AussieMatty
Velociraptor
Joined: 21 Mar 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 404
Location: Townsville, Queensland
12 Jun 2012, 11:13 pm
13 Jun 2012, 1:30 am
The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 44
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,664
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
13 Jun 2012, 1:45 am
yellowtamarin wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Chances that she will reply you are higher if she already viewed your profile than not.
Maybe...certainly not in my case. If I have viewed your profile and not sent you a message, I'm not interested. But yeah I get that girls like the guys to do the chasing and all that.
Also, remember that plenty of people who browse anonymously would have viewed your profile. Don't assume that because they are not listed, they did not look. If people only messaged those who they knew had viewed their profile, I'd never get any messages!
I'm also not saying that it wouldn't mean someone is interested if they viewed you, just that they may or may not, and this is what is getting a lot of guys in a fluster, because they are thinking too much about it, wondering why they aren't getting messages back ("But they clicked on my link!! It doesn't make sense!!"), etc etc. And I would no doubt go down a similar path if I had the visitors feature set up. So I turn it off, and relax. I check out who I want to (for whatever reason, including all those brought up by DogsWithoutHorses and even occasionally the one by JanuaryMan), and message those people that I am interested in.
Most importantly, once I have sent a message, I forget about it. If they reply, that's great! If they don't, I won't even realise.
Quote:
Maybe...certainly not in my case. If I have viewed your profile and not sent you a message, I'm not interested. But yeah I get that girls like the guys to do the chasing and all that.
If he's too sexy for you, you will be interested, maybe you'd get shy to message him and wait from him the first move
Quote:
Also, remember that plenty of people who browse anonymously would have viewed your profile. Don't assume that because they are not listed, they did not look. If people only messaged those who they knew had viewed their profile, I'd never get any messages
!I don't only message those who viewed my profile.
Quote:
'm also not saying that it wouldn't mean someone is interested if they viewed you, just that they may or may not, and this is what is getting a lot of guys in a fluster, because they are thinking too much about it, wondering why they aren't getting messages back ("But they clicked on my link!! It doesn't make sense!!"), etc etc. And I would no doubt go down a similar path if I had the visitors feature set up. So I turn it off, and relax. I check out who I want to (for whatever reason, including all those brought up by DogsWithoutHorses and even occasionally the one by JanuaryMan), and message those people that I am interested in.
Most importantly, once I have sent a message, I forget about it. If they reply, that's great! If they don't, I won't even realise.[
Most importantly, once I have sent a message, I forget about it. If they reply, that's great! If they don't, I won't even realise.[
Ok look, i know it'd be nice if all things were the same for both genders and stuff but....
I am a guy, you are a girl, meaning that the game dynamics are totally different, It's a fact.
You cannot compare yourself to a guy on okcupid, no matter how much you try to find similarities, it's still like comparing apples to oranges.
One main difference, any girl on okcupid would try to decrease her received messages (because they're too many already, hence why a lot of girls disable features like the visiting thing and enable the anonymous visiting) so she can filter them more efficiently, while any guy there would try to increase his received messages (which are far fewer than what a typical girl get there) to increase the probability of finding someone suitable.
I know I am receiving a lot of messages there
but it still far fewer than what most girls receive.
Maybe a guy has to be a celeb there in order to beat an average girl in term of # of messages.
13 Jun 2012, 2:10 am
13 Jun 2012, 2:42 am
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Quote:
Maybe...certainly not in my case. If I have viewed your profile and not sent you a message, I'm not interested. But yeah I get that girls like the guys to do the chasing and all that.
Quote:
If he's too sexy for you, you will be interested, maybe you'd get shy to message him and wait from him the first move
Haha. If he has his top off I most definitely will never message him, or reply to his message, that's for sure!! (But that's a whole different thread.)
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Quote:
Also, remember that plenty of people who browse anonymously would have viewed your profile. Don't assume that because they are not listed, they did not look. If people only messaged those who they knew had viewed their profile, I'd never get any messages!
Quote:
I don't only message those who viewed my profile.
Never said you did. Just putting it out there, in case anyone decides it is a good idea to only contact those who have viewed their profile.
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Quote:
I'm also not saying that it wouldn't mean someone is interested if they viewed you, just that they may or may not, and this is what is getting a lot of guys in a fluster, because they are thinking too much about it, wondering why they aren't getting messages back ("But they clicked on my link!! It doesn't make sense!!"), etc etc. And I would no doubt go down a similar path if I had the visitors feature set up. So I turn it off, and relax. I check out who I want to (for whatever reason, including all those brought up by DogsWithoutHorses and even occasionally the one by JanuaryMan), and message those people that I am interested in.
Most importantly, once I have sent a message, I forget about it. If they reply, that's great! If they don't, I won't even realise
Most importantly, once I have sent a message, I forget about it. If they reply, that's great! If they don't, I won't even realise
Quote:
Ok look, i know it'd be nice if all things were the same for both genders and stuff but....
I am a guy, you are a girl, meaning that the game dynamics are totally different, It's a fact.
You cannot compare yourself to a guy on okcupid, no matter how much you try to find similarities, it's still like comparing apples to oranges.
One main difference, any girl on okcupid would try to decrease her received messages (because they're too many already, hence why a lot of girls disable features like the visiting thing and enable the anonymous visiting) so she can filter them more efficiently, while any guy there would try to increase his received messages (which are far fewer than what a typical girl get there) to increase the probability of finding someone suitable.
I know I am receiving a lot of messages there but it still far fewer than what most girls receive.
Maybe a guy has to be a celeb there in order to beat an average girl in term of # of messages.
I am a guy, you are a girl, meaning that the game dynamics are totally different, It's a fact.
You cannot compare yourself to a guy on okcupid, no matter how much you try to find similarities, it's still like comparing apples to oranges.
One main difference, any girl on okcupid would try to decrease her received messages (because they're too many already, hence why a lot of girls disable features like the visiting thing and enable the anonymous visiting) so she can filter them more efficiently, while any guy there would try to increase his received messages (which are far fewer than what a typical girl get there) to increase the probability of finding someone suitable.
I know I am receiving a lot of messages there
but it still far fewer than what most girls receive.Maybe a guy has to be a celeb there in order to beat an average girl in term of # of messages.
Sure the dynamics are different, but a person reading too much into things is still a person reading too much into things. I'm saying that by not browsing anonymously, a tendancy to overanalyse can occur. There are a lot of posts on this site by people wondering why they haven't recieved a message back. Browsing anonymously can remove some of the stress of the game. This has nothing to do with gender as far as I can see. I said "guys" because I can only remember reading such posts from males.
I do not get that many messages any more, as I have been on the site for a while. I would rather increase them than decrease them. I am a girl. So your "any girl" statement is wrong. I do not browse anonymously for filtering purposes. I do it for the previous reasons I have talked about.
The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 44
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,664
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
13 Jun 2012, 4:32 am
13 Jun 2012, 5:05 am
AussieMatty
Velociraptor
Joined: 21 Mar 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 404
Location: Townsville, Queensland
13 Jun 2012, 6:09 am
13 Jun 2012, 11:23 am
13 Jun 2012, 11:43 am
13 Jun 2012, 7:52 pm
AussieMatty
Velociraptor
Joined: 21 Mar 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 404
Location: Townsville, Queensland
13 Jun 2012, 8:42 pm
13 Jun 2012, 8:48 pm
AussieMatty
Velociraptor
Joined: 21 Mar 2012
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 404
Location: Townsville, Queensland
13 Jun 2012, 9:16 pm
14 Jun 2012, 4:32 am
I am now just finished my profile. 
14 Jun 2012, 12:26 pm
