Does my Aspie crush have romantic feelings for me?

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kraftiekortie
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23 Feb 2020, 8:16 am

Obviously, when men do that, it’s dead wrong.

I’ve had a couple of women do that same sort of thing to me.

I just moved on.....it’s part of human relations. I attribute it to women thinking I was the “right man,” then finding out I wasn’t.

It’s a matter of women wanting to make sure that they made the right choice with a man.



Last edited by kraftiekortie on 23 Feb 2020, 8:19 am, edited 1 time in total.

Teach51
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23 Feb 2020, 8:18 am

And sometimes it is deliberate and that is very cruel. Women do it too btw.


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kraftiekortie
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23 Feb 2020, 8:21 am

When a man makes a woman feel like she is the “one,” then gets her pregnant, then leaves the woman in the lurch, it’s a criminal thing with me.



Teach51
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23 Feb 2020, 8:23 am

Agreed. This is why we all love you kraftie.


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hurtloam
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23 Feb 2020, 8:24 am

Teach51 wrote:
Well I can't answer that. You see I don't know if the woman imagined the romance or misread the signals or if she was intentionally gaslighted. Perhaps both parties had different intentions and expectations at the onset and were not aware of it?


In this story the OP tells, he did kiss her, that's romantic.

I've heard these stories over and over, I've seen it happen. Guys who strung women along and were too chicken to tell them they had met someone else or weren't really interested in long term.



Teach51
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23 Feb 2020, 8:26 am

Kissing can be purely sexual. People kiss when having casual sex. No romantic intention there.


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kraftiekortie
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23 Feb 2020, 8:35 am

I don’t feel desire for a woman whom I neither like nor respect.

If I dislike a woman, my body doesn’t respond to her.

I wouldn’t want a woman to dig me because I’m some “bad boy.”



Teach51
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23 Feb 2020, 8:39 am

hurtloam wrote:
Teach51 wrote:
Well I can't answer that. You see I don't know if the woman imagined the romance or misread the signals or if she was intentionally gaslighted. Perhaps both parties had different intentions and expectations at the onset and were not aware of it?


In this story the OP tells, he did kiss her, that's romantic.

I've heard these stories over and over, I've seen it happen. Guys who strung women along and were too chicken to tell them they had met someone else or weren't really interested in long term.



Sometimes our yearning for love is so intense that it clouds our judgement, what was meant to be a casual date to pass time pleasantly can be transformed into a tragic love story. Until we hear the guys' side of the story here we cannot pass judgement or know what his intentions were or how he felt. I am just sorry that feelings were hurt.


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hurtloam
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23 Feb 2020, 8:47 am

Teach51 wrote:
Kissing can be purely sexual. People kiss when having casual sex. No romantic intention there.


It's still a romantic signal to the majority of people.



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23 Feb 2020, 8:49 am

Teach51 wrote:
hurtloam wrote:
Teach51 wrote:
Well I can't answer that. You see I don't know if the woman imagined the romance or misread the signals or if she was intentionally gaslighted. Perhaps both parties had different intentions and expectations at the onset and were not aware of it?


In this story the OP tells, he did kiss her, that's romantic.

I've heard these stories over and over, I've seen it happen. Guys who strung women along and were too chicken to tell them they had met someone else or weren't really interested in long term.



Sometimes our yearning for love is so intense that it clouds our judgement, what was meant to be a casual date to pass time pleasantly can be transformed into a tragic love story. Until we hear the guys' side of the story here we cannot pass judgement or know what his intentions were or how he felt. I am just sorry that feelings were hurt.



Casual dating is leading people on if the other party doesn't know it's casual. It's really wrong to hurt people like that. If you ask someone on a date romantic interest is implied. If you see no future with them after the date, bloody leave them alone, don't keep going back and initiate intimacy. What a f****d up world we live in.



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23 Feb 2020, 8:52 am

This is why I've grown to not bother with men, apart from the nice married friends I have. All the single ones do is mess you around. I don't want one anymore. All they do us lead you on. Every single f*****g one of them I've ever had a minimal amount of interest from has messed me about, then settled down happily with someone else.

There's no f*****g point even bothering to try anymore.



Last edited by hurtloam on 23 Feb 2020, 8:59 am, edited 1 time in total.

Teach51
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23 Feb 2020, 8:55 am

Do you think so? I think it is often the initiation of sexual contact, sometimes it stops there sometimes it goes further. It is associated in romantic literature with romance, it's true but I have kissed guys on casual dates and never thought of it as romantic. I think when two people have established mutually that they are in a committed relationship it is romantic. Maybe I've lived too long and seen too much hurtloam :D


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Teach51
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23 Feb 2020, 8:56 am

It is very wrong to play with someones feelings, I fully agree.


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Teach51
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23 Feb 2020, 8:59 am

If some man is lucky enough he will find you hurtloam. Life can be good also.


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hurtloam
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23 Feb 2020, 9:00 am

Teach51 wrote:
If some man is lucky enough he will find you hurtloam. Life can be good also.


Yeah, I don't need anyone. I've got lots of good friends.

But I do not see romance being a part of my life. I'm grieving it, but I'll accept it eventually. Obviously going through anger right now.



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23 Feb 2020, 9:02 am

Teach51 wrote:
Do you think so? I think it is often the initiation of sexual contact, sometimes it stops there sometimes it goes further. It is associated in romantic literature with romance, it's true but I have kissed guys on casual dates and never thought of it as romantic. I think when two people have established mutually that they are in a committed relationship it is romantic. Maybe I've lived too long and seen too much hurtloam :D


I think that's probably my view because I get absolutely no contact at all from men, other than handshakes, hugs hello and hugs goodbye. A kiss would mean something to me. Bit sad eh?