Bullying's effects on AS males ability to initiate

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Definately. I think everyone should have a gun locked in the attic, and should know how to use it, just as a patriotic thing. (I don't always live up to my ideals. I've been saying this for decades, but haven't gotten around to it. No passion.)

Btw, you're proving my point nicely -- when I respond and fight back to your obnoxiousness, you back down, but when I'm polite, you attack (you seem to have some personality issues outside of the AS spectrum). Typical bully behavior. Troll much?

Funny also that you're acting tough in the above line, but then scared to tell me even some tiny figment of where you live, not that I asked (you should read carefully, I asked "Why", not "where"). Back it on down, bully!

Others reading this pointless pissing match -- notice the principles at work. Bully attacks, you act nice, he keeps attacking. You fight/bite back, he backs off. Don't give an inch to a bully, he'll make you pay the rest of your life.

Your reverse psychology plan won't work with me , bang your head to some wall.

I fear you because you are apparently a violent person with a gun who may hurts me or hurts my family but your attitude didn't generate any respect from me toward you , in fact I have no respect toward you now.

Encouraging gun and weapon ownership is one of the reason that made my country to venture into 15 years of bloody civil war , which I still remember 5 years of it at least. And it's one of the main reasons why a new civil war might happens anytime again.

IMO, we have enough guns as is....

I remember after those Columbine shootings how scared I was to go to my classes. Even in class I was afraid somebody would shoot through the window. I had gotten to know a few guys who bragged about their little guns and who they'd shoot if they were told on.

I knew one guy arrested for slamming another guy's head onto a pull. There was blood everywhere and the guy he attacked was shaking in covulsions. Now whether or not that guy did something to piss him off, I didn't think it was good enough excuse to do what he did.

The same goes for those guys that did those shootings in Columbine. I kind of think whatever comes around goes around. So it just escalates kind of like gang shootings.

I never fought back physically because I knew I wasn't as strong as some of the girls and yes there were girls that would get into physical fights with eachother and they could got real ugly. Most of the bullying I got was verbal..maybe not physical nevertheless it did hurt and it made it hard for me to fight back.

Last edited by MissConstrue on 04 Feb 2009, 2:28 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I'm 'tough' but NOT SOCIALLY. I am four eleven too.....and it isn't in my temperment to learn to be socially confrontational......however, If I think I'm right and momentarily have 'energy and guts' I don't back down for the sake of someone's 'status'. It is just that the formula is not always there....because I am somewhat socially 'passive' and 'uncomfortable'............If I sense INJUSTICE!! !! that is another story. It emboldens me to KNOW WHAT IS FAIR AND JUST! What doesn't embolden me are social hierarchies or social trivia. I rebel against them and don't respect them.


I am somewhat more of a confident person on the phone, where I am allowed to be a bulldog, because no one sees my size, reads my face or body language....... they only hear my logic and truth....... hahahahahehehehe But really, I'm not a phone person, and unless there is an important issue I'm not on the phone much at all.

Because I've had a life full of difficult circumstances my daughters call me 'tough'.....but I'm not mean....when people see me they think I'm small and fragile on the inside.....and since I'm passive I rarely prove them wrong...but the joke is on their assumption....because on the inside there is a BIG SURPRISE.....they keep their handy little assumptions and treat me like ess h i t........oh, that's Ok.....they don't NEED to know, and I don't NEED them to know.....I don't need to work to convince them of my worth.........the effort isn't worth it to me. Yes, I have noticed that a lot of people's favorite hobby is moment to moment letting everyone know their 'greatness'. I find their pastime entertaining sometimes, irritating at other times. Me to them.......aloof, I guess. But if they think they 'know me' and start to assess me I find that unjust. I keep it to myself. Because they DON'T KNOW ME. I think it is 'small' behavior to tell others 'who they are'.......it is really a technique people use TO MANAGE YOU inside their head.

You sound like a sad and bitter person -- I certainly never started a fight with you, nor insulted you, but now you have just done so to me.

The sad part about this is that most gun control people have it backwards -- by banning people from carrying concealed weapons, you actually make it easier for the Columbines of the world to happen, because you guarantee that the criminals are the only ones around who had guns. Had one teacher at Columbine had a concealed weapon (as has happened in a few other school shootings), someone would have been able to help kill them before they could do any more damage.

This is exactly why you never hear about any mass shootings of people at firing ranges -- everyone else there with a gun would stop them before they could do anything. It's also why the U.S. has a much lower rate of "hot" burglaries (burglaries that happen while the home owner is actually still inside the house, and thus more dangerous) than Britain -- in the U.S. burglars know that they have to worry about being shot, while in Britain, they know that they don't have much to worry about from whoever is inside their house. Both Ozzy Ozbourne and George Harrison were victims of hot burglaries while they were living in England -- nothing like that ever happened to them here in the U.S., when they were living here.

Well, since this thread has already become a trollfest, I won't hold anything back...

Bloody hell... will you drop the f*****g height argument already? You can't just blame every f*****g thing that's wrong with your life on that... Sure, I'm a fatass, but I don't consider that the definitive reason why women won't like me (though I used to)... rather it's just me being a nerdy loser... In your case, being under 1.5 meters isn't the cause of your social problems, the fact that you're an a**hole is...


And you sound like a conceited a**hole from Europe who has a condescending view of anything from the US...


Funny... I had the opposite impression. I always had an inflated view of my self-worth when I was in middle school, which is where most of the bullying took place for me. It was in the beginning of high school where I realized how little I actually meant in the grand scheme of things, and is also the place where bullying ceased within 2 months of getting there...

