Rexi
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Gender: Female
Posts: 2,388
Location: "I know there's nothing we can do. But my heart can't accept it." "If this is real, then I want to change the future."
17 Aug 2021, 2:21 pm
ironpony wrote:
The problem is sex therapy is that it's really expensive though and I was trying to avoid that if possible.
I told her what I like but when she does it it feels like she's like an actress putting on a performance rather than actually believing in what she's doing if that makes sense? or maybe that's my problem because I'm looking for too much realism?
I told her what I like but when she does it it feels like she's like an actress putting on a performance rather than actually believing in what she's doing if that makes sense? or maybe that's my problem because I'm looking for too much realism?
The problem is lack of communication. An idea of the same thing is different to different people especially people who have experienced different things. This is a common issue. You have to give her feedback on what shes doing good and direction on what she isnt. I know its easier to give up but you've only got yourself to blame if you do. No one can read your mind, it's not about waiting for luck to make it happen or leaving it to chance. It takes hard work and consistent involvement for improvement to happen. Good things come to those who wait.
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My Pepe Le Skunk. I have so much faith in our love for one another. Thanks for being an amazing partner.
x Any topic, PM me; mind my profile.
Rexi
Veteran
Joined: 3 Sep 2017
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,388
Location: "I know there's nothing we can do. But my heart can't accept it." "If this is real, then I want to change the future."
17 Aug 2021, 2:48 pm
ironpony wrote:
Pepe wrote:
ironpony wrote:
Oh are you asking me? Well I mean bad girl as in mostly in the bedroom, but it seems that those sexual qualities a woman possesses takes a backstep to dating. What I mean more so is, is that that the kinky is a woman in bed, the less date-able she seems in my experience. The more kinky ones just have more baggage to do deal with. I am not judging or stereortyping when I say this, I am just going by personal experience over the years.
You haven't answered my question.
We have narrowed down the field to the bedroom.
I always assumed that to be the case.
Then, in the bedroom, what makes a gurl "bad"?
And how bad is *too* bad?
Or is there no such thing as "too bad".
I guess a woman who is willing to do what I want but sometimes maybe I feel like I'm asking for too much when it comes to some women or at least the ones who I considered to be dating material more if that makes sense? I don't know if I should get into specifics on here...
You cant expect a woman to know what to do until you teach them. its like shouting at a dog for not doing what you want but youve not communicated to them in a way they understand or told them what theyre doing isn't good. All the blame gets put on the dog, stupid dog, etc. The dog is very intelligent. Trained dogs have done amazing incredible things for their owners.
_________________
My Pepe Le Skunk. I have so much faith in our love for one another. Thanks for being an amazing partner.
x Any topic, PM me; mind my profile.
Rexi
Veteran
Joined: 3 Sep 2017
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,388
Location: "I know there's nothing we can do. But my heart can't accept it." "If this is real, then I want to change the future."
17 Aug 2021, 2:56 pm
ironpony wrote:
Pepe wrote:
ironpony wrote:
Pepe wrote:
ironpony wrote:
Oh are you asking me? Well I mean bad girl as in mostly in the bedroom, but it seems that those sexual qualities a woman possesses takes a backstep to dating. What I mean more so is, is that that the kinky is a woman in bed, the less date-able she seems in my experience. The more kinky ones just have more baggage to do deal with. I am not judging or stereortyping when I say this, I am just going by personal experience over the years.
You haven't answered my question.
We have narrowed down the field to the bedroom.
I always assumed that to be the case.
Then, in the bedroom, what makes a gurl "bad"?
And how bad is *too* bad?
Or is there no such thing as "too bad".
I guess a woman who is willing to do what I want but sometimes maybe I feel like I'm asking for too much when it comes to some women or at least the ones who I considered to be dating material more if that makes sense? I don't know if I should get into specifics on here...
So, we are talking about anal.
It is quite common, these days.
No not that. I just find it hot when a woman becomes all dominating and makes it all about me. But I'm also kind of embarrassed to push it on someone who is not into it because it is a selfish way for a guy to be even though it turns me on. If that's bad?
its selfish for a guy in a relationship to ask what he needs from his girlfriend but it isnt to consider other women? Perhaps the way to think about real selfishness would be about not taking care of yourself and ultimately leaving a perfectly fit partner for you who is actually trying to please you and getting involved, perhaps even despite their preference?
Perhaps if you motivate a dog to get into the shower itll much happier do it and more naturally?
If you're like that, heck, all dogs would do it with disgust. </3
_________________
My Pepe Le Skunk. I have so much faith in our love for one another. Thanks for being an amazing partner.
x Any topic, PM me; mind my profile.
