren't born with the maternal instinct.He might be one of those guys.

There's a chance he wants kids and chance doesn't. At the moment you don't know. It's a bad idea to just assume he wants kids.

My psychologist says a lot of my negative thinking is bases on my assumptions rather than stuff I actually know. You don't know he wants kids.

The same for other lifestyle differences you may be worried about. You won't find out if he's compatible with you until you date him. If he's right for you, you could be very happy with him.

The longer you wait for your future, the shorter it will be.

I known being rejected hurts a lot, I've experienced it my self. But being in love feels good more than being rejected hurts. If there's even a ten percent chance things could work out with you two, you should take that chance

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