Also, while I'm at it, I'm sick and tired of your condescending attitude. You constantly go "oh just improve your outlook and everything will be fine and you'll find a girlfriend, etc etc."... Sure, fine, says the a**hole who already has a girlfriend. I'm not one to improve my outlook beyond that which is realistic... To improve one's outlook beyond realism is the definition of hubris. Just because there was someone for you doesn't mean there's someone for everybody... Get in touch with reality, a**hole...

Will you drop that same reaction when I ever mention my height? it's not like I mention it in every post , probably only in 10 to 15 out of 4000+ posts so far.

You mention your weight bloody times , yet I don't go react like that and no one does , and I am free to mention whatever I want.

And oh, I never blamed my height for everything, never.

and yes, I know ...some short men are very socially successful and so some fat men.

Last edited by LePetitPrince on 04 Feb 2009, 5:53 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Back on topic.

I was bullied for a number of reasons. But lack of social skill will generally get you bullied.

So it is a cycle. I have had social phobia because of that cycle, which I managed break out of to get friends, but with romantic not so much.

I believe self confidence is quite subjective. You can have as much as of as you are willing to make yourself believe. Many emotions are delusions anyway and self confidence is no exception. I just got to put that into practice.

But yes the fear of rejection is a learnt thing, the lack of social skill is not, but you can learn to compensate for that.

I am in touch of reality, and that reality is that I'm married (I don't have a GF, though at one point I did have both), have a great life since the point where I stopped being negative and took responsibility for my life, and if you don't like my "condescending" attitude, don't read my posts, but I will write whatever the hell I want, just like how you will drip negativity and "woe is me" over every positive idea anyone has here. And btw, don't fling names, because I never did with you. Up until your last quote, you were bearable, but you can f*ck right off if you're going to start in with insults.

Just because you can't cope with life doesn't mean there aren't other people here who have that potential. You sound like a worst-case example who doesn't even want to help himself, but when I was in that situation, I sure could have used the help. Your reality is so distorted and hopeless that I don't even know why you bother to chime in on these threads, other than to just try to make everyone as miserable as you are. Misery loves company, and you truly are misery. You (and Le Petit) truly are the definition of haters, and just like all haters, you continue to sabotage yourself with your loser attitude and depressive "It's not like that for me, so it can't be for anyone" defeatist f*cking attitude. Please dude, if you really do feel like that, you might need to have yourself committed or something. I think you might actually pose a threat to yourself or others. I certainly don't think you contribute much of anything to this forum for people who are looking for constructive advice.

Honestly dude, this is my impersonation of pretty much every post I've seen from you:
"It's not like that for me"
"Nobody likes me like that"
"Nobody wants me for who I am"
and blah blah blah "my life sux" blah blah

What do you want, sympathy? A cookie? A prozac? A prozac sympathy cookie? Pipe down already. We know you can't win. Fine. Ignore what I say, my advice (if anyone wants it) is usually for anyone but you, because you have made it quite clear that you are a hopeless case, don't want advice, and won't be helped. Good. I don't think you started this thread, so don't let the door hit you on the way out, I was responding originally to the OP of this thread, not your sorry, depressed ass.

So if someone posts here on an advice/love/romance forum looking for help or observations, I'm sure as hell going to offer it, just as you sure as hell are going to piss all over them and mention how whatever it is, life really sucks for you and we should all feel sorry for you. You do your thing, I'll do mine.

IF YOU DONT LIKE WHAT I WRITE, DONT READ ME.

Mountains and molehills, guys?

All right,, look, I apologize for having a bit of a meltdown there and being all inflammatory and what not, but you are about the 12th person to say that "there's someone for everybody" line to me... and all said people who have said that to me are in a relationship of some sort... no single guys say that to me, which is how I deduce that the very statement "someone for everybody" is just a filler statement people who already have someone use as a generic response to placate the lonely singles, hence my claims of condescension...

Not every post I make is like that. Only every post in L&D, and some in the haven...


Actually, yes, I could go for one of those right about now... seeing as how all my friends got partners and I'm still alone... oh yeah, add that line to the above impersonations paragraph...


It's hard to not be defeatist when you've screwed up every chance you've had in life... Back when chances for love actually came my way every now and then, I would invariably fail. One summer back when I was a teenager, I asked this girl out. My rather inflated self-view at the time wouldn't even consider the possibility that she would say no. When she did reject me, I was so crushed that I didn't even speak for two months, and wanted to swear off the possibility of love entirely for years after that...

Then, the summer after high school, I met another woman. Unlike the first one, this one actually seemed to have some passing interest in me (the only time in my life I ever felt something like that). All I had to do was ask her out, and I was paralyzed in fear of a repeat incident. When the theater gig we were both doing ended, she left, and the few times I saw her again, she was much more distant than before, indicating that I, effectively, made the wrong choice.

Which brings us to now. There's one woman near my age that occasionally shows up to choir rehearsals at my church that I took an interest in. I resolved that this time would be different. This time I would actually go for it. I gave her a phone call, and, let me tell you, I have never creeped someone out that much in my life. I could talk about projectile vomit to someone who's eating and creep them out less... Now I'm permanently stuck in the friend zone for that attempt to get closer, and she's the only person anywhere near my age that I'm in anything approaching regular contact with (more than twice a year), so unless another woman my age drops by the church on a semi-regular basis, there's nobody else around to go for...

Needless to say, being 0 for 3, I completely fail at life...

I take the statement "there's someone for everyone" with a grain of salt, it strikes me as obviously false, but there's some substance in what billsmithglendale says that I've taken into account. I think you and LePetitPrince have generally been quite sensible as well, which makes me disappointed to see this sort of mudslinging. Let's pretend this thread didn't happen, shall we?

I'm trying to at least forget it and move on... that was a genuine aspie meltdown on my part (whether you choose to believe that or not... I will stand by it...)

rAmen to that.

Had hope for the thread when I clicked on it, but by and large it's a bully pulpit thus far.


M.