09 Nov 2018, 3:24 pm
CockneyRebel
Veteran
Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 51
Gender: Male
Posts: 121,175
Location: In my own little country
10 Nov 2018, 6:22 pm
mohammedwasapedo
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 17 Sep 2018
Gender: Male
Posts: 57
Location: Los Angeles
10 Nov 2018, 11:04 pm
15 Nov 2018, 6:27 am
Prometheus18 wrote:
I think kraftie is right; nobody likes someone who comes off as "desperate".
Now, this is from pure biology: Women want to feel protected. If a guy seems too desperate, it comes off as if he needs to be protected and he can't stand strong alone. On the other hand, if a guy is too desperate, it comes of as "anyone will do" - that makes a woman NOT feel special or unique in any way. It makes the guy look not only desperate but shallow as well. Who would you want to go out with? The person that says,"Please, please, I'll take 'anybody'! or the person that has values and self-worth and will date only the most decent of people. It's a good idea to be choosey about a person's character and their personal hygiene as well. When women see you as choosey, they get the idea that you are confident. Did you ever notice that a lot of jerks get women even if they are crap ugly? Jerks seem confident because deep down inside, they don't care and lack conscience. It comes off as confidence to others but it is really just a lack of conscience. You're NOT a jerk so express true confidence.
15 Nov 2018, 11:53 am
blazingstar wrote:
Marknis wrote:
My siblings lived in the same homes I did when they had girlfriends.
Exactly.
Mark, the reason you are depressed because you don't have a girlfriend is because you think having a girlfriend will solve your problems. It doesn't.
Plus, it doesn't matter why, what matters is that that is the situation you find yourself in. You have had a lot of good suggestions from people on the forum, but you aren't acting on many of them. I thought it was great you changed your avatar so something less pathetic, it looked like you were making some progress with therapy, you had at least one day you felt better. Can we hear more about this?
Which day was that? Do you have the date for it?
blazingstar wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
I have found that losing the impending desire for a partner.....helped me get a partner.
Exactly.
Mark, the reason you are depressed because you don't have a girlfriend is because you think having a girlfriend will solve your problems. It doesn't.
Plus, it doesn't matter why, what matters is that that is the situation you find yourself in. You have had a lot of good suggestions from people on the forum, but you aren't acting on many of them. I thought it was great you changed your avatar so something less pathetic, it looked like you were making some progress with therapy, you had at least one day you felt better. Can we hear more about this?
Which day was that? Do you have the date for it?
I don't keep that close track of your posts.
Do you know what date you changed your avatar? It was right around there.Actually I thought of another trick I use that I don't think I have posted before. I thought of it because I am using it today. I have been feeling rotten with the flu. So the trick is: what can I do today that will make tomorrow
better? My example, I am too sick to actually do any real work, but if I throw in a load of laundry it will not be on the floor tomorrow when I get up. That takes only a few minutes. Or if I load the dishwasher, at least I will have clean dishes to start the day tomorrow. With time, these things build on each other and long term contribute to a better life. So, today I have changed the air conditioning filter (5 minutes), threw in a load of laundry, (10 minutes), took out a load of recyclables (5 minutes.) It's not much, but I will feel much better tomorrow when I don't have to face these things on Saturday morning and feel overwhelmed by all the stuff I have to do.
I really don't remember posting about having a better day unless it was the one where I stood up to the co-supervisor for the second time which wasn't necessarily a 'good' day but I am still glad I stood up for myself.