Sweetleaf
Veteran
Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 35,155
Location: Somewhere in Colorado
20 Aug 2021, 1:03 am
Rexi wrote:
ironpony wrote:
Pepe wrote:
ironpony wrote:
Pepe wrote:
ironpony wrote:
Oh are you asking me? Well I mean bad girl as in mostly in the bedroom, but it seems that those sexual qualities a woman possesses takes a backstep to dating. What I mean more so is, is that that the kinky is a woman in bed, the less date-able she seems in my experience. The more kinky ones just have more baggage to do deal with. I am not judging or stereortyping when I say this, I am just going by personal experience over the years.
You haven't answered my question.
We have narrowed down the field to the bedroom.
I always assumed that to be the case.
Then, in the bedroom, what makes a gurl "bad"?
And how bad is *too* bad?
Or is there no such thing as "too bad".
I guess a woman who is willing to do what I want but sometimes maybe I feel like I'm asking for too much when it comes to some women or at least the ones who I considered to be dating material more if that makes sense? I don't know if I should get into specifics on here...
So, we are talking about anal.
It is quite common, these days.
No not that. I just find it hot when a woman becomes all dominating and makes it all about me. But I'm also kind of embarrassed to push it on someone who is not into it because it is a selfish way for a guy to be even though it turns me on. If that's bad?
its selfish for a guy in a relationship to ask what he needs from his girlfriend but it isnt to consider other women? Perhaps the way to think about real selfishness would be about not taking care of yourself and ultimately leaving a perfectly fit partner for you who is actually trying to please you and getting involved, perhaps even despite their preference?
Perhaps if you motivate a dog to get into the shower itll much happier do it and more naturally?
If you're like that, heck, all dogs would do it with disgust. </3
Well if one is unsatisfied, it's not that hard to imagine they may think of if they moved on to other people. But yeah the O.P has not posted in a bit, but I did ask before if their gf was at all into it, like if she wanted to try and be more dominating. Kind of seems if she is at least willing to give it a try the O.P could try and have some patience, since perhaps she could get better at it(apparently she was a virgin before having sex with him, so like she is still fairly new to sex let alone trying to do like specific sexual activities) but if she's not into it, then she's not into it.
I like my boyfriend to be more dominating, and yeah without that...I just find sex boring and kind of a hassle, because I don't get what I want out of it. So I suppose If the O.P likes being dominated in sex, I can see why it would be hard for them to get satisfied without that. But so far it is unclear if their gf is willing to try that or if she is just not into it at all.
20 Aug 2021, 2:35 am
20 Aug 2021, 2:56 am
ironpony wrote:
Hey sorry for not responding for a while. So far I have just been testing things with her and being patient but is that a good thing, or the way to go?
No.
Sweetleaf
Veteran
Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 35,155
Location: Somewhere in Colorado
20 Aug 2021, 3:53 am
20 Aug 2021, 7:58 am
Sweetleaf wrote:
ironpony wrote:
Hey sorry for not responding for a while. So far I have just been testing things with her and being patient but is that a good thing, or the way to go?
You don't have to be sorry, lol its your thread so you can post or not post in it however much you want.
That is not a bad way to go, but for sure you have to communicate. I mean is she at all into trying to be more dominating in sex or interested? If so perhaps she could get better which would require some patience. But if she just really isn't into it then well you may have to consider that you and her are not sexually compatible.
I mean I think for sure if you are invested in someone you should give it a good try. But it is also ok that sometimes people date and realize that they may not make a good long term couple.
But does she know he is talking about her on the net?
20 Aug 2021, 8:02 am
20 Aug 2021, 8:13 am
kraftiekortie wrote:
I'd rather have sex on equal terms myself.....or I might like to be slightly more assertive than she is.
A dominatrix type is my idea of a nightmare.....
A dominatrix type is my idea of a nightmare.....
I'd rather have sex than no sex.
Well, Strike that.
Let me put it another way.
I'd rather be with a woman than not be with a woman.
My genetic programming at work.
20 Aug 2021, 8:14 am
20 Aug 2021, 8:21 am
kraftiekortie wrote:
I'd rather have no sex than have a woman who wants to run things....
Equality is impotant important, yes.
20 Aug 2021, 4:52 pm
Sweetleaf
Veteran
Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 35,155
Location: Somewhere in Colorado
20 Aug 2021, 9:05 pm
20 Aug 2021, 11:42 pm
ironpony wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
I'd rather have sex on equal terms myself.....or I might like to be slightly more assertive than she is.
A dominatrix type is my idea of a nightmare.....
A dominatrix type is my idea of a nightmare.....
And this is the problem I have had is that even though I want a woman who is dominating in bed, in my experience all the women I have had that were like this were dominating in every other part of the relationship. It was kind of toxic.
But when I find a gf who is a really good gf, she has to be more prudish and demure in the bedroom as a result. Is it possible to have both worlds, or not really?
From my position, you are a poor little relationship rich boy.
You won't get much sympathy for your "plight" from me.
21 Aug 2021, 12:48 am
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