15 Jan 2021, 10:32 pm
Pepe wrote:
HeroOfHyrule wrote:
Pepe wrote:
HeroOfHyrule wrote:
Pepe wrote:
PhosphorusDecree wrote:
For ages I had a crush on a woman nine years older than me, and nowadays women in their twenties trigger my "Caution: Jailbait" alarm. I guess my window of attractiveness started with a slightly higher than normal upper edge, and is aging up with me.
Women, in their 20s, are gaol-bait?
Could you explain your thinking about this?
Doesn't "jail-bait" mean an underaged girl that someone is sexually attracted to? I think he means that women in their twenties seem way, way too young for him now and it makes him uncomfortable?
Yep.
That is probably it.
I think he needs to work on that, not to take advantage, but to clean out the conditioned crap that society has installed.
Eh, if I was his age I don't know if I'd be attracted to 20 year-old women either. I can see how seeing someone as super young can make you unattracted to them without it necessarily being due to societies expectations. Everyone has preferences.
20 isn't 'super young'.
As someone mentioned, in the 18 hundreds, in Europe, women were married at the age of 17, not that I have done research on this myself.
The concept that a young, beautiful woman is not attractive to older men is pure nonsense.
Most simply don't talk about it.
For the record, I do find beautiful 20 year old women beautiful.
I must be a very odd/bad man.
But would I date them?
No.
BTW, are you aware that it is legal for an 18 year old woman to work in a sex parlour, here in Australia?
Are you also aware that there is no age restriction on the client?
I am not advocating for it.
I am simply telling you the facts.
I am not arguing against the fact it's okay to find 20 year-old women attractive. I was just saying people have preferences and due to preference women in their twenties can certainly be too young for an individual person, it's not always societal pressure that makes people not like certain things and it doesn't sound like that's it in this case.
16 Jan 2021, 5:57 am
Pepe wrote:
KT67 wrote:
I don't think it's shallow for autistic people to prefer NT partners to be younger than ourselves as long as we're talking within the normal adult range.
We learn skills like independence later than they do so it's more of an even match.
We learn skills like independence later than they do so it's more of an even match.
The reason for this is predominantly with the reproduction process in mind.
You really do have a thing about this concept.
I only like women and young men.
If 20 isn't 'super young' then I'm entitled to liking young men 20 yos-22 yos.
It's not like I'm interested in dating anyone & if I do then I tend to seek out women because young men, while beautiful, seem to be a bit immature and boastful and obsessed with proving themselves.
I don't care/notice if someone is 'handsome' or 'ruggedly attractive'. To me that just looks like a regular person.
16 Jan 2021, 6:06 am
16 Jan 2021, 6:18 am
kraftiekortie wrote:
People in their 20's are never "jailbait."
In New York State, 17-year-olds are "jailbait" for people 21 years of age and older.
In New York State, 17-year-olds are "jailbait" for people 21 years of age and older.
I've been told similar in less American language.
Apparently if you're over 25 and fancy someone under 25, you're a 'nonce'.
Nonces are evil people so it causes me a lot of stress to feel like looking at someone in their early 20s and finding them physically attractive would make someone one.
Mind you colloquially some people think everything from fancying 21 yos to watching Cats makes you a nonce.
16 Jan 2021, 7:21 am
16 Jan 2021, 8:20 am
KT67 wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
People in their 20's are never "jailbait."
In New York State, 17-year-olds are "jailbait" for people 21 years of age and older.
In New York State, 17-year-olds are "jailbait" for people 21 years of age and older.
I've been told similar in less American language.
Apparently if you're over 25 and fancy someone under 25, you're a 'nonce'.
Nonces are evil people so it causes me a lot of stress to feel like looking at someone in their early 20s and finding them physically attractive would make someone one.
Mind you colloquially some people think everything from fancying 21 yos to watching Cats makes you a nonce.
As if I weren't already died enough, now I'm a "nonce". Thanks for introducing that word to me.
16 Jan 2021, 9:27 am
HeroOfHyrule wrote:
Pepe wrote:
PhosphorusDecree wrote:
For ages I had a crush on a woman nine years older than me, and nowadays women in their twenties trigger my "Caution: Jailbait" alarm. I guess my window of attractiveness started with a slightly higher than normal upper edge, and is aging up with me.
Women, in their 20s, are gaol-bait?
Could you explain your thinking about this?
Doesn't "jail-bait" mean an underaged girl that someone is sexually attracted to? I think he means that women in their twenties seem way, way too young for him now and it makes him uncomfortable?
Exactly- there's a (metaphorical) alarm that goes off in my head saying "Too young, turn off libido." ....I work at a university, so this at least stops me acting like a complete dick all day at work.
16 Jan 2021, 7:06 pm
The_Face_of_Boo
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16 Jan 2021, 11:20 pm
CockneyRebel
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Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 118,184
Location: In my little Olympic World of peace and love
16 Jan 2021, 11:27 pm
16 Jan 2021, 11:54 pm
PhosphorusDecree wrote:
HeroOfHyrule wrote:
Pepe wrote:
PhosphorusDecree wrote:
For ages I had a crush on a woman nine years older than me, and nowadays women in their twenties trigger my "Caution: Jailbait" alarm. I guess my window of attractiveness started with a slightly higher than normal upper edge, and is aging up with me.
Women, in their 20s, are gaol-bait?
Could you explain your thinking about this?
Doesn't "jail-bait" mean an underaged girl that someone is sexually attracted to? I think he means that women in their twenties seem way, way too young for him now and it makes him uncomfortable?
Exactly- there's a (metaphorical) alarm that goes off in my head saying "Too young, turn off libido." ....I work at a university, so this at least stops me acting like a complete dick all day at work.
