I feel like it's over for Aspie men when it comes to dating

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Joined: 21 Nov 2013
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05 Jun 2020, 5:59 pm

Yes its pointless, Im a highly skilled and highly paid knowledge worker, I am the only one at my company (full of very high functioning people) who is even single. But despite my skill and achievement, if ever I try to ask out a girl, if ever I try to find a date, I am told that I must endlessly justify why I am worthy as a partner. I must endlessly put my time and effort listing why I should deserve to live, why I should deserve to breath, what have I done for others, on and on and on. I can't ever just be treated as a human capable of love. I have to BEG for it. And a truly evil entity never gives you a road to redemptiojn. You are never good enough. You will always be lacking. There will never be any end to the requests to justify your worth.

Fnord
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06 Jun 2020, 10:43 am

Those who are always being turned down for dates need only examine the single most common factor in all of their rejections -- themselves.

Referring to women as "Evil Entities" might also be a clue.

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Wolfram87
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06 Jun 2020, 10:51 am

specialsauce wrote:

I think it's that your hygiene products aren't expensive enough.

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hurtloam
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06 Jun 2020, 11:30 am

The Grand Inquisitor wrote:

Magna wrote:

That might not solve your problem, but you should be able to couch your feelings on the subject for awhile since everyone on the dating scene is in the same boat right now. Everyone.

it'd be easier to put the idea of dating on the backburner for the duration of the pandemic if we felt like our love lives would actually improve after the pandemic, in the same way that it's easier to withstand hunger if you have good reason to believe your next meal isn't far away.

I dunno.

I'm a lot happier now.

Not having to please anyone or be attractive (I haven't even been waxing my eyebrows) has been awesome.

That's just a superficial thing, but mentally, not caring about how I act has been great too. I dress feminine, I gave a passion for flowery patterns. But I feel like my attitudes are too masculine for me to be attractive. I'm too challenging.

In my house, with my pets. No one cares.

I've been doing some voluntary work as well. Helping people who don't have anyone else to sort things out for them during lockdown is very rewarding.

I managed to do some phoning around to sort out a service for a vulnerable person last week and you've no idea how greatfull they are.

That's been a more rewarding experience than any jumping through hoops to please a man and continually failling and never being enough ever was.

The_Face_of_Boo
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06 Jun 2020, 3:21 pm

hurtloam wrote:

The Grand Inquisitor wrote:

Magna wrote:

That might not solve your problem, but you should be able to couch your feelings on the subject for awhile since everyone on the dating scene is in the same boat right now. Everyone.

(I haven't even been waxing my eyebrows)

.

Sam the eagle would love you.

Tim_Tex
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06 Jun 2020, 7:55 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Sexting is booming tho (and boring as ever).

I have been video called by horny gals during the pandemic more than my lifetime before it.

In Lebanon or globally?

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The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Jun 2020, 2:46 am

Tim_Tex wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Sexting is booming tho (and boring as ever).

I have been video called by horny gals during the pandemic more than my lifetime before it.

In Lebanon or globally?

It seems to be globally, but I have no interest in overseas flings.

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09 Jun 2020, 5:42 pm

SecretOpossumCabal wrote:

cberg wrote:

Is it too much to ask not to be proselytized?

Quoting verses isn't the same as proselytizing. There are plenty of proverbs in the bible that can be applied generally, and here is an instance where philosophy is required to prevent aspie males from falling into the trap of nihilism. You can only do that through philosophy since they already perceive the naked reality of this world and philosophy is how they can add meaning to that reality.

Pointing out the paradox that it's only low people that can perceive the truth of this world is one way that aspie males can find meaning, because only that perception can allow them to mend it. The others that work with this world and thrive in this world have no reason to change it. But it's not a good thing to be well adjusted to a sick world, as the old saying goes. Hence a disposable aspie male has a tremendous advantage here in that he is forced to see the truth, that humans are just animals and to become something more than just an animal is a tremendous opportunity. That is why i say that the focus should be on his goals and hobbies, and not women.

Why can't God just give a young aspie male a woman he finds super hot in looks and personality? Seems like he just wants to dodge it.

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09 Jun 2020, 5:47 pm

NorthWind wrote:

kraftiekortie wrote:

I’m 5 inches shorter than you. Where do you get the idea that 5 foot 10 is short?

Probably from his black pill forums.
A while ago we had a guy on WP who insisted he had absolutely no chance to ever get a girlfriend because he was 5'11 and black pill forums told him that any man under 6 feet has no chance. As if women would bring a tape measure to the first date to make sure the man is above 6 feet and not even half an inch below.

Now, rick doesn't seem to be that extreme in his views. Still, anyone who goes out into the real world can see countless of couples where the man is under 6 feet. Internet echo chambers don't care what you see if you go out into the real world.

Have you considered that black pill/whatever he reads have some truth in them?

kraftiekortie
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09 Jun 2020, 7:05 pm

Even most NT’s don’t get that “hot girl.”

The “black pill” thing prevents guys from finding love.

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09 Jun 2020, 7:25 pm

The OP has not posted since June 03, and has not even logged in since June 05.

It may be safe to say that he's given up on this thread, if not the entire website.

kraftiekortie
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09 Jun 2020, 7:41 pm

This Rick guy will be back—If he wasn’t banned.

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09 Jun 2020, 8:18 pm

That's weird, because the forum on my end says he was joined in 2018 and last logged in recently.

Phoenix20
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09 Jun 2020, 9:18 pm

Introverted, socially award and have Aspergers. Those are qualities that you can not change. Some people are undateable. There is nothing you can do about things outside your control.

AnneOleson
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10 Jun 2020, 12:48 am

Fnord wrote:

The OP has not posted since June 03, and has not even logged in since June 05.

It may be safe to say that he's given up on this thread, if not the entire website.

It looks like he last logged in on June 05 2020.

rick42
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10 Jun 2020, 2:46 am

I haven't give up on this Website or even thread,atleast as of yet. Been a bit busy lately.Feel better than before,but still feel depressed. Personally I think that it's over for me far as dating goes.Sometimes there's nothing that can be done to change you situation.I have kept myself in shape,had a decent job for a while,and even tried to improve on social skills,however with no success whatsoever when it comes to females.The only I reasons I can come up with why I struggle with girls are becasue I'm socially awkward,I'm a ethic(a black man to be exact),and I'm considred short(which nowaday seem to anyone under 6 feet).Things I have no control over.As someone who hasn't really convese with women outside of family for over 3 years(unless I had to for strictly work reasons),I feel there's might not be any point of even bothering to covesing with women unless they're family members or if it's for stricty for work reasons.I feel like every woman outside of family dislike me because of who I am as a person,since I never had a positve reinforcement when it comes to women.

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