Being Bitter Not Going to Help you Get a Woman

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Aridarr
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12 Feb 2008, 3:13 am

D1nk0 wrote:
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I'm going to ignore the rest of your post as to honour it with a reply would be an insult to your supposed intelligence.
:roll: :roll: :roll:


Aridarr- you know its true :wink: . However your reaction entirely predictable. Admitting it would make women look bad.

soujournertruth-you DO have a point that women generally dont like a**holes. But I was using that as a hyperbole. Its pretty OBVIOUS to me that a LOT of women actually do fall for Jerks. But moreover, NICE GUYS FINISH LAST!
What bugs me about the proponents of the original post is that gentemen reading it and the other posts supporting his conjecture is that some might be misled to believe incorrectly that women prefer nice guys; THEY DONT.


One thing I should point out; there is a vast difference between "being a jerk", and truly hating women. I was not contesting the fact that some women have poor taste in men (which is why I felt deep annoyance at your bringing up that point - quite irrelevantly, I thought); what I was referring to was true, bitter misogyny. I remember one man in this very forum expressing the opinion that all women deserve to be raped; another, comparing them to Nazis. That is the sort of behaviour I would discourage; playful obnoxiousness is irritating, but acceptable. :wink:

Hope that clears things.



Kezzstar
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12 Feb 2008, 5:55 am

Pugly wrote:
My positive attitude comes off as a tad goofy though... I don't think goofiness can ever be sexy... darn. Can ladies prove me wrong about this... :D


My bf is an absolute goofball and I wouldn't have him any other way :)

I'm guilty of being negative but it is natural to have doubts sometimes. Just try again!


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ToadOfSteel
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12 Feb 2008, 10:13 am

sojournertruth wrote:
?
Not meant to be funny.


If more women (especially among the NT population) valued honesty, I wouldn't be having all the relationship problems I'm having now...



Aspie_Chav
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12 Feb 2008, 10:27 am

Aridarr wrote:
what I was referring to was true, bitter misogyny. I remember one man in this very forum expressing the opinion that all women deserve to be raped; another, comparing them to Nazis. That is the sort of behaviour I would discourage; playful obnoxiousness is irritating, but acceptable. :wink:

Hope that clears things.




It must be that many of these aspies have a lot of NT in them. I don't know if it is a case to selebrate. If they was a racially pure aspie such as myself, there would be more analyses and less anger.
Image



ToadOfSteel
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12 Feb 2008, 11:55 am

Aspie_Chav wrote:
It must be that many of these aspies have a lot of NT in them. I don't know if it is a case to selebrate.

Here's my theory: Everybody (even NT's) have a level of autism (systemic) and NT (empathic) to themselves... aspies have more NT in them than full-out autistics, but not as much as bona fide NT's... It's like the theory that there's nobody that is 100% straight or 100% gay (although there may be 99.99% of either)...

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If they was a racially pure aspie such as myself, there would be more analyses and less anger.
Image

I used to be like that (all about analysis only)... but I believe that no real person is complete with just a spock element to their personality with no mccoy as a counterpoint...

Actually, come to think of it, Kirk, Spock, and Mccoy fill out the three freudian psychological components... Mccoy = id, Kirk = ego (big surprise there), and spock = superego...



sojournertruth
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12 Feb 2008, 1:22 pm

ToadOfSteel wrote:
sojournertruth wrote:
?
Not meant to be funny.


If more women (especially among the NT population) valued honesty, I wouldn't be having all the relationship problems I'm having now...


Ah, I understand. I should have been more clear: I meant 'honesty' as in not trying to be something that one is not, and not lying to one's partner; there's also a factor, though, of saying what we think when we think it that gets a lot of us in trouble. If humans were telepaths, we'd probably all kill each other.



ToadOfSteel
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12 Feb 2008, 1:36 pm

sojournertruth wrote:
Ah, I understand. I should have been more clear: I meant 'honesty' as in not trying to be something that one is not, and not lying to one's partner; there's also a factor, though, of saying what we think when we think it that gets a lot of us in trouble. If humans were telepaths, we'd probably all kill each other.


Learning to control what you say is important, but we also mustn't be afraid to tell the truth about certain situations. People who can't handle the truth are socially weak in my opinion...



yesplease
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12 Feb 2008, 2:18 pm

Aspie_Chav wrote:
If they was a racially pure aspie such as myself, there would be more analyses and less anger.
Image
Race has no consistent quantitative aspect, and is an illogical social construct. :wink:



sands
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12 Feb 2008, 2:26 pm

I must admit that I for one like honesty. It's a must have in a relationship for me. That being said when you are a NT and have a relationship with someone with Aspergers you have to give them time to regroup their feelings. When the person I like seems upset I try to look at the whole picture to see what is really going on. Then I give him awhile to be able to place his feelings. And then and only then do I ask for him to explain it to me. On the other hand I sometimes need the same treatment.


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vimster
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12 Feb 2008, 3:25 pm

Much as I hate to admit it I feel bitterness on a daily basis. However it isn't linked to a hatred of women. The bitterness and frustration are more a result of my lack of success in securing a partner. I've come to resent couples and all they stand for, trying to convince myself that the single life isn't so bad, but I fully realise that it is a futile atempt to justify my bile.

It takes an extraordinary amount of willpower to keep the bitterness at bay, the mask the frustration, lord knows I've tried. That's not an excuse for it, it's a very strong emotion and one that I can barely control as it is.



ToadOfSteel
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12 Feb 2008, 5:21 pm

vimster wrote:
Much as I hate to admit it I feel bitterness on a daily basis. However it isn't linked to a hatred of women. The bitterness and frustration are more a result of my lack of success in securing a partner. I've come to resent couples and all they stand for, trying to convince myself that the single life isn't so bad, but I fully realise that it is a futile atempt to justify my bile.

It takes an extraordinary amount of willpower to keep the bitterness at bay, the mask the frustration, lord knows I've tried. That's not an excuse for it, it's a very strong emotion and one that I can barely control as it is.

I think that's what most of the bitterness on the board is about... I, for one, know that such is the case for me... I have a 0% acceptance record, after all (and that doesn't mean I've tried; that would make my acceptance record undefined), so obviously the problem must be with me...



juliekitty
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12 Feb 2008, 9:38 pm

What on earth is a "racially pure aspie"?



NeantHumain
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12 Feb 2008, 9:47 pm

juliekitty wrote:
What on earth is a "racially pure aspie"?

Blond-haired, blue-eyed, fair-skinned, tall...with cheese.



Aridarr
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12 Feb 2008, 9:49 pm

NeantHumain wrote:
juliekitty wrote:
What on earth is a "racially pure aspie"?

Blond-haired, blue-eyed, fair-skinned, tall...with cheese.


With... cheese? You mean male?



yesplease
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12 Feb 2008, 11:01 pm

Hold the mayo! :o



D1nk0
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12 Feb 2008, 11:25 pm

I am person who is 100% INCAPABLE of blind faith. So If I am going to be hopeful then I have to have a TANGIBLE reason
for hope. So I would love to crawl out of my hardened shell of bitterness but ONLY if there is actually something waiting there for me. I have give SO MUCH MORE than Ive gotten back when it comes to people and Im f*****g TIRED of it. I just dont feel like giving anymore, its someone elses turn. I want something back, I want recognition, I want PROOF-then I'd be willing to lighten up and not be better anymore.