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I am looking at everyone. It's research. I am looking for patterns.

Exactly. He is an intelligent guy obviously so he might have gotten the same results if he wrote a decent enough profile and answered questions that he thought were important to him.


How about this weekend? Saturday night? I'm like 90% serious.



I agree that success on OKC is very hard but I'm sure women were not always the one who did the rejecting.
I'd say that a tall handsome successful geek like him is desired by certain types of women (like those women in the B group - "slightly older women who held professional creative jobs, like editors and designers", the group he eventually focused on).

Yeah, it's totally discouraging. An acquaintance of mine (gay man) told me he dated about 100 guys on OKC during one year before he met his current partner. There is no way I can muster up that kind of mental energy. I gave up after 4 dates lol

Oh noes! I am at home dying from super strength man flu. You are welcome to come and share my germs but somehow that doesn't sound like a good substitute for gay dancing

Darn. Maybe next time I'm in London

man flu?

aww shucks, suckynation

Yeah, man flu. I feel like I'm dying, it just keeps getting worse. bleh

I've answered I believe over 1,500 questions (on tablet away from home and don't want to reset my password to check) and have had 95%+ matches with under 5% enemy rating, with people who don't really seem compatible with me - most often people who seem to be out at bars every Friday and are looking for someone to travel the world with.

Am I not compatible with anyone equally introverted who prefers staying at home and watching movies and finds social situations stressful?

That's really interesting. Perhaps you are not as introverted as you seem to think?

It affects few men in real life too, the "super hot players" subtype of men, but I bet you never find those on dating sites. These are men who literally can attract any woman they want, I personally knew one closely for years, he was a work partner (a freelancer salesperson and equipment installer) before he creates his own firm, he was in his 40s when I first started working with him, he has an Adonis body, very handsome, confident, high social skills, very smooth and everything is very manly and alpha about him (voice, jaws, character, body.... no idea about his dick), he has two kids (who live with their mother) and he did admit it to me she divorced him because he slept with other women.

It only took him few months of work to get him popularity among the female clientele, ladies kept asking for his services for the most minor and stupidest issues regarding their purchased hardware and they kept insisting on sending them this specific man, they've never accepted to send someone else even if they had to wait much longer. After questioning him, he eventually admitted that he slept with some of the clients whom are most of them are partner banks' clients or bankers (Eeek!) and I've totally believed him because the way those lady clients acted and wanted him in particular wasn't normal at all.

I've told my CEO about it and my concerns how it might jeopardize our relations with the banks and clients (and clients' husbands?), my CEO smiled and he was like sarcastiaclly "Oh, you are being Mr. Ethical now. Just give the clients what they want, the more satisfied they are the more money for us" and he said hence he was a freelancer then we wouldn't be held responsible of any mess it might occur out of this, I hate to admit it, but my CEO was right and figures proved that this man was good for business, our #1 freelance salesperson for all the years he worked with us.

He eventually got married again with a beauty-goddess, a very classy mixed Ukrainian (and from mixture of Ukrainian/Polish/Russian) young doctor working in Beirut, and this was not only my subjective opinion about her physical beauty, when he first introduced her to me in my office I've noticed a crowd of my male colleagues gathering and peeking behind the shutters and they asked me later "What was this in your office?" afterward .

But despite this, he never stopped his....sexual conquest, he kept giving his "harem" of clients what they wanted and I was very current about all of this because he never ceased to tell me about them at lunches/coffee breaks (and all his stories were backed up with messages, pics and texts he showed me...yea, everything were extremely obvious what's happening), I think he saw me as a trustworthy buddy and yes, I kept silent about all the details for years, now i am talking about it anonymously on WP for the first time .

When I've visited him the last time (he no longer working with us), he told me that his wife has divorced him and went back to her country and all that was because of a new Russian woman in his life, he showed me on FB his pics wit his new (Russian) gf, gorgeous indeed but very younger and way way less classy (typical party dumb girl) than his Ukrainian former wife. I couldn't resit to ask him then "why do you do that?", he just smiled and shrugged sarcastically saying "I can't! I really can't".

Yes, I believe that he can't stop because he's addicted to this diversified sexual and shallow dating lifestyle; all this the constant limitless options of beautiful women he continuously gets had somehow shaped this kind of addiction in his mind rendering him too crippled for anything long term. And oh, he's extremely picky regarding looks, what others find them beautiful and cute, he usually finds them very ugly.

Please shoot me.

Arkansas was one of my worst states also.I am doomed.

The guy is clever, but not that clever. His method seemed to optimise for "number of dates" - and that's exactly what he got. He then had to heavily filter the women he met, which is highly inefficient, as he admits in the article. I don't see why he didn't first estimate, based on the individual profiles, which women he might actually be interested in and then optimised his profile to get dates with them.

46.

I give Leafplant one month on okcupid before she becomes too full of herself and starts to ignore us mortal guys here.

Leafplant reminds me of the gossipy girls I knew back when I was in education. Her writing style is similar to their speaking style, albeit in a more North American vernacular....omg...super....awkward....that was creepy....weird....just like wow....

I mean no offence, just an observation.

Last edited by Acedia on 22 Jan 2014, 3:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Actually, the way OKCupid, Plenty of Fish (PoF), and other free dating websites ( http://www.alldatingwebsites.com/dir/free-datingsites/ ) make money is through advertising. They take the information you provide them about yourself, and pass it along to third party marketing and advertising firms. All of the information you provide them. In OKCupid's case, this includes your answers to those (often quite personal) questions (see http://www.npr.org/blogs/alltechconside ... any-access ). A few dating websites (such as gotinder.com and zoosk.com ) are more directly integrated with FB profiles. Also, there are often basic security flaws in some of the free websites.


I believe that OKCupid has (at least) two matching algorithms. The basic matching algorithm is used to select profiles for your "Quiver" and those shown in the side-bar. It matches people by their demographic and geographic information, and what they have specified in the "Who you are looking for" section. The advanced matching algorithm uses responses to the match questions. (It is rumoured to also use information from your written profile and your appearance in your pictures.)

In my experience, the basic matching algorithm was crap, and the advanced one was only marginally better. I wasted a lot of time on the questions and writing my profile, but (similar to Deuterium) I found I had little in common with most of the women, no matter how high the match score was.

There are several problems with the advanced matching based on the questions. First, many of the questions, and their associated response options, are poorly phrased and/or irrelevant (if not idiotic). Second, most people only complete a few dozen of the questions, so no matter how many you complete, there is usually very little to match with. Finally, many people seem to put very little thought into their responses and what responses they consider acceptable or unacceptable in others. (In my experience, the responses of some people, within questions and/or across questions, seemed contradictory.)

For a more positive take, in the following article the writer interviews some of the people behind the websites OKCupid.com, eHarmony.com, Match.com and Chemistry.com
"Looking for Someone: Sex, love, and loneliness on the Internet", by Nick Paumgarten
http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2011 ... paumgarten

OMG I am totes reporting you to the Mods, you are, like, harshing my mellow, weirdo creep!

Akshully, I haz no idea how kids are saying things these days. And I am very flattered that I appear to project a mask of socially adept person from North America. Muahaha