30 years old and still alone

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The_Face_of_Boo
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15 Aug 2018, 1:30 pm

Since 16 years ago....things changed tremendously.

Fnord
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15 Aug 2018, 1:32 pm

Are they 'jerks' because they have girlfriends, or do they have girlfriends because they are 'jerks'?

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The_Face_of_Boo
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15 Aug 2018, 1:39 pm

Are you asking me?

I admit, I have a girlfriend now because I am a jerk. :lol:

Well, at least most people view my kind of relationship as a jerk/playboy thing.

Peacesells
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15 Aug 2018, 1:46 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I have a girlfriend

Sorta.

Quote:

Well, at least most people view my kind of relationship as a jerk/playboy thing.

I don't think anyone on this forum views you as a playboy, don't worry.

The_Face_of_Boo
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15 Aug 2018, 3:10 pm

Peacesells wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I have a girlfriend

Sorta.

Quote:

Well, at least most people view my kind of relationship as a jerk/playboy thing.

I don't think anyone on this forum views you as a playboy, don't worry.

I don't care about what the people think here, I was referring to people in real life; especially the women.... once they know i had/have FWB relations = "Oh, so you are a playboy".

Peacesells
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15 Aug 2018, 5:17 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

I don't care about what the people think here, I was referring to people in real life; especially the women.... once they know i had/have FWB relations = "Oh, so you are a playboy".

And are they serious?

Marknis
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15 Aug 2018, 5:30 pm

Fnord wrote:

Are they 'jerks' because they have girlfriends, or do they have girlfriends because they are 'jerks'?

It feels like the latter.

Marknis
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15 Aug 2018, 10:15 pm

HighLlama wrote:

I agree with those who said moving out might help, especially if your mom is stopping you. Also, does being around NT people at work affect you at all? For me it's hard being around "normal" people all day, since I can't really read many of their signals. I like solitude, but being the odd one out and always having to blend in definitely messes with your self-esteem, and that can lead to bad/rash relationship decisions. Just something to think about. It can make you feel ugly to have this "unspoken" standard constantly present.

I feel like I am constantly facing rednecks, hip hopper thugs, and bible thumpers when I am dealing with patrons. Sometimes I check out items to nerdy or geeky girls but they tend to already have boyfriends or husbands and that burns my nerves so much.

hobojungle
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16 Aug 2018, 10:05 am

AngelRho wrote:

You just have to understand that there is a fine line between frustrating a girl until she gives in and sleeps with you and being a creep.

Sounds like the same thing to me.

AngelRho
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16 Aug 2018, 11:53 am

hobojungle wrote:

AngelRho wrote:

You just have to understand that there is a fine line between frustrating a girl until she gives in and sleeps with you and being a creep.

Sounds like the same thing to me.

I meant sexually frustrating a woman. Tension and release. If a woman is genuinely offended by you, she’s not going to let you close enough to do anything, nor is she going to respond.

It’s not always easy to distinguish between the two. One guy can act like a jerk and she sees it as flirting. Another guy can copy the exact same behavior and the same girl will call the police.

Scientifically speaking, same causes in same environment yields same effects. You would think the next guy doing the same exact thing in the same exact place in the same exact context would get identical results as the first guy. Except the cause is different with a different guy.

Sometimes it works with different guys. But if you don’t fully understand what’s happening and you can’t duplicate same effects with that girl or any girl, it’s worth it to try something else that WON’T get you creepzoned. Sometimes it’s not the approach that’s a problem, just the girl. You have to take everything into account. Hence why there’a such a fine line between bf and creep.

rick42
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16 Aug 2018, 1:11 pm

Well,it's extremely common for Aspies to not be in a relationship by 30 years old.I'm 34 year and haven't been in a single relationship yet and most likely never will be in a relationship.

sorrowfairiewhisper
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16 Aug 2018, 2:24 pm

I've noticed Marknis, that maybe you can't meet a girl because you're still pining for this Ally lady that you used to be in contact with? forgive me if i'm wrong but i've noticed that you mention her alot in the post, it sounds to me that you're missing her still and you're feeling lonely and down because of her being gone.

Marknis
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16 Aug 2018, 3:25 pm

sorrowfairiewhisper wrote:

I don't have romantic feelings for her. I just miss talking to her because she was supportive of me wanting a girlfriend and told me she would make a celebratory thread for me if it happened.
I was trying to meet girls even when we talked.

sorrowfairiewhisper
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16 Aug 2018, 3:53 pm

Marknis wrote:

sorrowfairiewhisper wrote:

Oh i see. Aww that was nice of her to say that about doing a celebratory thread, how thoughtful. I hope you'll reunite and find your friend again. As for finding a girlfriend, i'm sure you will find someone. Try to not get down about it and focus on your hobbies and interests.

Marknis
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17 Aug 2018, 12:14 am

sorrowfairiewhisper wrote:

Marknis wrote:

sorrowfairiewhisper wrote:

I unfortunately also struggle with my hobbies. Whenever I attempt them, the results are always unsatisfactory and having depression makes me lose interest in them. It's a vicious cycle because I wish I was good at my interests but I've fallen far behind with them and I fear I can't catch up.

sleepingpancake
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17 Aug 2018, 12:55 am

but, but isn't age just a number?

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