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How young would you go?

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nick007
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25 Mar 2011, 9:23 pm

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
CrinklyCrustacean wrote:
nick007 wrote:
But when I make a comment about liking someone who's a teenager; some people including the psychs I've saw are extremely quick to judge me as a pedophile when it's NOT a sexual thing; I'm a borderline asexual.

I've often wondered why society doesn't distinguish between romantic relationships and sexual ones. The assumption that if people are dating then they must be having sex is illogical and unjustifed to me.


For most people, a romantic relationship includes a sexual component. What Nick is describing is unusual (not not in any way bad) so it's logical that most people have never considered such a relationship to be anything but a friendship.

That's very true but what ticks me off is that if it was mostly a sexual thing; I doubt many in my area would have a problem. It's like backwards


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TeaEarlGreyHot
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25 Mar 2011, 9:33 pm

Nick, there are a lot of people that have ass backwards views. I've learned just to smile and nod, then run like hell when they aren't looking. :-)


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CrinklyCrustacean
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25 Mar 2011, 9:37 pm

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
For most people, a romantic relationship includes a sexual component. What Nick is describing is unusual (not not in any way bad) so it's logical that most people have never considered such a relationship to be anything but a friendship.

How odd. So a relationship implies sex, but sex doesn't imply a relationship?



TeaEarlGreyHot
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25 Mar 2011, 9:44 pm

CrinklyCrustacean wrote:
TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
For most people, a romantic relationship includes a sexual component. What Nick is describing is unusual (not not in any way bad) so it's logical that most people have never considered such a relationship to be anything but a friendship.

How odd. So a relationship implies sex, but sex doesn't imply a relationship?


It's just the way most people see it because it's all they know. To them, the thinking is quite logical.

Most people can't see past their own experiences and feelings to understand another way of thinking/feeling. That's just how it is. Getting upset over it is like getting upset that water is wet. You can't change it, so learning to accept it is really all you can do.


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CrinklyCrustacean
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25 Mar 2011, 9:47 pm

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
CrinklyCrustacean wrote:
TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
For most people, a romantic relationship includes a sexual component. What Nick is describing is unusual (not not in any way bad) so it's logical that most people have never considered such a relationship to be anything but a friendship.

How odd. So a relationship implies sex, but sex doesn't imply a relationship?


It's just the way most people see it because it's all they know. To them, the thinking is quite logical.

Most people can't see past their own experiences and feelings to understand another way of thinking/feeling. That's just how it is. Getting upset over it is like getting upset that water is wet. You can't change it, so learning to accept it is really all you can do.

I'm not upset, it's worth knowing. :)



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26 Mar 2011, 5:24 pm

I agree with Nick.

Also, if a relationship - sex = friendship, then
does friends + "benefits" (sex) = a relationship?



Oh, and...I won't go younger than my own age...I'd prefer someone older, actually.


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manlyadam
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26 Mar 2011, 5:36 pm

I would be worried that someone too young would outgrow me, I would prefer someone my age or maybe a little bit older who is as immature as I am!



MCalavera
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26 Mar 2011, 5:39 pm

Bethie wrote:
Also, if a relationship - sex = friendship, then
does friends + "benefits" (sex) = a relationship?


Yes, it's a real relationship.

In answer to the OP's question, the least I'd go for is 20 years old. And even then, I'm very very picky when it comes to those between the age of 20 and 25. Over 25, and it's a safe bet to assume that she's now mature enough to be in a friendship/relationship with me. Of course, there are those who never grow up, so those are excluded.



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26 Mar 2011, 5:45 pm

MCalavera wrote:
Bethie wrote:
Also, if a relationship - sex = friendship, then
does friends + "benefits" (sex) = a relationship?


Yes, it's a real relationship.



That's interesting, because the phrase is used to denote friends who have sex and are NOT in a relationship...


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MCalavera
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26 Mar 2011, 5:52 pm

Bethie wrote:
MCalavera wrote:
Bethie wrote:
Also, if a relationship - sex = friendship, then
does friends + "benefits" (sex) = a relationship?


Yes, it's a real relationship.



That's interesting, because the phrase is used to denote friends who have sex and are NOT in a relationship...


Friendship is a relationship. Benefits (Sex) makes it even more intimate as a relationship.

Those who say it's not a relationship are just bullshitting themselves.



Bethie
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26 Mar 2011, 5:54 pm

MCalavera wrote:
Bethie wrote:
MCalavera wrote:
Bethie wrote:
Also, if a relationship - sex = friendship, then
does friends + "benefits" (sex) = a relationship?


Yes, it's a real relationship.



That's interesting, because the phrase is used to denote friends who have sex and are NOT in a relationship...


Friendship is a relationship. Benefits (Sex) makes it even more intimate as a relationship.

Those who say it's not a relationship are just bullshitting themselves.


Well, I guess I should have specified ROMANTIC relationship.

I would agree that friends + sex = a romantic relationship,
but not that a romantic relationship HAS to include sex.
That's just a preference, if one the vast majority of people seem to have.


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Grisha
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26 Mar 2011, 6:01 pm

Bethie wrote:

Well, I guess I should have specified ROMANTIC relationship.

I would agree that friends + sex = a romantic relationship,
but not that a romantic relationship HAS to include sex.
That's just a preference, if one the vast majority of people seem to have.


What's the difference between "friends" and a "romantic (but non-sexual) relationship"? Kissing?



Bethie
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26 Mar 2011, 6:16 pm

Grisha wrote:
Bethie wrote:

Well, I guess I should have specified ROMANTIC relationship.

I would agree that friends + sex = a romantic relationship,
but not that a romantic relationship HAS to include sex.
That's just a preference, if one the vast majority of people seem to have.


What's the difference between "friends" and a "romantic (but non-sexual) relationship"? Kissing?


Well, no, not all non-sexual romantic relationships include kissing, though some do.


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Last edited by Bethie on 26 Mar 2011, 6:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.

The_Face_of_Boo
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26 Mar 2011, 6:19 pm

Grisha wrote:
Bethie wrote:

Well, I guess I should have specified ROMANTIC relationship.

I would agree that friends + sex = a romantic relationship,
but not that a romantic relationship HAS to include sex.
That's just a preference, if one the vast majority of people seem to have.


What's the difference between "friends" and a "romantic (but non-sexual) relationship"? Kissing?


umm.......love?

You know...this damned thing that all cultures sing about it? :heart:



Jonsi
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26 Mar 2011, 6:19 pm

I'm eighteen but I wouldn't go any lower than twenty.



MCalavera
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26 Mar 2011, 6:21 pm

Bethie wrote:
Well, I guess I should have specified ROMANTIC relationship.

I would agree that friends + sex = a romantic relationship,
but not that a romantic relationship HAS to include sex.
That's just a preference, if one the vast majority of people seem to have.


Yes, I remember your posts in another thread. True, a romantic relationship doesn't have to involve sex, but something's missing when six is not in it. Maybe you're not seeing the romantic side to sex much.

Let me help you out.

Trying to please someone sexually is love => romance

Trying to get the other person to orgasm and experience strong intense good feelings is love => romance

In the same way that cuddling is love, cuddling and joining the two genitals together is love => romance

Need I say more or are you now convinced? :P