Why do I rarely get any attention on dating sites?

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wtfid2
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18 Oct 2012, 9:17 pm

LoriB wrote:

Be careful with copy and paste. I would tend to get the exact message from the same guy and it was obvious what it was. A girl wants to feel special. Using her name is a great idea and the advice about not interigating is as well. The one line question I almost always responded to. And don't be in a rush to meet. Get to know her through email or I'M first. As for those who have never been kissed I am not sure why you have to tell. She wont necessarily know. I really wouldn't tell her. You may not be great the first time but it won't take you many kisses to figure it out... And I hope that didn't sound rude. It was not my intention

th girls on these sites feel plenty special..special to the point of being b*****s. It doesnt matter what you say, if they like you they like you.if not they won't respond. For proof, i did an experiment and copied wolfheart's profile..an I still have 0 success :p

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MXH
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18 Oct 2012, 9:34 pm

wtfid2 wrote:

LoriB wrote:

Because his profile was silly and worthless. It was simply filler material. It didnt have a point or sense.

Colin88
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19 Oct 2012, 3:24 pm

The only messages I ever got there were from lonely, desperate and clingy girls. Sure, I like attention, but I don't wanna be smothered by it.

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WantToHaveALife
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20 Oct 2012, 1:37 am

wtfid2 wrote:

WantToHaveALife wrote:

Colin88 wrote:

I'm terrible at it in real life, so dating sites are my last resort. Unless I can find a wingman/woman

anything worth having never comes easy unfortuneately :cry:

only for guys like us :p

yup it sucks

hale_bopp
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20 Oct 2012, 11:39 pm

That's normal for dating sites. Don't think it's you - it isn't.

DerStadtschutz
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21 Oct 2012, 12:52 am

Colin88 wrote:

The only messages I ever got there were from lonely, desperate and clingy girls. Sure, I like attention, but I don't wanna be smothered by it.

A guy who's asking for dating advice on an online forum is complaining about lonely, desperate girls contacting him... My irony detector just f*****g exploded.

All I know is that when I'm looking for a girl, I try to be honest and upfront about things. That, and I don't try to go after the same stuff everybody else goes after because there's no point. You're desperate and lonely... Take a second to realize that, and then ask yourself, if you don't want someone like that, why the hell should anyone else want you?

I really don't understand people at all, not even fellow aspies... It's like the world is full of people mostly covered in mud, but all the muddy people want someone that sparkles, shines, and smells like flowers... If you want someone to take a chance on you, you have to be willing to do the same. It's not like some supermodel will see you and feel sorry for you and then become the love of your life. It doesn't work that way, and life's not a damn fairy tale. I'm not saying you should date the 500 pound woman on maury povich who's literally stuck in her bedroom because she's too fat and never does anything. I can't see why ANYONE would want that. But you have to be willing to look past a few flaws because everybody has them. But it seems like everyone wants someone without any, and that's just not reality.

Wolfheart
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21 Oct 2012, 2:23 am

MXH wrote:

wtfid2 wrote:

LoriB wrote:

Because his profile was silly and worthless. It was simply filler material. It didnt have a point or sense.

A few of the messages I have received in the past 24 hours.

"Definitely cracked a smile and giggled!"

"Hello there!:) awww i think YOU are adorable! you can make me smile!thats definitely a good thing! i´d love to get to know you better as well...and cooking for you? definitely! and nope, im not gonna use you for your body...you are handsome, and your body is just bonus!:D no really, u seem pretty cool, u can make me laugh like nobody long time!"

"Your profile actually made me laugh out aloud"

"Hi how are you? Nice profile. Fancy a chat sometime?xx"

It does what it is meant to do and creates interest and an opening. You need to use original jokes that work with your type of humour. If you have a playful profile, girls will expect you to be playful in your messages.

