Why is it girls have an easier time getting dates than guys?

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You're not a bad-looking guy. How many women have asked you out? You circulate socially. You go to college.

Except maybe in academic/progressive circles, the old roles remain pretty well entrenched. I don't know any guy who has had a woman ask him out.

Women who are of a wide variety of degrees of "attractiveness" rarely ask men out.

Maybe it's different now--who knows?

Hm, maybe it's just the perfect world that exists in my mind anyways. I circulate socially in the sense that I have two friends that I hang out with, but I'm far removed from any greater social structure or group in college. It's kind of a bummer actually that I lived on the floor that I did even though I met my friends there. It was the only strictly male dorm building on campus, all the rest were co ed besides the one strictly female dorm. I really don't know anyone else besides my brother and now sister here. It's probably true in most places that men do the asking. I've never asked a girl out in the conventional sense, which is why I'm single and I guess I'm okay with that right now, but I did have one girl actually ask me out though back in high school. She was also a fundamental christian type, which would seem like the last kind of person that would. Younger women might be more inclined to try to pursue men, but maybe when women reach adulthood in their early 20's they become more acclimated to traditional gender roles in that area anyways. That's just speculation though and most likely not true all the time if often.

Gender roles, in the sense of dating, is proceeding at a glacial pace.

In some areas, over the past 40 years since the 1970s, there have been astounding changes within a US context.

Where I work, most of the attorneys and judges happen to be women.

Even amongst these people, it's still most common for the guy to ask for dates, rather than vice versa.

I think that women don't do the asking because they think that if the guy liked them enough he would bother his ass to ask them out because it is ok for them to do so, they're allowed to, it's their job.

And on the other hand there's women like me who have asked men out, but the men didn't like that and said no. So you do begin to women if breaking the gender role thing is a good idea. So when the next attractive man comes along you think, Ok, I'd better do this the normal way and send the signals, that doesn't work either.

So I don't know.

This forum is making me more depressed. I guess I'm just too old and too ugly now. I stay alive for the sake of my sister. She's the only person that keeps me going.

If you're going to break the gender-rôle thing, break it entirely and do the same thing a man has to do when he's rejected: suck it up and keep trying.

Ok, I get it. Everyone is afraid to approach everyone else. It's human nature.

To the women here always too shy/nervous to approach in real life - don't you see us males are just as afraid and nervous of approaching as you are?

Fact is, even if everyone, both male and female, feel too nervous to make the first move, someone still has to step-up and do it.

In my experiences it's almost always been the male who steps up. How come?

This isn't about culture or society either,. I'm not talking about that. Maybe it has an influence on things, but I'm talking about motivation and effort.

If two shy people are attracted to one another, if no one does anything,, nothing will happen. But if one person steps-up, which one, in your experiences, do you expect to take the initiative?

So what's your solution other then wait for a guy to ask you out?

This is why I tried online dating. Reality is like he said if neither gender ask the other out then nothing happens. I willing to bet women get asked out way more often then men, FYI not all aspie women struggle to be asked out or rejected like you or men. If their super pretty aspie or not their get lots of men asking them out. There was one who was on dating site and her sister talked to me and told me the girl has lots of men asking her out so my chances were not good. Also lot of the traits aspie women have are highly attractive to men but the reverse isn't true. Being shy and nerdy is cute in women. Being shy and nerdy is suspicious in a guy and a turn off for most women.

Shy isn't confident and as most women say even most aspie women confidence is key and required. Never hear men say confidence is required or is key or is attractive in for women.

Shy woman is cute
Shy guy is lacking confidence and might be a future mass shooter.

I dont know the solution. More and more people are staying single, society as a whole is becoming more distant and antisocial. Seems like if this continues it'll lead to a society breakdown. Populations is already falling into a unsalvageable population decline. All our enemies have to do is wait a few hundred to a thousand years.