18 Apr 2019, 3:11 pm
Yeah, I'm only trying to open the dialog with very close friends. I think I need to come up with some way of encouraging them to ask direct questions instead of letting miscommunications build on each other.
_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos
19 Apr 2019, 12:54 am
Alita wrote:
So much of this is also dependent on culture. In our Western Anglo-Saxon world, small talk and constant smiling seem to be more necessary for the fabric of society to hold together. This is not the case in a lot of other places.
You ever watch those movies where one friend calls up another and begins their call with, "So I was doing [A, B, C] this morning and I thought to myself [X, Y, Z]. Like, what do you think of that?" And their friend just talks to them as if they were in the middle of a conversation. No hello, no what are you doing, just down-to-earth convo. I really don't understand why life can't be like that in reality. What's stopping us?
You ever watch those movies where one friend calls up another and begins their call with, "So I was doing [A, B, C] this morning and I thought to myself [X, Y, Z]. Like, what do you think of that?" And their friend just talks to them as if they were in the middle of a conversation. No hello, no what are you doing, just down-to-earth convo. I really don't understand why life can't be like that in reality. What's stopping us?
I actually will do that with the few people I will communicate online with. I might say hi first but then I tend to just get right in what I'm wanting to talk about. Once upon I time I did this with quite a few people, numbers have dwindled to also not being often at all.
I have noticed that the small talk and smiling stuff seems to be pretty ingrained in the USA. If you don't do those things people tend to say things like "would it kill you to smile?" I also have a friend who is often thought to be angry because she isn't a big on the smiles. I've trained myself a little to pass along smiles here and there as well as some small talk...but ugh it is just a pain. I rather be in silence lol The whole of it has always felt rather superficial and kind of fake too. Like I kind of dobt they REALLY care how I'm doing, it's just a pleasantry. But I can't tell when it it's sincere and when it isn't so how am I to know how I should answer?!
Anyway cberg is trying to talk more with already friends so I would think they would have some familiarity with how he conversationally operates. At least to know how the chit-chat and smile stuff goes.
cberg, what about trying to get everyone to watch a movie about Autism? Or one with ASD characters? Maybe that would help open the door for discussion? Maybe i'd be easier for them to ask questions about the characters vs just them going "hey cberg why do you X?"
19 May 2019, 6:16 pm
Having put some thought into the movie idea, I have no idea how I could introduce the concept without feeling intrusive. I can crack some jokes about it but that's as far as conversation about my screwball brain ever usually goes.
I suppose my friends notice characters like that all over the place, I just don't know though. 
_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos
21 May 2019, 4:15 am
21 May 2019, 4:30 am
21 May 2019, 4:43 am
21 May 2019, 4:54 am
21 May 2019, 7:47 am
21 May 2019, 8:52 am
21 May 2019, 9:01 am
21 May 2019, 9:29 am
21 May 2019, 9:45 am
cberg wrote:
Well a lot of people have been telling me being smart means I'll be avoided by more or less everyone.
[...]
It's almost like being nerdy automatically makes me unattractive.
[...]
It's almost like being nerdy automatically makes me unattractive.
There certainly exist smart/nerdy women who appreciate an intellectual peer. I, for one, have always sought intellectual peers.
21 May 2019, 10:20 am
21 May 2019, 10:38 am
21 May 2019, 10:59 am
21 May 2019, 11:13 am
