Question for those who don't fit the 'perfect' woman

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hale_bopp
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26 Mar 2011, 5:21 am

Being called overweight might actally make me take the fact I am overweight seriously. I don't want to make excuses for myself by saying I'm "curvy".

This is curvy (and airbrushed, but still curvy)
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I am overweight.



Bethie
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26 Mar 2011, 8:13 am

all_white wrote:

He's not suggesting we replace people's names with an adjective:

"Hi, Fatty! How's it going?"


ROFL!! !

I'm sorry, but I laughed at this for a good five minutes.

I don't mind being called "fat", cause that's what I am-

HOWEVER

I also think that labels are only as offensive as they're intended to be,
and I've noticed that people who describe others as "fat"
tend to be a lot more prejudiced and bigoted toward us
than those who use words like "overweight", "plump", "husky", whatever.


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Bethie
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26 Mar 2011, 8:17 am

hale_bopp wrote:
Being called overweight might actally make me take the fact I am overweight seriously. I don't want to make excuses for myself by saying I'm "curvy".



I don't see how "curvy" is an excuse,
or even why someone needs one to justify being a certain size or shape.

:?

I would agree, though, that "overweight" and "curvy" are not interchangeable, per se,
but they do often coincide-
I have a huge ass and enormous boobs, which lends my appearance the "curvy" label,
but those also make me overweight, versus if they weren't so large.


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Grisha
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26 Mar 2011, 8:36 am

all_white wrote:
Grisha wrote:

Why do so many people think they're "supposed" to look like a movie star and blame the "media" for planting the idea in their head? :roll:


Personally, I don't. I'm perfectly happy having a big bum.

But a lot of people out there (both men and women) have had their perceptions of "normal" messed up by the media, and consequently think my big bum makes me fat.

It's their problem, not mine. :wink:


Actually, I'll bet that your bum isn't even "big" - many women seem to think this unless their butt looks like an 8 YO boy's... :roll:



hale_bopp
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26 Mar 2011, 8:37 am

Bethie wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
Being called overweight might actally make me take the fact I am overweight seriously. I don't want to make excuses for myself by saying I'm "curvy".



I don't see how "curvy" is an excuse,
or even why someone needs one to justify being a certain size or shape.

:?

I would agree, though, that "overweight" and "curvy" are not interchangeable, per se,
but they do often coincide-
I have a huge ass and enormous boobs, which lends my appearance the "curvy" label,
but those also make me overweight, versus if they weren't so large.


/shrug some obviously obese people call themselves curvy or chubby or cuddly to make it seem better to themselves.

curvy imo is having weight on the right places. For a woman this is boobs hips and thighs.
Fat imo is just being fat everywhere, like I am. Except I don't have wide hips.

One morbidly obese woman on a dating site I go to made a thread called "Why don't men like women with curves?" and banned everyone in the thread who said curvy and fat aren't the same thing.



Grisha
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26 Mar 2011, 8:45 am

Back to the OP.

One more than one occasion, when the subject came up, I've heard O/O people refer to themselves as being "big". That's the adjective I would use in polite conversation if I was forced to discuss the issue, otherwise I wouldn't mention it at all.



Bethie
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26 Mar 2011, 8:54 am

hale_bopp wrote:
/shrug some obviously obese people call themselves curvy or chubby or cuddly to make it seem better to themselves.

curvy imo is having weight on the right places. For a woman this is boobs hips and thighs.
Fat imo is just being fat everywhere, like I am. Except I don't have wide hips.

One morbidly obese woman on a dating site I go to made a thread called "Why don't men like women with curves?" and banned everyone in the thread who said curvy and fat aren't the same thing.


I guess I don't buy into fat in one place being more "right" than in another.

Though that lady sounds pretty-closed minded to other views.


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hale_bopp
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26 Mar 2011, 9:01 am

Well right to some people is wrong to others, but generally speaking, fat on the boobs, hips and thighs is the most acceptable on a woman.

This is generally speaking.

Example: If you took 100,000 men from a variety of places with different attributes more would find a big bum of boobs attractive than a big stomach or double chins. Yeah theres likely people out there with a double chin fetish but they are in the minority.



Bethie
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26 Mar 2011, 9:06 am

hale_bopp wrote:
Well right to some people is wrong to others, but generally speaking, fat on the boobs, hips and thighs is the most acceptable on a woman.

This is generally speaking.

Example: If you took 100,000 men from a variety of places with different attributes more would find a big bum of boobs attractive than a big stomach or double chins. Yeah theres likely people out there with a double chin fetish but they are in the minority.


