Dad Bods

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Yes I think rippling muscles and 6 pack abs can be a turnoff to a lot of women. My brother and I were bullied at school because were both really skinny. I filled out in my 20s and was a gym junkie. I was pretty naive but apparently I found out one of my sisters friends had a crush on me. When I volunteered to take photos at a church function I also overheard a group of teenage girls fighting in the auditorium with each other over which one actually knew me.

Alas I never took advantage of that window...

Often times, when we look at the world, even when using "our own eyes", we tend to only notice and focus on the parts that are relevant to us. Sort of like when you buy a new car, and start to notice all the other (that car) there are on the road. They were always there. You're just now noticing, cos it only just now became relevant to you. You're not gonna notice the hundreds of Hondas if you're only looking for Lamborghinis.

Very few of the couples I know, or see in daily life, are "like dating like". Most of them have some visible difference, in height, weight, shape, or "looks" in general. Big guys, thin girls. Thin guys, thick girls. Tall guys, short girls - short guys, tall girls. Very seldom do I see "like dating like" to the extent being implied - at least when it comes to appearance.

I DO see "like dating like", when it comes to personality, values, life experiences, hobbies, interests, passions, priorities or goals. "Looks", not so much. At least, that's what I spy with my little eye...

I find it interesting some of the most logical people on the planet (here on WP) would choose to ignore what is obvious

here's a basic premise of every psychology textbook
https://opentextbc.ca/socialpsychology/ ... ttraction/
Similarity: We Like Those Who Are Like Us
Research across many cultures has found that people tend to like and associate with others who are most similar to themselves

Here's what they say about physical attractiveness
the only important determinant of participants’ liking for their date was his or her physical attractiveness. None of the other characteristics—even the perceived intelligence of the partner—mattered.

And here comes the clincher - 443 women surveyed
https://bonytobeastly.com/wp-content/up ... or-men.jpg



I don't care if you disagree,....this is science and it also is my observation....

The guy on the right, hands down.

So, of those 443 women, 58% were “healthy weight” and 39% were “lean”? None of them were “obese”? And they just matched right up? Did those pictures happen to have the words on them when the women chose? Did they have to choose the best of the four?

Because for me, on your male graphic, just keep going to the right…. Actually, could we just take the overweight guy and slim him down without the workouts? He’s probably got about the right amount of muscle under there.

Yes, we like people who are like us - in the ways we consider important. So I suppose if we consider physical build to be important, we might work at having the physical build we like, and look for a similar build in a mate.

What is obvious to me is that you and I are not surrounded by similar couples. Although I will say that in couples our age and older, I do often see more physical resemblance than in younger couples - both fat or both average or thin. Probably due to years of eating the same meals and having similar activity levels. I know several people who got divorced and then diverged physically.

Except I am never going to be skinny and fortunately for me Dh wasn’t looking for skinny or trying to gain weight.

A skinny guy doesn’t keep me warm at night.

You are shifting the goal posts, Everyone starts to put on weight after they stop exercising, earning lots of money and take themselves out of the dating pool.

My wife and I have managed to stay right in the middle in our 50s.

Everyone?

Some people are slim but have never exercised.
Some people are slim because they don't earn ENOUGH money for lots of food.
Some people are slim so they can "stay in" the dating pool.
Some people are slim because they're ill.
Some people "put on weight" because of genetics even if they exercise
Some people "put on weight" because of medication even if they exercise

The guy on the left was me in my twenties, although I had better abs but poor pectoral muscles.

The guy on the right is me ( up until a year ago) after I couldn't play football anymore due to knee injuries and the medication I was on. I have now lost a lost 2 stones due to stress, but I have no muscle definition except for my calves

^


Good thing you have a big, strong heart either way.


*The guy on the left looks sticky to me.

^ You really do have rose-tinted glasses when it comes to me

The song title popped into my head and I was like, "What is that??"
I thought it was a poem.
I'm a wee bit high on heating oil.


(It's actually a Chris Hemsworth thing but who's counting?)

Almost forgot the emoji, for effect. ^

Ok maybe not everyone but you get the drift....

Probably no glasses at all...