MXH
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21 Oct 2012, 2:34 am

Wolfheart wrote:

MXH wrote:

wtfid2 wrote:

LoriB wrote:

Because his profile was silly and worthless. It was simply filler material. It didnt have a point or sense.

those dont sound any different from the copypasted message saying she has an interesting profile. fact is people lie. hell, even one of those you posted got caught in her own lie. but the ultimate testament is that someone else ripped it off and didnt work at all.

now im not saying that you shouldnt have a couple of jokes here and there. But having a profile thats just a bunch of silly things which dont actually make any sense isnt what 99% of the guys here need.

Wolfheart
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21 Oct 2012, 2:42 am

MXH wrote:

Wolfheart wrote:

MXH wrote:

wtfid2 wrote:

LoriB wrote:

Because his profile was silly and worthless. It was simply filler material. It didnt have a point or sense.

those dont sound any different from the copypasted message saying she has an interesting profile. fact is people lie. hell, even one of those you posted got caught in her own lie.

now im not saying that you shouldnt have a couple of jokes here and there. But having a profile thats just a bunch of silly things which dont actually make any sense isnt what 99% of the guys here need.

If a girl messages you first, it means you have her attention and she is showing outright interest which is better than a cold approach. So the profile does what it is meant to do by getting the initial interest and creating an opening.

MXH
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21 Oct 2012, 2:45 am

Wolfheart wrote:

i know exactly what it means. Ive only messaged one girl iny my life and it was to say she misspelled something. all of my conversations have been girls that message me first. I have had some message me about how i seem like such a cool and funny guy and 6 messages later ask me something thats obviously stated in my profile. The cool/funny thing is just a general compliment. And thats all before going into what types of girls look at which of my profiles.

Wolfheart
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21 Oct 2012, 2:47 am

MXH wrote:

Wolfheart wrote:

MXH wrote:

wtfid2 wrote:

LoriB wrote:

Because his profile was silly and worthless. It was simply filler material. It didnt have a point or sense.

That's not a testament because the profile is specifically designed to make British girls laugh and smile which it does, it creates a positive first impression and an opening to continue being positive, playful and fun.

A more American version would involve more slapstick humour and focus on things that are relevant to girls from the US and again, wtfid2 should make his own jokes.

Wolfheart
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21 Oct 2012, 2:49 am

MXH wrote:

Wolfheart wrote:

How many have you met for a date?

MXH
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21 Oct 2012, 2:49 am

Wolfheart wrote:

though to be fair that is not how you said it in the past. I do recall you telling guys to copy your profile word by word.

Lets have a thought experiment here for a second, i invite everyone here to run this.
so open up your fav dating site. Now i want you to try to find a girl which you like so much that you would message her (not asking to message her, just someone that you would).

dont be a cheater...

ok, so how did you find that person? most chances are that you probably opened some page with a dozen or more photos, from there you subconsciously gave all a quick rating of interested or not. And then went ahead to validate that feeling by checking their profile. So the profile itself didnt create the attraction. It lead you to confirm it, to wether shes someone you would go after or not.

Last edited by MXH on 21 Oct 2012, 2:55 am, edited 1 time in total.

Who_Am_I
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21 Oct 2012, 2:50 am

wtfid2 wrote:

LoriB wrote:

Not liking you does not make someone a b***h, it just means they don't like you. Noone is obliged to like you, just as you aren't obliged to like anyone you don't like.

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Wolfheart
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21 Oct 2012, 2:53 am

MXH wrote:

Wolfheart wrote:

though to be fair that is not how you said it in the past. I do recall you telling guys to copy your profile word by word

I can't recall stating anyone should copy it word by word as it may not reflect their personality, if someone has a playful personality and that doesn't show in their messages or on a date. It isn't going to go well because the woman had different expectations of how the person they are meeting would be.

Honesty is vital when it comes to creating a profile and making one that is expressive and true to yourself is important if you want to attract someone that likes you for you.

Wolfheart
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21 Oct 2012, 2:56 am

Also we don't know what type of girls wtfid2 is approaching, he has stated that he has received messages from women in the past but he doesn't date or reciprocate interest in them because he believes he is in a higher league to them.

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