pof is another pathetic site.

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So women who aren't skinny are automatically not dating material in your eyes? Yet you are complaining about women being picky about male appearances.

You're making this far too technical and mathmatical....I mean for one that is assuming each 1 girl actually has 10 males interested in her. In my personal experience I haven't had guys 'fighting' over me I'd get maybe a couple messeges every couple of weeks if that and usually they were spammy or really short and screamed 'I just want a sex hook up'. But few and between I'd get interesting messages and respond...sometimes the guy would eventually just stop messaging without expressing any desire to meet in person.

I Have met 5 guys from there in person two who I dated ended it with me once it started getting serious. I 'hooked up' with one but I thought he was actually into me specifically, he wasn't very direct about his intentions till after we had sex a few times. Then one I met once and we watched a movie at his house then he took me home and never contacted me again. Then finally the last one who I am still dating and we aren't planning to break up anytime soon....but yeah a total of 5 guys is all I've met so doesn't give the impression that there have ever been 10 people trying to get with me specifically at once on okcupid. Maybe more conventionally attractive 'normal' sort of women get a lot more hits to choose from.

Well, if getting f****d is part of your endgame, then you're golden.

Well I'd hardly have called myself well of at the time (or now). At that time I was on unemployment barely getting anything.

But if you can't afford it you can't. I just think that the free ones would attract more transient types who are "just curious". Seems like it would be the online equivalent of meeting your future spouse at local bar on ladies night. Chances= slim to none, disappointment inevitable.

As an interesting side note, when I was doing this online dating stuff it was when eHarmony first came out. I was attracted to their advertisements regarding deeper connections so I wanted to try. It was free so I figured what the heck. Go to the site. It says, complete the test, fill out your info and at the end we'll show you who of our however many thousand people they said they had that match. Ok, I thought. The personality thing was LONG, took like 45 min. As Im doing it I'm thinking, ah this should produce good results at least, very detailed. After I was done, would you believe the thing told me there was literally no one in their entire database that matched me? Not one female! Talk about a kick in the balls! Not a self-esteem builder at all.

That was my first indication that I really was just not like most of the rest of the world.

I thought the same thing. I never understood guys like this. Had a few friends over the years like this. Too much TV. Not enough experience. Real women don't look like the ones on TV/Movies. The very few that do will expect way more than you likely have to offer, physically and especially monetarily. ot to mention prepared to be a pushover, yes ma'am errand boy/bank account.

I don't know I don't think skinny girls are very attractive at all. What's hot about collar bones, ribs and flat asses?

The way I see it is this; you probably shouldn't demand anything where the equivalent couldn't be asked of you. A chick that does crossfit probably isn't interested in a fat slob for example, she'd probably be interested in someone else that shares that commitment to staying in shape. "Standards" are a two way street, considering where my life situation is, it's hard for me to make a lot of demands. Like I said, most attractive thing would probably be somebody being attracted to me but I guess how would I know that unless I initiate things? What that person looks like I don't know, I can't read it at all.

This is the main issue I usually run into:

That's also immature and disrespectful. They could do the mature things and let you know they're not interested anymore, but somehow they think it makes more sense to just not respond anymore. That is very rude. I've had girls tell me they found someone else and it didn't bother me, but for someone to just stop replying is completely rude.

Body weight is completely within one's control. Genetic looks (the main criteria that women base their choice of men on) aren't within one's control at all.

Also, there's a huge difference between slightly chubby and grotesquely overweight. When most men use the term "whale" to describe women, they're referring to the latter.

I disagree. You aren't owed an explanation from someone you barely know.

So this is like a game of tag your it sorta style. Wow what is this dating world coming to. Jeez wow.

Well that tells me your maturity level.

A chick who works out? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. A chick's idea of working out consists of a couple sets of air squats and then calling it a day. Repeat twice a week. Meanwhile her diet is s**t.

And do you know many guys I've met who were into the whole bodybuilding craze and still couldn't get laid? That probably describes half my gym.

I have met a lot of women whom are over weight and I consider them attractive. Some of them are actually active. All of the ones I have met that are very fat are very lazy and even admit to it. No one should be obligated to fit someone else's standard of beauty. That being stated, no one should guilt trip anyone else for not being attracted to certain types of people. There is such a double standard now. It's wrong for a man to want a woman that isn't lazy and takes care of herself, but it's okay for women to have high standards EVEN if they themselves are not that attractive by conventional standards.

Last edited by CommanderKeen on 10 Oct 2015, 10:27 am, edited 1 time in total.

If they're the men on this thread who complain they never ever hear back from women they've deemed "attractive" and messaged, there's an excellent chance they're (seriously) overestimating how attractive they are.

Looks matter but it's hardly the sole criteria women (or men) use to determine who to date. If it was, only the top 10-15% of people, looks-wise, would ever find partners.

You are aware that men do still message women whom they aren't attracted to, right?