Teach51
Veteran
Joined: 28 Jan 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,808
Location: Where angels do not fear to tread.
21 Apr 2019, 7:20 am
21 Apr 2019, 1:29 pm
21 Apr 2019, 2:50 pm
21 Apr 2019, 3:19 pm
21 Apr 2019, 4:03 pm
21 Apr 2019, 4:17 pm
Teach51 wrote:
I think dating is so difficult because we all need to stop thinking about ourselves and focus on another. Face to face, one on one meetings scare us to death because we are opening our hearts, making ourselves vulnerable to attack and allowing someone in to our most secret, guarded place.
For those of us who have suffered rejection and perhaps ridicule in our pasts or present this demands enormous courage, and the optimism and faith that luck can change if we just keep trying. It's literally putting ourselves on the market and saying "this it, want me? Please, please want me."
We expose our jugular to potential attack, but ,sometimes, if we are fortunate, we are suddenly enveloped in an unfamiliar warm feeling, a click, a feeling of comfort and connection, a familiarity, a "togetherness," that feels like home.
The possibility of rejection, or shame, or criticism put us on the defensive and terrifies us, it makes us say "why bother, I am better off alone and then no-one will ever hurt me again. "
So why is dating worth it?
Because....
There is no magic on earth that beats the sucessful union of shared values, humor and the physical, mental and emotional arousal of being with someone that you can bond with on all levels. This is true intimacy.
Our egos and the plastic culture we are perhaps tainted by will always tell us that there is someone hotter round the corner, smarter, sexier, richer.
The secret is to be content with what you have and devote yourselves to each giving your best to the other.
I miss the times when people admired each other for their altruism and character and not for their breast implants, botox, six packs and d...k pics.
Dating was really fun then.
This is an old fashioned lady here putting in my two bits.
Hope you all find love, I really do.
For those of us who have suffered rejection and perhaps ridicule in our pasts or present this demands enormous courage, and the optimism and faith that luck can change if we just keep trying. It's literally putting ourselves on the market and saying "this it, want me? Please, please want me."
We expose our jugular to potential attack, but ,sometimes, if we are fortunate, we are suddenly enveloped in an unfamiliar warm feeling, a click, a feeling of comfort and connection, a familiarity, a "togetherness," that feels like home.
The possibility of rejection, or shame, or criticism put us on the defensive and terrifies us, it makes us say "why bother, I am better off alone and then no-one will ever hurt me again. "
So why is dating worth it?
Because....
There is no magic on earth that beats the sucessful union of shared values, humor and the physical, mental and emotional arousal of being with someone that you can bond with on all levels. This is true intimacy.
Our egos and the plastic culture we are perhaps tainted by will always tell us that there is someone hotter round the corner, smarter, sexier, richer.
The secret is to be content with what you have and devote yourselves to each giving your best to the other.
I miss the times when people admired each other for their altruism and character and not for their breast implants, botox, six packs and d...k pics.
Dating was really fun then.
This is an old fashioned lady here putting in my two bits.
Hope you all find love, I really do.
Thanks. I relate to this a lot.
21 Apr 2019, 4:29 pm
21 Apr 2019, 4:34 pm
21 Apr 2019, 4:36 pm
21 Apr 2019, 4:41 pm
21 Apr 2019, 4:50 pm
21 Apr 2019, 4:52 pm
The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 44
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,664
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
22 Apr 2019, 3:18 am
22 Apr 2019, 3:22 am
22 Apr 2019, 3:33 am
22 Apr 2019, 5:23 am
