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I fail to understand this girl

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Abangyarudo
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29 Apr 2008, 8:09 pm

weather1man wrote:
Meh, I see plenty of others posting these kind of threads yet everyone says to me, your going to fail while they say to them go for it. I mean what does moving have to do with asking her to a movie for one time? blah


its uncommon to invest permanent feelings in temporary people if a girl was moving to another country I wouldn't set myself up to fall in love with her. It would be counterproductive not saying you'll fail but this girl ain't being straight up with you and even if ya weren't moving ya deserve better then to invest feelings in a person who will not give you back the proper amount. Just my opinion you could suceed but when you move it'll cause the emotional pain to intensify since now you miss that person.



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29 Apr 2008, 8:12 pm

Abangyarudo wrote:
weather1man wrote:
Meh, I see plenty of others posting these kind of threads yet everyone says to me, your going to fail while they say to them go for it. I mean what does moving have to do with asking her to a movie for one time? blah


its uncommon to invest permanent feelings in temporary people if a girl was moving to another country I wouldn't set myself up to fall in love with her. It would be counterproductive not saying you'll fail but this girl ain't being straight up with you and even if ya weren't moving ya deserve better then to invest feelings in a person who will not give you back the proper amount. Just my opinion you could suceed but when you move it'll cause the emotional pain to intensify since now you miss that person.
Well you'd have a point if I liked her in a romantic way. I think she's cute, but I'd rather have her as a friend.


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Abangyarudo
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29 Apr 2008, 8:29 pm

weather1man wrote:
Abangyarudo wrote:
weather1man wrote:
Meh, I see plenty of others posting these kind of threads yet everyone says to me, your going to fail while they say to them go for it. I mean what does moving have to do with asking her to a movie for one time? blah


its uncommon to invest permanent feelings in temporary people if a girl was moving to another country I wouldn't set myself up to fall in love with her. It would be counterproductive not saying you'll fail but this girl ain't being straight up with you and even if ya weren't moving ya deserve better then to invest feelings in a person who will not give you back the proper amount. Just my opinion you could suceed but when you move it'll cause the emotional pain to intensify since now you miss that person.
Well you'd have a point if I liked her in a romantic way. I think she's cute, but I'd rather have her as a friend.


yea but what I'm saying is a relationship of ANY type is impossible if shes not going to be upfront with you. I wouldn't even bother being a friend and if you still love her thats just hurting you. I think let it go completely its like for instance my last ex she wasn't upfront with me in our brief relationship and she all was for being friends. I do not keep friends that can't be upfront and there for me because then its one-sided and no matter the label of the relationship it seems to me that it will be one sided. Now I could be wrong and if you really want to go for it but this is just my take on it.



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29 Apr 2008, 8:47 pm

Abangyarudo wrote:
weather1man wrote:
Abangyarudo wrote:
weather1man wrote:
Meh, I see plenty of others posting these kind of threads yet everyone says to me, your going to fail while they say to them go for it. I mean what does moving have to do with asking her to a movie for one time? blah


its uncommon to invest permanent feelings in temporary people if a girl was moving to another country I wouldn't set myself up to fall in love with her. It would be counterproductive not saying you'll fail but this girl ain't being straight up with you and even if ya weren't moving ya deserve better then to invest feelings in a person who will not give you back the proper amount. Just my opinion you could suceed but when you move it'll cause the emotional pain to intensify since now you miss that person.
Well you'd have a point if I liked her in a romantic way. I think she's cute, but I'd rather have her as a friend.


yea but what I'm saying is a relationship of ANY type is impossible if shes not going to be upfront with you. I wouldn't even bother being a friend and if you still love her thats just hurting you. I think let it go completely its like for instance my last ex she wasn't upfront with me in our brief relationship and she all was for being friends. I do not keep friends that can't be upfront and there for me because then its one-sided and no matter the label of the relationship it seems to me that it will be one sided. Now I could be wrong and if you really want to go for it but this is just my take on it.
Well where was she not upfront with me? Aim? Well, that's not a really big deal to me. Nothing all that important.


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Abangyarudo
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29 Apr 2008, 9:00 pm

weather1man wrote:
Abangyarudo wrote:
weather1man wrote:
Abangyarudo wrote:
weather1man wrote:
Meh, I see plenty of others posting these kind of threads yet everyone says to me, your going to fail while they say to them go for it. I mean what does moving have to do with asking her to a movie for one time? blah


its uncommon to invest permanent feelings in temporary people if a girl was moving to another country I wouldn't set myself up to fall in love with her. It would be counterproductive not saying you'll fail but this girl ain't being straight up with you and even if ya weren't moving ya deserve better then to invest feelings in a person who will not give you back the proper amount. Just my opinion you could suceed but when you move it'll cause the emotional pain to intensify since now you miss that person.
Well you'd have a point if I liked her in a romantic way. I think she's cute, but I'd rather have her as a friend.


yea but what I'm saying is a relationship of ANY type is impossible if shes not going to be upfront with you. I wouldn't even bother being a friend and if you still love her thats just hurting you. I think let it go completely its like for instance my last ex she wasn't upfront with me in our brief relationship and she all was for being friends. I do not keep friends that can't be upfront and there for me because then its one-sided and no matter the label of the relationship it seems to me that it will be one sided. Now I could be wrong and if you really want to go for it but this is just my take on it.
Well where was she not upfront with me? Aim? Well, that's not a really big deal to me. Nothing all that important.


if your comfortable with how you been treated then go for it dude. Worst thing she could say is no.



