If you're 27 and never had a girlfriend, is it too late?

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Of course it will continue to grow. Lack of prior experience will keep holding us back no matter what we do. The only thing we can do is work as hard as possible to get ahead and not waste any sh***y opportunity we might still have, knowing normal and respectable people will keep increasing their advantage over us, and women will never have any reason whatsoever to be interested in us, except as buffoons. The only kind of social interaction we'll ever deserve is to be bullied and taken advantage of. And we should really make our best effort, because it'll only be worse otherwise.

We're screwed and rightly so. Thanks for reminding us the obvious.

The alternative is to choose to address your shortcomings and clearly maladaptive behaviors. To consider that maybe, just maybe, the problem is YOU and not the entire world.

Plenty of Aspies have jobs, live independently and find love. It's possible. There are Aspies who are NOT unemployed or unemployable, who don't live with mommy and daddy, who aren't 27 yo virgins who've never been in a date.

Being an Aspie doesn't doom ALL men. Why is it dooming YOU??

I seriously doubt you know what my behaviors are, let alone "clearly" see the maladaptive ones among them, but I'm all ears.



Of course it is. I thought I'd made it clear enough. Now what?



I never said it doomed all aspie men. And, no matter what we do, nothing will change the past, so the gap between us and respectable people will keep growing forever, as you already pointed out. I don't think anything from my last post needs to be changed, so I stand by it.

Sorry, but your post is very ambiguous. Is it a job that makes those aspies 'more dateable'? Or is it something else that makes them both employable and dateable? Education?

Can we please not get too personal? Addressing the poster instead of what has been posted is against the rules.

Point taken. My apologies.

If I was in my 30's and I had 20-something women hitting on me, okay, yes I will probably feel good about being in the present moment at the time, it's just because if I finally start having success with women in my 30's, i'll probably still feel a little bit depressed that I didn't have a girlfriend or enough success with women when I was in my late teens and all of my 20's, especially the 18-24 age range.

women who have dated me or messaged me tend to be younger. around the 19-24 range. It makes me a bit uncomfortable.

Dwelling on those thoughts is useless. Just do whatever it takes to make it a reality that you live independently and are as successful as possible in life by the time you're in your thirties. There's no hurry to anticipate what your perspective on women will be then.

Me too. I'll never have had success when I was 18 to 24 either, same as you, but there's nothing we can do about it. I think even if I got married I'd still be depressed about those years. There were opportunities when I was younger but they were blink-and-you-miss-it.

I'm still bitter. I see people who are 19 or 20, resent because they're younger than me, because they probably have a better life than me, because they're probably more mature than me. I see young couples, attractive and thin, I can't stand it. I think of my fat ass and all the fat girls I dated in my mid-20s.

I see 18 year olds, fresh-faced and wide-eyed, smiling, as they experience their first year of university. And I want blast them into the sun. I can't stand to see people that happy. When I was that age I spent all my time alone playing on a Super Nintendo emulator.

It's not their fault. It's my fault. I chose to be a recluse. I chose to be lazy. It's my fault. It's all my fault. That makes it even worse. Rage directed inwards is even worse. I hate those fresh-face youths not because they ever did anything to harm me but because they didn't make the mistakes I did.

As for my continuing education, I'm trying to better myself as everyone suggests but it's not going so well this semester. I find some of the material confusing. If I don't pass my courses I won't get a promotion and I'll be stuck in this job forever.

I can't even figure out how far I should take it. Can I get the job I want with just a DP? Do I need the BA? Maybe, maybe not. It would cost a lot more. It's a gamble. I could be putting myself into ten of thousands of dollars of debt for something I don't even need.

Would this job require a BA in the future? That's what you should asking yourself

Among nurses, there is a strong trend towards requiring RN's to have a BS. Many of them only have Associates Degrees (in the US) now.

My uncle says it doesn't require a BA but I suspect he may be too optimistic. I can't be certain.

I'm not even certain if developer would be best for me or if I should try for some other IT role.

Last edited by RetroGamer87 on 08 Aug 2015, 10:10 am, edited 1 time in total.

Why's that so bad?

What I would do:

Try to get the job with the DP. Then, you'll "have your foot in the door," so to speak.

If they require a BA later on, it's possible they might provide the money for you to get the BA.

This occurs in the US sometimes. The NYC Public School systems only requires a Bachelor's at the beginning--but one must be working towards a Master's, and get the Master's within 5 years. There is a program where the Public School System pays for the totality of your pursuit of the Master's.

exactly, the fact there is nothing I can do about it as to what you mentioned makes me want to give up

what about those who are almost or already in their 30s?