24 Jan 2018, 8:03 pm
goldfish21
Veteran
Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
24 Jan 2018, 8:29 pm
sly279 wrote:
goldfish21 wrote:
sly279 wrote:
Well I think the dates off now that she knows I don’t have a car.
While that’s a pretty big one you can’t rectify with the snap of your fingers, what it is is just one more thing to take note of that makes you a less attractive date.
Like retro said, why not start focusing on the things that make you “undateable,” and one by one, but by bit, change & improve them all?
Time is going to pass anyways. Your efforts will make a greater impact improving yourself than trying to start a movement to convince women to give “undateable,” guys a chance.
I’m not joking or trying to annoy you. I’m being completely serious. Diet/exercise & weight loss are a good start, but you’ve got a lot to work on still. Depression would be my number one focus if I were you. Once that’s under control, everything else will come easier.
Because they unchangable. I can’t work full time and I can’t afford a car because I can’t work full time.
Why is taking the bus seen as so bad, but in big cities most people use the Tran or subway?
There are few people that can afford to operate a car with only part time work, but it’s not impossible.
If you can’t currently work full time you need to ask yourself “Why? What constrains me from working full time?” and then work on improving whatever issues prevent you from working more until you’re able to work more rather than simply accept your situation as “unchangeable.”
_________________
No
for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.
24 Jan 2018, 8:33 pm
24 Jan 2018, 8:36 pm
goldfish21
Veteran
Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
24 Jan 2018, 10:31 pm
sly279 wrote:
goldfish21 wrote:
sly279 wrote:
goldfish21 wrote:
sly279 wrote:
Well I think the dates off now that she knows I don’t have a car.
While that’s a pretty big one you can’t rectify with the snap of your fingers, what it is is just one more thing to take note of that makes you a less attractive date.
Like retro said, why not start focusing on the things that make you “undateable,” and one by one, but by bit, change & improve them all?
Time is going to pass anyways. Your efforts will make a greater impact improving yourself than trying to start a movement to convince women to give “undateable,” guys a chance.
I’m not joking or trying to annoy you. I’m being completely serious. Diet/exercise & weight loss are a good start, but you’ve got a lot to work on still. Depression would be my number one focus if I were you. Once that’s under control, everything else will come easier.
Because they unchangable. I can’t work full time and I can’t afford a car because I can’t work full time.
Why is taking the bus seen as so bad, but in big cities most people use the Tran or subway?
There are few people that can afford to operate a car with only part time work, but it’s not impossible.
If you can’t currently work full time you need to ask yourself “Why? What constrains me from working full time?” and then work on improving whatever issues prevent you from working more until you’re able to work more rather than simply accept your situation as “unchangeable.”
I was born with autism, anxiety and adhd. That’s what prevents me from being able to work full time. So it’s unchangeable unless they invent the cure for thouse soon.
I’m going be disabled for my whole life. Lots of aspies are on disability working part time if they work at all. It’s not uncommon. You and retro are part of the minority
I was born with all the same afflictions and more. I refused to accept a lifetime of misery and chose to do something about it, several times over, until I found what worked for me - and still, I’m always open to learning and doing more to help myself health wise. You are free to do the same, sly. It’s your depression that constrains you from seeing that.
_________________
No
for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.24 Jan 2018, 10:51 pm
goldfish21
Veteran
Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
25 Jan 2018, 12:11 am
You’re choosing to ignore my posts and personal history. ~6 years ago I couldn’t work at all. This past Summer I worked 40-70h/wk plus sports and social life. The difference is I’ve treated what ails me with medicine. Therefor, I believe others can heal and improve their lot in life, too.
_________________
No
for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.
25 Jan 2018, 2:58 am
25 Jan 2018, 3:10 am
25 Jan 2018, 3:38 am
25 Jan 2018, 4:42 am
25 Jan 2018, 4:44 am
fluffysaurus wrote:
Peacesells wrote:
sly279 wrote:
fluffysaurus wrote:
Sly
Losing 30 lb is amazing, well done.
Has anyone else noticed that the supermarkets all have really good deals on all the stuff like chocolates and biscuits. They know this is when people try to turn over new leaves and they are intentionally trying to scupper everyone. I know this sounds paranoid but all the boxes of chocolates are half the price they were at Christmas.
