Aspie Affection

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The_Face_of_Boo
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04 Jul 2010, 7:43 am

alex wrote:

aspie affection is currently unavailable due to a technical glitch. we're working on fixing it.

Please don't.

Ichinin
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04 Jul 2010, 7:50 am

Mark198423 wrote:

But from what I can see the purpose of the site is to give an alternate to those other dating sites, I'm sure there are very few aspies you've been linked to on the others so surely if everyone gave it a go you wouldn't be matched with the same old people!

Ok, so how can you garantee that i will find someone interesting to talk to? Its not like there are 1000's of Swedish girls there that i can choose to talk to, and i'm not wasting my time talking to already takens with bad self esteem, i'm not looking for new penpals/friends either, even if they would be willing to visit a few times and hang out.

I want a relationship, if the chances of finding such a thing is close to zero, then why bother registering? I do not believe in destiny, fate or anything really - I'm a tech/sciense guy and i put my trust in cold hard probability maths.

Lonermutant wrote:

They don't attend them because they only want simple, no-strings-attached sex with a woman. They know that most of the Aspie women they would meet at these meetups are either in a relationship with a nt man or they are totally asexual.

Tull.

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Lonermutant
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04 Jul 2010, 7:56 am

dynastus wrote:

Could you also be an aromantic?

Exactly.

sunshower
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04 Jul 2010, 8:03 am

Lonermutant wrote:

dynastus wrote:

Could you also be an aromantic?

Exactly.

What's an aromantic?

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Into the dark...

dynastus
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04 Jul 2010, 8:06 am

Lonermutant wrote:

dynastus wrote:

Could you also be an aromantic?

Exactly.

...
Because you don't want any relationships is not thanks to asperger but because you're an aromantic.
Most aspies are soulmate wanting guys or whatever,but these guys aren't aromantic.
Comparing yourself (an aromantic aspie) and aspies who can fall in love (romantic aspies?) is like comparing oranges to apples.

Edit for Sunshower:That is somebody who can't fall in love and doesn't have those feelings.They can still have sexual feelings but won't experience love and related feelings.

Mark198423
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04 Jul 2010, 12:30 pm

Ichinin wrote:

Obviously I can't guarantee anything of the sort, all I'm saying is that the more of us try - the more changes of being successful. Even people with less members in their home country would have more of a chance if this happened.

BigK
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04 Jul 2010, 12:56 pm

sunshower wrote:

Lonermutant wrote:

dynastus wrote:

Could you also be an aromantic?

Exactly.

What's an aromantic?

Someone who smells nice?

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Mark198423
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04 Jul 2010, 1:08 pm

BigK wrote:

sunshower wrote:

Lonermutant wrote:

dynastus wrote:

Could you also be an aromantic?

Exactly.

What's an aromantic?

Someone who smells nice?

That was what I thought I saw initially too! :lol:

Anke
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04 Jul 2010, 2:49 pm

Ichinin wrote:

I want a relationship, if the chances of finding such a thing is close to zero, then why bother registering? I do not believe in destiny, fate or anything really - I'm a tech/sciense guy and i put my trust in cold hard probability maths.

If that logic worked, why try anything? Since at the end we all have a 100% probability of dying either before or after our partners, even if we managed to pair up successfully? Yes I know we're Aspies but that also means we're clever enough to know the limits of logical thinking... If hard probability maths was limitless in its application, Aspies would already rule the world.

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Go for it.

Ichinin
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04 Jul 2010, 3:39 pm

Anke wrote:

It doesn't happen like *BAAM*, the process of getting the insight is a tedious long process in which you are worn down by all the dating crap and you get to the sorry pessimistic state in where i am. I do not stop eating because there is a 100% chance that i'll die some day, there are other things that i would like to enjoy, i.e. i am looking forward to Fallout - New Vegas.

It's the process of dating that has gotten to me and i feel really worn down and every time i think of it i get this empty feeling on the inside - that's why i stay away from it all. For the same reason, i do not place my hand on a hot plate just because i like BBQ.

If YOU have been on a datingsite and had 573476124876234864398743 relationships as a result of that, congrats to you! You should know that it does NOT work for everyone - being loved is not a universal human right, its a privilege for some people that believe that everyone can be happy just because they won the bloody love lottery.

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Anke
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04 Jul 2010, 7:42 pm

Ichinin wrote:

I can see your frustration. Yes, online dating is soul-destroying. For lots of reasons. Very often (depending on where you live) it's considered an act of desperation and nobody who considers themselves cool would be seen dead on one. Logic also says that if there _are_ good people, finding them is going to be a 'needle in haystack' operation. There's the need for a thorough screening process. Then, thirdly, logic also says that if you go meet someone with the sole objective of checking them out for a potential relationship, it's the least romantic setting you could imagine, so the likelyhood for something to develop is... not great.

However. Have you done absolutely everything within your power to make it work? (see my post on page 4 of this thread) One thing dating sites are good for (and after all, we should appreciate that we have them, they are _much_ better than lonely hearts ads in a paper!) is practice. Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome is not logical is it? So change stuff around. Present yourself differently. Take all the variables and play with them. (don't play with ppl's feelings tho...)

Once you've done that, there's always the chance you get so good that people start sending you on blind dates with their female friends isn't it?

Keep smiling

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Go for it.

Ichinin
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04 Jul 2010, 8:13 pm

Anke wrote:

However. Have you done absolutely everything within your power to make it work?

Yes. I've been on countless datingsites, i've tried being open minded and i have gone out with girls that i sort of were "closed off" to before, but there is nothing out there for me. And i'm not gonna turn gay or become a monk!

Quote:

(don't play with ppl's feelings tho...)

Just a friendly question: You do realise that this is an aspie forum and not a sociopath forum?

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euphoria_revisited
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11 Oct 2010, 11:05 pm

It seems the "quote button" is broken on this thing as well. Anyway can someone please tell me why ican't wink or send anyone any messages on Aspieaffection when its a brand new free membership. I am afraid this is running out in5 days and if this is all they let you do now, then can imagine how bad it would be then. Are there any other sites that are free to communicate, send messages, wink, etc. Way too many sites are greed and more greed.

euphoria_revisited
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11 Oct 2010, 11:06 pm

Yasmine
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12 Oct 2010, 3:14 am

Ichinin wrote:

Anke wrote:

(don't play with ppl's feelings tho...)

Just a friendly question: You do realise that this is an aspie forum and not a sociopath forum?

Could have fooled me.

Laz
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12 Oct 2010, 4:14 am

Yasmine wrote:

Ichinin wrote:

Anke wrote:

(don't play with ppl's feelings tho...)

Just a friendly question: You do realise that this is an aspie forum and not a sociopath forum?

Could have fooled me.

Ah touche

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