How Do I Get Laid?

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nthach
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24 Dec 2010, 1:43 am

countzarroff wrote:

nthach wrote:

countzarroff wrote:

Just don't beat yourself up for it. If anyone tries to tell you that they're better than you for getting laid, tell them that maybe they should consider a career in prostitution if that's their only claim to fame above you.

I'm probably one of a few virgins in my circle of friends/acquaintances. And I hate myself for it. Me and the mental sledgehammer are friends. I don't think I'll give up my virginity until I'm well into my 30s

It sucks.

Well you always have your friends here. I'm sorry to hear that its hurting you though. Tomorrow is always a new day.

It is. I feel like there's a big void in my life. Honestly, I rather have a girlfriend who loves me for who I am than some random fling. But I doubt I can find a girlfriend before I'm 30.

Beauty_pact
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24 Dec 2010, 3:04 am

Pistonhead wrote:

fb5b wrote:

Spot on! No girl is going to want to get with a guy who's posting threads asking how to get laid, Aspie or not!

Actually...quite a few do believe it or not. You just have to post pictures of your really long tongue :lol: or well have more to you than just that.

Unfortunately too correct. Promiscuity rules this horrid world.

deadeyexx
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24 Dec 2010, 9:11 am

Wombat wrote:

When I was in my early 20's I met a guy whose technique was to walk up to every girl at a party or bar and say "Hey, do you want to have sex with me?"

I said: "My god, you must get your face slapped a lot".

He said: "Yes I do, but very often one will say yes. This saves me a lot of time buying drinks for the wrong woman. If they all say no then I can spend the evening drinking with my buddies."

It makes sense in a crude way.

Ah, the no shame approach. I have a hard time doing it, but for those who can, it's surprisingly effective.

Numbers go up when you're dealing with women alone in public (no judgemental peers)

Go up even more if your approach is somewhat funny and endearing
ex. substitute "do you wanna have sex?" with "do you want to come to my place and play hungry-hungry hippos?"

IndispensablePG
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24 Dec 2010, 11:01 am

biostructure wrote:

IndispensablePG wrote:

Beauty_pact wrote:

One good way to get your hopes up for "getting laid" is to not start threads asking how to get laid. I do wonder how many females feel about this question being made, or would feel if they eventually found out.

Maybe they feel if they make enough topics about the subject, their wish will come true!

I do. And creating some has introduced me to some women on here who understand where I'm coming from, it's just logistically unrealistic for us to meet up.

Long distance relationships are mostly full of fail.

Beauty_pact
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24 Dec 2010, 12:33 pm

IndispensablePG wrote:

Long distance relationships are mostly full of fail.

Indeed. Normally unfaithfulness, which apparently is incredibly easy to do, since the relationship only is text-based, anyway... in the beginning, at least. And later phone calls are forgotten when you hang up, I guess. Not everyone, to say the very least, has the required imagination to feel that the relationship is real, when you don't meet face-to-face. Humans generally are mere animals with simple minds, so generally, long distance relationships are indeed doomed to meet failure.

Kilroy
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24 Dec 2010, 12:38 pm

They're not real, there is no feeling, no passion, just words
might as well be talking to a robot

Kilroy
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24 Dec 2010, 12:39 pm

Last edited by Kilroy on 24 Dec 2010, 1:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.

NeantHumain
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24 Dec 2010, 1:16 pm

Mindslave wrote:

Everyone told me alcohol was great, and that tasted bad. Everyone told me weed was great, and that wasn't too good either. Everyone told me parties were great, and they aren't. They all sounded boring, and it turns out they are. Sex always sounded the same way. And everyone told me sex is great. Hmmmmm...

Sex > alcohol.

emlion
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24 Dec 2010, 1:22 pm

NeantHumain wrote:

Mindslave wrote:

Sex > alcohol.

sex > most things.
however intimacy > sex.

Beauty_pact
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24 Dec 2010, 4:40 pm

Kilroy wrote:

They're not real, there is no feeling, no passion, just words
might as well be talking to a robot

I always interpreted it otherwise, but as you and me have established in another thread, I am crazy, so my ability to have feelings and passion through text must be a sign of something being "wrong" with me.

Thank god for being so messed up, of course... in my case, it means I am above the animalistic, vast majority of humanity.

/end rant. I have been drinking. I love to rant when I am unsober.

Kilroy
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24 Dec 2010, 4:43 pm

I was referring to online relationships

yeah you're a very special snowflake
enjoy that

Beauty_pact
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24 Dec 2010, 4:47 pm

Kilroy wrote:

I was referring to online relationships

yeah you're a very special snowflake
enjoy that

Ah, well that's what I was referring to, as well.

Thank you. I take that as a compliment, even though I know it wasn't intended that way.

slaparoundmypeers
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24 Dec 2010, 5:23 pm

fb5b wrote:

Dude you're 17, what the hell is your rush?

I was 17 when I had my virginity token away And now I might have a 5 year old love child. I was lucky as hell that I didn't catch Aids cause stupid me forgot to wrap up. I might of caught crabs but that was a long time ago... She was 18 and had a mind of a 12 year old. The sex was.... not good cause she kept rushing me plus my own damn brother showed up at her house knocking on the door which interrupted us. My Aunt and Grandmother knew cause I came home glowing with a funny look on my face. Thank God they never told my mother but I think she knew. lol My Aunt and Grandmother never said anything about it but my Aunt told me she and her knew at the time. And the child? Well I found my old girlfriend on FaceBook and she had a picture of a 5 year old boy named joseph who looked a hell a lot like me when I was that age. I don't know if he is but he is 5 and it was 5 years ago that I *did* the mother. Hmmm?

IndispensablePG
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25 Dec 2010, 3:04 am

I take it that your child won't see his daddy then.

glamourdollxoxo
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25 Dec 2010, 3:07 am

slaparoundmypeers wrote:

fb5b wrote:

Dude you're 17, what the hell is your rush?

If she thought you were the father most girls would have broached the subject right when they found out they were pregnant to get child support or try to establish some kind of relationship with the father so I'm assuming her mental state has something to do with it. If you are really curious or want to have some kind of father son relationship get a DNA test right away. Also the timing could be coincidence because just because she slept with you does not mean she didn't sleep with others along the way in those 5 years.

menintights
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25 Dec 2010, 3:29 am

I didn't get the impression that he wants to be an adult about it and do what he has to do, all he cares about is how lucky he is that he didn't "catch AIDS" and that his aunt and grandmother didn't tell his mother that he had sex at 17. :roll:

Poor kid. It must be tough having dumbasses as his biological parents.

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