Losing 30 lb is amazing, well done.
Has anyone else noticed that the supermarkets all have really good deals on all the stuff like chocolates and biscuits. They know this is when people try to turn over new leaves and they are intentionally trying to scupper everyone. I know this sounds paranoid but all the boxes of chocolates are half the price they were at Christmas.
I’m stil fat though. So it doesn’t matter. I gained some 4 pounds over holidays too. My family keeps bringing food , I need to just throw it away. I hate to be wasteful but. It being wasteful breaks my diet.
Chocolate is cause it’s freaking Vday soon
Half price is to get rid of Christmas stock before it goes bad. But sweet companies do benifit from us ststying fat and over eating. I miss cake, doughnuts, brownies, etc
I believe that a good part of getting thinner is taking one's responsabilities, so if you buy sweets blame yourself, not the companies for selling it at half price.
I don't eat chocolate because I'm a low sugar eater, there are whole isles in the supermarkets that I never go down. I also have very bad observation skills and yet I noticed that the chocolates were on the best offers on mass. These are not the Christmas leftovers (they've all gone super cheep but I expect that) this is the all year stuff with used by dates in 2019. eg matchsticks normal price £2 Nov price £1.25/£1.50 Dec price £2 now £1. Why, because this is when people try to brake their bad habits and they don't want that.
You're not helping him, being so blatantly indulgent. That is so lame. The people who own the supermarket can put the sweets wherever they like and sell it at low prices if they want, it's within their rights. Stop encouraging him to be spineless and let him take responsability for what he does, instead of saying s**t like "Duh, it's supermarket's fault if I am fat because they sell sweets at low prices". In the end that will help Sly more.
Last edited by Peacesells on 25 Jan 2018, 5:35 am, edited 1 time in total.
25 Jan 2018, 5:17 am
goldfish21
Veteran
Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
25 Jan 2018, 5:27 am
sly279 wrote:
fluffysaurus wrote:
I can't work full time because I can't be around other people all the time. All the jobs I have any chance of getting are with people. I've always worked part time but every job the hours have increased beyond what I can cope with so I have had no life. The answer for me is to work from home, I'm a writer and I can make things, but there's no help for this from anywhere. It is possible to get support for hundreds of different career paths for jobs I wouldn't be able to do. And before I'm told you have to make your own chances I have done that but it has increased the distance between me and everyone else not helped me to catch up.
I don't think working from home would be right for Sly because he's more social than I am but I do understand his frustration. He can make improvements to his life and I really don't think he'll find his 30's as difficult as his 20's but he's not going to suddenly find himself in fairyland with a change of attitude.
I don't think working from home would be right for Sly because he's more social than I am but I do understand his frustration. He can make improvements to his life and I really don't think he'll find his 30's as difficult as his 20's but he's not going to suddenly find himself in fairyland with a change of attitude.
Thanks for understanding.
It’s hard cause most people don’t get it but I never expected aspies to not get it.
It’s easy for them but hard for us, so they just think we lazy.
I’m already working a job most nts hate and refuse to do.
I doubt my 30s will be any better. Women get pickier as they get older. My best chance was when I was 20. Early 20s or 18/19 women are far less likely to care about mans income and life status. As they get older they go to college find better jobs, want to settle down and have a family.
This lady is fat, not that good looking, and just starting college at 26. So not exactly winner herself but rejected me for not having a car.
Bolded for BS. I call bs on this post because you're completely ignoring the fact that I've been sharing here for years, and in this very thread, that these things [i]used to be[i] hard for me, & now, generally, they aren't. I don't "just think you're lazy," I think you're depressed & thus incapable of accepting the possibility that you can get better if you decide to make an effort to do so.
_________________
No
for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.goldfish21
Veteran
Joined: 17 Feb 2013
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 22,612
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
25 Jan 2018, 5:38 am
Chronos wrote:
When I was a teenager, my "alpha" friend, who, at the time, was about as poor as I was, didn't have a job or a car, but he had a bicycle, and would ride 20 miles to his girlfriend's house. He eventually got a job at a fast food place, which wasn't full time, but he saved up a few hundred dollars and bought a 20 year old car from his neighbor, which had a milk crate for a passenger seat, needed new hoses, belts, an oil change, and had some problem with the carburetor. My friend knew nothing about cars when he bought this thing, but he also bought the repair manual for it, and borrowed some tools from the neighbor and set to work fixing it over the course of a number of months. I'm just telling this story to illustrate that it's possible for poor people to get cars. It's not without risk...the car could have turned out to be unfixable, but my friend wanted a car and took the risk of financial loss to get one.
