Asking a guy out/Telling him you like him

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SOME PEOPLE WILL JUST HOOK YOU UP WITH SOMEBODY. IF YOU SEEM NICE, THEY WILL WITH EITHER INTRODUCE YOU, PUT THEIR HAND IN YOURS, OR GIVE YOU A PEN AND PAPER TO WRITE DOWN THEIR PHONE NUMBER OR EMAIL ADDRESS. IT ALL HAPPENED TO ME -- IT CAN HAPPEN TO YOU. BUT IT WON'T HAPPEN WHILE YOUR SITTING AT HOME. INCREASE YOUR CIRCLE OF FRIENDS BY JUST SAYING HI TO EVERYONE THAT CROSSES YOUR PATH. IT'S FUN, BUT IF YOU LIVE IN A BIG CITY, SOME PEOPLE WILL JUST LOOK AT YOU AS IF YOU HAVE MISTAKEN THEM FOR SOMEONE ELSE. THEY ARE REALLY, THOUGH, STARVING FOR ATTENTION LIKE MOST PEOPLE. THE NEXT TIME YOU SAY HELLO TO THEM, THEY WILL RESPOND MORE FRIENDLY, BECAUSE THEY BEGIN TO BECOME MORE FAMILIAR WITH YOU. EVEN IF THEY ARE OF AN INFERIOR SEX, BECOMING THEIR FRIEND WILL ENABLE YOU TO MEET THEIR FRIENDS WHO ARE OF YOUR SOUGHT FOR GENDER. BE PATIENT, THIS COULD TAKE WEEKS, BUT IT ONLY WORKS THIS FAST IF YOU HAVE A SET SCHEDULE. SOMEONE YOU SEE IN THE MARKET AT 9:00 AM TUESDAY, WILL NOT LIKELY BE THERE AT 9:00 "PM" WEDNESDAY. KEEP A STRICT SCHEDULE TO MEET THE SAME PEOPLE, TO MAKE FRIENDS EVENTUALLY. THEY WILL WANT TO TALK TO YOU AFTER THEY SEE YOU MANY TIMES!

Now you know how every guy on the planet feels...



Capslock much?

Hi Patrick,

Typing with the caps lock on is like shouting online, it also makes it hard to read. Not sure if you knew that.

Yes, I find it to be an absolute brilliant method of distinguishing my voice from the message adjacent to mine. It is my couth technique for minding the feasible frustration of others in attempting to differentiate between the two. Do I think you are narrow-minded as a result of questioning my anti-Aspie empathetic behavior? -- of course not. Anyone with more than a miniscule of experience on this site, would know that the color-coding format cures the message contrasting dilemma. However, as my profile states, I did not have such a notion -- as the date of the aforementioned note and my membership would suggest. In other words, I am the new guy, and as the Japanese say, "The nail that sticks up, gets hammered down."

Hi Butterflair,

Yes, actually I learned about the tone of "all caps" in a business class a couple years ago. That teacher was one of the more recent individuals to enlighten me as to my Aspie status -- coincidently. I'm entering a doctorate program now, so don't tell my patients that I'm going against the grain! Actually, I only use it to wedge short replies into large bodies of messages. That way the reader can quickly determine where my input was. With this site, I did not know that my replies would be arranged to omit the necessity of my style. Can you smell my baby breath?

I wasn't sure and was trying to be helpful For me it's hard on the eyes and I wanted to read what you had written easier.

Doctorate program, what field of study is it for?

By the way, I smelled your baby breath a mile away. I'm pretty new here myself.

To stay on topic though, I don't see a problem with women asking men out. It sometimes makes it easier all the way around. Say what you mean and mean what you say.

Cyberman is spot on. If a guy is too shy to approach a girl out of the blue and ask her out for dinner and a movie, he's seen as "weak". Even if he makes the approach, is social, friendly, and has a good conversation, it is all for nothing because if he doesn't say "Want to go blah blah blah with me?" by the time he leaves, he's thrown into the "friendship circle" otherwise known as the "trash heap" (because even the best of friendships disintegrate when they find someone that isn't "weak" to be with). It's messed up, but such is life.

Best part is that guys can expect a rejection rate of about 90-95%, and girls continue to expect them to just take it in stride and keep asking (even though you suffer the effects as mentioned by someone else...distancing or awkwardness or such nearly always). I'd turn into an insensitive jerk as well with those kinds of odds against me (I already am, so I have nothing to turn into, which is nice).

In highschool I asked a guy out. He was this really popular, outgoing type, and nice and simple to be around. He had never been asked out by a girl before, always been the one asking. He thought it was sweet and charming that a girl asked him out, and we stayed together for six months.

I tend to think that women will not respect me unless I make the initiative, but it never lasts anyway. I have no trouble getting a phone number, but after the first phone call or date, they usually stop returning my calls. I guess nobody like Aspies. A few women have stayed with me for up to 8 months, and all said that I was the best lover by far, but something is driving them away. Maybe after I get my Ph.D. in Environmental Science, some women will be attracted to my money and not leave.

You don't want a women that is only attracted to you for your money.

Thank you, but would it be better if I remained alone? I have been that way for so long, and I feel as if I have exhausted all other strategies.

Yes. Better to be alone than live with a money-parasite.

I heard that women are attracted to the rich and the powerful. What if she knew that I earned a lot, but that I did not give her any?

Women are attracted to the rich and powerful because they see it as an opportunity to get all the expensive things they want. They know that lots of men will buy them stuff in hopes of earning their "affections." If the woman was only attracted to your wealth and you don't give her any, she would either leave you or try to trick you into letting her have some of it.

Actually, a lot of it is to the success part of it.

QFT. For most women, the 'friends zone' really is the trash heap, even if not consciously - by which I mean that from what I've observed most only truly value friendships with other women, hence is you're male and just friends then the connection is probably almost worthless to her - useful only when she wants to cry on your shoulder.

[quote="Rynok"]Best part is that guys can expect a rejection rate of about 90-95%, and girls continue to expect them to just take it in stride and keep asking (even though you suffer the effects as mentioned by someone else...distancing or awkwardness or such nearly always). I'd turn into an insensitive jerk as well with those kinds of odds against me (I already am, so I have nothing to turn into, which is nice).

What really annoys me is women that criticise a guy for being 'too chicken' to ask a certain girl out but who have never asked anybody out themselves in their lives. This is otherwise known as hypocrisy.
What do you do when you've asked out, and been rejected by, all the girls you know that you would even remotely consider dating? I'm not there yet, there's a girl I'll ask in a few weeks, but almost there - if she rejects me, then I will really be out of options.
Yep, women usually expect us to take rejection in stride, often ones that have never been rejected themselves. Apologies to women that have had the guts to ask someone out, and to those that are more considerate of guys even if they've never asked one out.