I have a different '(metaphorical) alarm'.
Mine came from China* and is set to: "Too young, she finds you repugnant so don't embarrass yourself."
Mine works better than yours, I imagine.
17 Jan 2021, 12:12 am
HeroOfHyrule wrote:
Pepe wrote:
HeroOfHyrule wrote:
Pepe wrote:
HeroOfHyrule wrote:
Pepe wrote:
PhosphorusDecree wrote:
For ages I had a crush on a woman nine years older than me, and nowadays women in their twenties trigger my "Caution: Jailbait" alarm. I guess my window of attractiveness started with a slightly higher than normal upper edge, and is aging up with me.
Women, in their 20s, are gaol-bait?
Could you explain your thinking about this?
Doesn't "jail-bait" mean an underaged girl that someone is sexually attracted to? I think he means that women in their twenties seem way, way too young for him now and it makes him uncomfortable?
Yep.
That is probably it.
I think he needs to work on that, not to take advantage, but to clean out the conditioned crap that society has installed.
Eh, if I was his age I don't know if I'd be attracted to 20 year-old women either. I can see how seeing someone as super young can make you unattracted to them without it necessarily being due to societies expectations. Everyone has preferences.
20 isn't 'super young'.
As someone mentioned, in the 18 hundreds, in Europe, women were married at the age of 17, not that I have done research on this myself.
The concept that a young, beautiful woman is not attractive to older men is pure nonsense.
Most simply don't talk about it.
For the record, I do find beautiful 20 year old women beautiful.
I must be a very odd/bad man.
But would I date them?
No.
BTW, are you aware that it is legal for an 18 year old woman to work in a sex parlour, here in Australia?
Are you also aware that there is no age restriction on the client?
I am not advocating for it.
I am simply telling you the facts.
I am not arguing against the fact it's okay to find 20 year-old women attractive. I was just saying people have preferences and due to preference women in their twenties can certainly be too young for an individual person, it's not always societal pressure that makes people not like certain things and it doesn't sound like that's it in this case.
It is not always social pressure, but it is a huge disincentive for a significantly older person to be interested in a significantly younger partner.
Also, consider:
Generally, but not always, someone who is 20 doesn't know who they are or what they want out of life.
A much older male may be in 'luv' with their youth, rather than the actual person.
There is also the practical age problem.
If the age gap is too great, the relationship may end up with the younger partner becoming a carer.
If the older person has significant assets, that might be adequate compensation.
But ultimately, it is up to each partner to decide what they want out of the relationship, societal expectations be damned.
17 Jan 2021, 12:28 am
KT67 wrote:
Pepe wrote:
KT67 wrote:
I don't think it's shallow for autistic people to prefer NT partners to be younger than ourselves as long as we're talking within the normal adult range.
We learn skills like independence later than they do so it's more of an even match.
We learn skills like independence later than they do so it's more of an even match.
The reason for this is predominantly with the reproduction process in mind.
You really do have a thing about this concept.
I only like women and young men.
As I said, reproduction that is a *predominant* concern, and once again, the context that I am using revolves around evolution.
Evolution 'doesn't mind' some hanky-panky that doesn't produce offspring, but it will 'die' without the 'productive' horizontal polka.
KT67 wrote:
If 20 isn't 'super young' then I'm entitled to liking young men 20 yos-22 yos.
Who says you can't?
KT67 wrote:
It's not like I'm interested in dating anyone & if I do then I tend to seek out women because young men, while beautiful, seem to be a bit immature and boastful and obsessed with proving themselves.
I don't care/notice if someone is 'handsome' or 'ruggedly attractive'. To me that just looks like a regular person.
I don't care/notice if someone is 'handsome' or 'ruggedly attractive'. To me that just looks like a regular person.
Your choice.
I am not arguing.
17 Jan 2021, 12:31 am
XFilesGeek wrote:
I'm fine with men wanted to date 20-something women providing they then don't turn around and get upset at pretty young women wanting to date tall, financial successful men.
Both are equally "shallow."
Both are equally "shallow."
Most relationships are shallow.
19 Jan 2021, 5:31 am
19 Jan 2021, 6:53 am
The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
I think most men have a tendency to be most physically attracted to women in their 20s, or even late teens. Most men get to have the experience of dating young women when they're in their late teens, 20s or maybe even 30s and are thus, for the most part, able to accept and come to terms with no longer being able to attract younger women when they reach a certain age.
In your case, you've entirely missed out on being able to date young women you're attracted to, so instead of having to come to terms with not being able to date young attractive women anymore, you have to reckon with the fact that you may never get to experience what it's like to date a young attractive woman at all in your entire life, which seems like a much harsher reality to be faced with, and one that I, too, fear that I might have to deal with if my situation doesn't change.
I wish I had a good answer for you about how to deal with this situation, but I don't believe there is a good answer. I don't know how you'd make peace with the fact that you never got to date young women you're attracted to either. It's a tough spot to be in, and all I can say is that I'm sorry you have to deal with it.
In your case, you've entirely missed out on being able to date young women you're attracted to, so instead of having to come to terms with not being able to date young attractive women anymore, you have to reckon with the fact that you may never get to experience what it's like to date a young attractive woman at all in your entire life, which seems like a much harsher reality to be faced with, and one that I, too, fear that I might have to deal with if my situation doesn't change.
I wish I had a good answer for you about how to deal with this situation, but I don't believe there is a good answer. I don't know how you'd make peace with the fact that you never got to date young women you're attracted to either. It's a tough spot to be in, and all I can say is that I'm sorry you have to deal with it.
Long time no see.
I thought you deserted us.