Of course some individuals are unable to drive regardless. If one is such an individual then it's important that that person live in an area with public transportation that meets that individual's needs. If you are on a fixed income, you do not necessarily have to live with family. You likely qualify for a HUD or similar subsidized housing.
Of course some individuals are unable to drive regardless. If one is such an individual then it's important that that person live in an area with public transportation that meets that individual's needs. If you are on a fixed income, you do not necessarily have to live with family. You likely qualify for a HUD or similar subsidized housing.
I've had a couple brand new cars and a whole bunch of used ones ranging in price from free to $15k. The free one I inherited from my grandmother's estate. A few years ago I bought a honda civic hatchback for $700cdn & then another for $1100 cdn. I think I paid $900cdn for a different car. They don't last forever at that price point, but they're still way cheaper to own & operate than a brand new car - just not as reliable lol. A monthly transit pass here costs $172cdn. I was able to drive around in pos cars for around $400 per month & covered a LOT more ground in a lot less time than taking public transit. That's about as cheap as driving can possibly get here. Anyways, my point comparing super cheap cars to transit costs is that it doesn't really cost thaaaaaaaat much more to drive if you don't mind driving an ancient high mileage beater until it dies. Also, driving is quite expensive here (highest gas prices in North America usually, and high insurance prices, and more expensive cars) so it MAY be possible for sly to drive an ultra cheap car where he lives for the price of taking the bus here.
_________________
No
for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.25 Jan 2018, 8:34 am
Peacesells wrote:
fluffysaurus wrote:
Peacesells wrote:
sly279 wrote:
fluffysaurus wrote:
Sly
Losing 30 lb is amazing, well done.
Has anyone else noticed that the supermarkets all have really good deals on all the stuff like chocolates and biscuits. They know this is when people try to turn over new leaves and they are intentionally trying to scupper everyone. I know this sounds paranoid but all the boxes of chocolates are half the price they were at Christmas.
Losing 30 lb is amazing, well done.
Has anyone else noticed that the supermarkets all have really good deals on all the stuff like chocolates and biscuits. They know this is when people try to turn over new leaves and they are intentionally trying to scupper everyone. I know this sounds paranoid but all the boxes of chocolates are half the price they were at Christmas.
I’m stil fat though. So it doesn’t matter. I gained some 4 pounds over holidays too. My family keeps bringing food , I need to just throw it away. I hate to be wasteful but. It being wasteful breaks my diet.
Chocolate is cause it’s freaking Vday soon
Half price is to get rid of Christmas stock before it goes bad. But sweet companies do benifit from us ststying fat and over eating. I miss cake, doughnuts, brownies, etc
I believe that a good part of getting thinner is taking one's responsabilities, so if you buy sweets blame yourself, not the companies for selling it at half price.
I don't eat chocolate because I'm a low sugar eater, there are whole isles in the supermarkets that I never go down. I also have very bad observation skills and yet I noticed that the chocolates were on the best offers on mass. These are not the Christmas leftovers (they've all gone super cheep but I expect that) this is the all year stuff with used by dates in 2019. eg matchsticks normal price £2 Nov price £1.25/£1.50 Dec price £2 now £1. Why, because this is when people try to brake their bad habits and they don't want that.
You're not helping him, being so blatantly indulgent. That is so lame. The people who own the supermarket can put the sweets wherever they like and sell it at low prices if they want, it's within their rights. Stop encouraging him to be spineless and let him take responsability for what he does, instead of saying s**t like "Duh, it's supermarket's fault if I am fat because they sell sweets at low prices". In the end that will help Sly more.
I did not say that ANYWHERE! I simply recognised that loosing weight at this time is difficult, BECAUSE IT IS DIFFICULT. I know because when I was lost weight (3st 7lb) I didn't loose any weight during December or January but I did loose it all and have kept it off for several years.
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