True. I guess I wasn't really speaking to conventional or popular ideals.


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26 Mar 2011, 9:43 am

hale_bopp wrote:

This is curvy (and airbrushed, but still curvy)


Actually I think she might fall into the "slightly overweight" category.

She does carry quite a lot of fat on her hips.

I still think she's beautiful, though.

That's one of the Bravissimo models. I am a Bravissimo customer and when they send me the mag I enjoy carefully scrutinising all the pics and trying to work out who has what in terms of body fat. It annoys me that they bowed to customer demand and switched to using models whose figures were more representative of those of their customers, yet they still airbrush them. The thing about their airbrushing is that it's not consistent. They don't do the same things to each model in every pic. If that model were on the front cover they'd make sure they'd give her a six-pack, but for the photos inside the catalogue, they won'talways bother. From piecing together bits of one photo and bits of another, you can work out more or less what body they really have. I'd say that particular model is rather overweight and she's also not into exercise, unlike some of the other models who have genuinely toned bodies that don't always rely on the airbrush.

Anyway. I'm waffling. Sorry. Bras are one of my "special interests" and no one ever wants to hear about them but me. :oops:



all_white
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26 Mar 2011, 9:46 am

Grisha wrote:

Actually, I'll bet that your bum isn't even "big" - many women seem to think this unless their butt looks like an 8 YO boy's... :roll:


Actually, it is.

But you'll just have to take my word for it. I don't really feel like posting a pic of my bum for you to scrutinise!



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26 Mar 2011, 9:47 am

all_white wrote:
I'd say that particular model is rather overweight and she's also not into exercise, unlike some of the other models who have genuinely toned bodies that don't always rely on the airbrush.



She'd be considered thin where I live, and I don't know WHERE (outside of the fashion industry) she'd be considered rather overweight.

I also don't think you can judge someone's exercise habits by a photo, barring absolute extremes.


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Last edited by Bethie on 26 Mar 2011, 9:51 am, edited 1 time in total.

Bethie
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26 Mar 2011, 9:50 am

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
It takes a lot of hard work not to buy into it all.


Definitely. Even though I strongly oppose impossible beauty standards being imposed on women rationally (and ethically)
it's still extremely hard to not judge myself by them,
because I've grown up in a society where people are absolutely indoctrinated into it.

Results in a real cognitive dissonance.


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26 Mar 2011, 9:56 am

all_white wrote:
Anyway. I'm waffling. Sorry. Bras are one of my "special interests" and no one ever wants to hear about them but me. :oops:


Don't jump to any hasty conclusions, I'm pretty fond of them myself (but for an entiely different reason of course) :wink:



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26 Mar 2011, 10:02 am

Bethie wrote:
all_white wrote:
I'd say that particular model is rather overweight and she's also not into exercise, unlike some of the other models who have genuinely toned bodies that don't always rely on the airbrush.



She'd be considered thin where I live, and I don't think you can judge someone's exercise habits by a photo, barring absolute extremes.

:?


I was making a statement based on her probable BMI, not based on how fat or thin our neighbours are... :wink:

Like I said, I still think she's beautiful.

Who invented BMI, anyway? :evil:

Bl**dy Male Ignoramus?

Sometimes I like to amuse myself by thinking for alternative meanings for acronyms. Hmm...

Blubber Most Inviting

Boobs Make Icons

Booty: Main Interest

Blow My Innocence

Bans Most Ice-cream

Beauty: Mission Impossible

Any more ideas? :D



Bethie
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26 Mar 2011, 10:18 am

all_white wrote:
Bethie wrote:
all_white wrote:
I'd say that particular model is rather overweight and she's also not into exercise, unlike some of the other models who have genuinely toned bodies that don't always rely on the airbrush.



She'd be considered thin where I live, and I don't think you can judge someone's exercise habits by a photo, barring absolute extremes.

:?


I was making a statement based on her probable BMI, not based on how fat or thin our neighbours are... :wink:

Like I said, I still think she's beautiful.

Who invented BMI, anyway? :evil:

Bl**dy Male Ignoramus?

Sometimes I like to amuse myself by thinking for alternative meanings for acronyms. Hmm...

Blubber Most Inviting

Boobs Make Icons

Booty: Main Interest

Blow My Innocence

Bans Most Ice-cream

Beauty: Mission Impossible

Any more ideas? :D


You're a trip. :D


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For there is another kind of violence, slower but just as deadly, destructive as the shot or the bomb in the night. This is the violence of institutions; indifference and inaction and slow decay.