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30 Apr 2008, 1:02 am

weather1man wrote:
Meh, I see plenty of others posting these kind of threads yet everyone says to me, your going to fail while they say to them go for it. I mean what does moving have to do with asking her to a movie for one time? blah


I didn't say you were going to fail!

I never said you were going to fail, how the hell would I know if you are going to fail?

Merle



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07 May 2008, 11:45 am

I need a little more help on this thread. So I went ahead and asked her to hang out sometime, and she said she'd be interested to. Then I suggested the movies, which she said she wasn't into as she didn't want to sit there in silence, so she suggested coffee, (which we don't have here in hick land), but we could get something to eat I guess... Anyway I asked when and she said she didn't know, due to being so busy so that kinda made me think I failed here. Maybe it was a brush off, maybe she is busy, she said she'd look for a free date or something. I'm just going to have to assume she is being honest with me, since she has been for the most part so far and I'd think she would have had said that she was to busy straight up if she really wasn't interested. So anyway I do not want to come off as the desperate aspie, or worse annoy her and totally turn her off from me. So what should I do? Just wait for her to mention it again- which could be never? Maybe she would have forgot or something, w/e. Or would it be wrong to wait a week or two, and then say hey "monday" is good for me, would you want to go then? I mean I'm busy myself so I couldn't really pick out a date right now, without conflicts. So what do I do, to encourage a friendship, which is what I want so badly.


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D1nk0
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07 May 2008, 12:05 pm

weather1man wrote:
I need a little more help on this thread. So I went ahead and asked her to hang out sometime, and she said she'd be interested to. Then I suggested the movies, which she said she wasn't into as she didn't want to sit there in silence, so she suggested coffee, (which we don't have here in hick land), but we could get something to eat I guess... Anyway I asked when and she said she didn't know, due to being so busy so that kinda made me think I failed here. Maybe it was a brush off, maybe she is busy, she said she'd look for a free date or something. I'm just going to have to assume she is being honest with me, since she has been for the most part so far and I'd think she would have had said that she was to busy straight up if she really wasn't interested. So anyway I do not want to come off as the desperate aspie, or worse annoy her and totally turn her off from me. So what should I do? Just wait for her to mention it again- which could be never? Maybe she would have forgot or something, w/e. Or would it be wrong to wait a week or two, and then say hey "monday" is good for me, would you want to go then? I mean I'm busy myself so I couldn't really pick out a date right now, without conflicts. So what do I do, to encourage a friendship, which is what I want so badly.


I think its time you message her on facebook and be very Direct and blunt: ask her how she REALLY feels about you and keep demanding to know WHY she blocked you on AIM but not on facebook. Point out to her that she's sending mixed messages and that you wanna know EXACTLY whats really going on. If she blows you off and doesnt Answer than next time you see her Blow HER off and dont communicate with her until she gives you some answers :wink: .But really and truly weather1man, when girls send mixed messages its almost a guarantee that they're NOT romantically interested.



weather1man
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07 May 2008, 12:17 pm

D1nk0 wrote:
weather1man wrote:
I need a little more help on this thread. So I went ahead and asked her to hang out sometime, and she said she'd be interested to. Then I suggested the movies, which she said she wasn't into as she didn't want to sit there in silence, so she suggested coffee, (which we don't have here in hick land), but we could get something to eat I guess... Anyway I asked when and she said she didn't know, due to being so busy so that kinda made me think I failed here. Maybe it was a brush off, maybe she is busy, she said she'd look for a free date or something. I'm just going to have to assume she is being honest with me, since she has been for the most part so far and I'd think she would have had said that she was to busy straight up if she really wasn't interested. So anyway I do not want to come off as the desperate aspie, or worse annoy her and totally turn her off from me. So what should I do? Just wait for her to mention it again- which could be never? Maybe she would have forgot or something, w/e. Or would it be wrong to wait a week or two, and then say hey "monday" is good for me, would you want to go then? I mean I'm busy myself so I couldn't really pick out a date right now, without conflicts. So what do I do, to encourage a friendship, which is what I want so badly.


I think its time you message her on facebook and be very Direct and blunt: ask her how she REALLY feels about you and keep demanding to know WHY she blocked you on AIM but not on facebook. Point out to her that she's sending mixed messages and that you wanna know EXACTLY whats really going on. If she blows you off and doesnt Answer than next time you see her Blow HER off and dont communicate with her until she gives you some answers :wink: .But really and truly weather1man, when girls send mixed messages its almost a guarantee that they're NOT romantically interested.


Was that sarcasm? lol At first I thought it was serious, but I think it's a bit of sarcasm in there. I realize that, I just want her as a friend, not a girlfriend.


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D1nk0
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07 May 2008, 12:41 pm

No, it wasnt sarcasm. The fact that you only want her as friend is a most definitely better for you in this case. But maybe the reason for her treating you the way she does is to send you the message that she's not *interested* in you romantically.
She may have misinterpreted your actions to be suggesting to her that you were attracted to her.