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Trying to accept my singlehood

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Marknis
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02 Dec 2017, 6:28 pm

RetroGamer87 wrote:
Marknis wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
I know this is easier said than done but is it possible for you to not compare yourself with people in a relationship.


I think a lot of the feeling of inadequacy result from of guys with girlfriends.

I'm not saying you should fake contentment or pretend you don't feel envy, that wouldn't make you happier, I'm saying you should attempt to genuinely not compare yourself with other people.

I know this is very difficult to achieve because I'm trying to achieve this goal myself and it takes a lot of effort but I think the benefits may be worth it.

Just remember that when other guys have girlfriends or are more successful in other ways, there is always an element of chance involved.


I constantly see other guys with girlfriends as well as get told by them that they have a fiancée and are about to get married. When I see and hear those things while I haven't even been able to get a date this entire year, I feel like my face has been kicked in.

My point exactly. Comparing yourself to those guys is harmful.


I wish the pain would kill me already.



kraftiekortie
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02 Dec 2017, 6:35 pm

Where did I say that you should "pretend to be happy?"

No. I don't advocate that.

But I advocate gaining perspective.

I learned that I had to gain perspective the hard way.



Marknis
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02 Dec 2017, 7:06 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Where did I say that you should "pretend to be happy?"

No. I don't advocate that.

But I advocate gaining perspective.

I learned that I had to gain perspective the hard way.


I was never given a healthy perspective. I was constantly told "It's a man's world so you better act like one!" and that my emotions were nonsense.

I've honestly wanted to leave this forum for a long time now. I've only stayed around in hopes Alliekit would return but she's been gone for so long I don't think I'll ever see her again.



kraftiekortie
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02 Dec 2017, 7:09 pm

Alliekit's been gone quite a while.

She has a boyfriend; I think she's engaged to him.



Marknis
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02 Dec 2017, 7:20 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Alliekit's been gone quite a while.

She has a boyfriend; I think she's engaged to him.


I knew that. I just wanted a friend to be there for me. She even said if I got a girlfriend, she would make a thread about it. It won't ever happen now. :cry:



kraftiekortie
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02 Dec 2017, 7:27 pm

You seem like an okay guy. You can probably make many friends on this Site.



Marknis
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02 Dec 2017, 7:34 pm

I don't think I'll remain here much longer. I feel more pain than hope when I read posts here. The success stories do not inspire encouragement to me. Instead they make me wonder why I can't have the same.



kraftiekortie
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02 Dec 2017, 7:49 pm

But you could have the same......



Marknis
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02 Dec 2017, 8:07 pm

Just what am I missing? I feel like a malfunctioning machine that should be sent to the scrapyard and get torn apart.



kraftiekortie
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02 Dec 2017, 8:24 pm

Everybody is “missing” something.



Marknis
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02 Dec 2017, 11:59 pm

Even when I was a child, I felt empty and out of place. I thought adulthood would give me the answers but it didn't.