But it’s all about personality >.>

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I can save a few hundred per month but it takes so long that I'll be middle aged by the time I move in. I know people who bought their first home in their 20s. I know people younger than me who own their own house.

I feel horrible that they bought their first home at 26 and I'll do it at 46!

I keep thinking of all the money I'm wasting on rent. The sooner I buy a house the less money I waste.

Another complication is that I may need an expensive surgury. So far I've managed to save $11,000 but if I spend it on the surgury it will be back to square one and then it will be even longer before I buy a home. More years of wasting money on rent. And my young colleagues at work will be halfway paying off their mortgage before I've even started!

By the time we retire they may own two or three houses and I'll just be finishing paying off the one house.

Sometimes I think it's bad for me to be competitive like this. I'm almost tempted to just rent forever because that way I won't feel like I'm competing.

Australia could see a real estate market price crash and then it'll be easier for you to buy, and many of the people who bought before you may have overpaid & you both end up paying your places off at a similar time anyways - or you, even faster, if they actually get foreclosed on and have to start over again. Never know, anything could happen.

Same goes here in Canada, too, especially here in the Vancouver area. I no longer stress about buying & am ever more content to rent from family, or from others in the future, so long as I can hopefully keep my monthly expenses low. I think about what I could do with half a million dollars over time, what I value, what I want out of life etc.. and while, yes, I'd still need a roof over my head by paying rent the whole time, truly, if I can make the grade, I'd rather spend half a million dollars on another University education over the next decade or so than as a downpayment on a house only to then work like a dog to make the mortgage payments until I die. Or some other mix of spending/investing money.

I also think of stories of my brothers' travels around the world, about how many cultures have so many vibrant, happy, healthy people despite the fact that they have been renting their homes from the wealthy landowners for generations. Home ownership is not the be all and end all of life success. It's just A thing that people have traditionally done in our societies, but it isn't a requirement. Further, sometimes it makes more financial sense to rent and invest elsewhere, especially while waiting for a potential bubble to pop. Just keep doing your thing and saving money.. you might get an opportunity to buy later, and if not, oh well, you'll still have saved some money you can use in retirement.

It is bad for you to be competitive like this. It's also understandable, I did the same thing when I read that you won't be able to buy till your 46. I won't be in a position to buy when I'm 46 . We waste so much effort worrying where we are in comparison to everyone around us. We know it's stupid, but we do it anyway. I'm doing it less as I age because everyone's getting so far ahead of me that comparing is ridiculous.

It's recently been calculated that based on average incomes vs. home prices that it takes 29.47 years to save a downpayment for a home in Vancouver. (as per https://globalnews.ca/news/3863325/vanc ... n-payment/ ) Think about how ridiculous & overwhelming that is.. nearly an entire mortgage's timeline worth of time just to come up with a downpayment! That's why so many of us locals are like "ah well, f**k it, missed that boat." (or people are just fleeing town if they want to own.)

As for competing.. nothing wrong with a little healthy competition, even comparing yourself to others, but it's unhealthy if you obsess about it. What's much more valuable is that you compare yourself to who you used to be - and so long a you're improving, you're winning.

...Are you okay? Has something happened? You don't usually sound so pessimistic and negative.

Yes I thought this could happen too. For a while my goal was to save a downpayment in time for the real estate crash. It could happen.

But it's not the solution I thought it was because when housing prices get lower, the interest rates go up so I could be paying off a cheaper house at a much higher interest rate. That could mean the total payments are about the same

No I'm not ok. I've been worrying a lot lately

I know that I sometimes sound more optimistic and positive but I have mood swings. Sometimes I feel really happy and see my life abounding with opportunities and sometimes I feel really unhappy and see my life awash with regret and despair.

I can't really control it. Mood swings. They happen when they happen. I tried to tell one of my psychologists I'm bipolar and she said all of her patients think they're bipolar. I can understand why she'd get cranky at her patients for trying to self-diagnose. They don't have the expertise and may be prone to conformation bias.

True, but everything is cyclical. Prices can't skyrocket forever. They'll plateau or come down. And even IF you end up paying a higher rate and making a similar payment, high interest rates don't last forever, either. Eventually they would come down and your payments would be lower on the remaining mortgage.

Regardless, you know what else is true? There is NOTHING you can personally do about real estate prices or interest rates.. soooo, there is pretty much no reason to stress or worry about any of it. Just carry on living your life and if it works out that it makes sense for you to buy someday, then do it, if not, don't - the Sun is still going to rise and set every day and you're still going to work, eat, sleep, play etc so who cares?

Here is a thread by a nonverbal bride planning a wedding.
http://wrongplanet.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=357547
a REG: Nonverbal Wedding?

"Thanks for the response! I never thought of it that way. A lot of people and places get it backwards. They think that I’m “choosing not to talk” when in reality, I am saving what limited verbal abilities I do retain thus I’m choosing to talk. I am primarily nonverbal for a reason (actually several) including but not limited to experiencing severe physical
Pain when being verbal for as little as two minutes, emotional stress, and more. "

Well that doesn't sound so bad. Before you said low-functioning. I didn't imagine you meant high-functioning but nonverbal.