Stereotypes in L&D forum.

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Stop making excuses for yourselves, just try and fix the problem. One of my problems is being a whiny whiner, and i'm trying to improve.

Last edited by hale_bopp on 18 Apr 2011, 7:53 am, edited 1 time in total.

You seem like an embodiment of scruffiness - no wander why KeyMaker is all over you.

I couldn't agree more - "women not putting enough effort into their appearance" is one of the biggest jokes I've seen in a while. It would be better if people of both genders would put LESS effort into appearance and focus more on some less superficial values.

Meow! I saw him first! He's mine, keep your hands off.

This.

Anyone who believes autistics are more logical than non-autistics should be sent to this sub-forum as a figurative slap in the face.

Seriously.

I agree with 1, since some woman have glandular problems and I can understand that some woman are naturally big (I wouldn't say obese unless they eat too much) and can be happy with themselves at the weight they are...and they do get guys who may or may not be of similar weight as they love their personality.

Now for the disagreement (nothing to do with being a guy either), some girls (not all) can be just as guilty at doing the exact same thing to dudes so to say that a comment is sexist can be incorrect if a woman says the exact same comment about guys "not putting in effort".

I can see both sides of the argument and each gender can forever argue the fact that they have it harder or not....but at the end of the day, both parties are to blame, which gets everyone no-where...the way forward is to address each genders flaws, agree with what is the true answer to why we think like this...and hopefully, can change the mentality of this together.

They are still logical, it's just that some kinds of logic are more anchored in reality than others.

Is there another Venus retrograde on? I don't expect to inspire such things under normal conditions.

I think i have more hope of being interesting in this manner rather than the other. I avoid to much activity as i find it very stressful.

(1) Very, very, few women (or men) were obese in the US 50 years ago. So the dramatic rise since then IS almost entirely down to lack of discipline in an affluent environment (eating junk and being inactive), and not things that are 'beyond one's control'. I don't know whether it's most women (i.e. more than 50%), but many, many, women do have themselves to blame for not being sufficiently attractive to men.

(2) Men are biologically 'programmed' to look for fertile women (as it makes no sense, from an evolutionary perspective, for them to mate with infertile women, obviously). Fertile means young (and beautiful - youth is associated with beauty).

Women are biologically 'programmed' to select the man (from those who are interested) with the most superior genes (as nature wants the best genes to surive, so that the human race becomes less imperfect with each generation).

THIS is why men desire beautiful, young, women, and women desire intelligent/accomplished men. I'm not telling you the way I want it to be - just the way it is. Nature made the rules, not me.

So, yes, some men need to put more effort into their education/careers to attract women, but it's not always easy for a man (especially in this economy) to earn enough to satisfy a successful woman (even if he's smart). I accept that not every woman can be Angelina Jolie, but there's no excuse for being 30 pounds overweight, or not putting in a basic amount of effort (assuming you want a man).

And please don't call me a troll because I disagree with you. Otherwise I might think you're just resorting to name calling because you've ran out of intelligent arguments.

Human mating is far, far more complex than that. It has been since the dawn of sentience. What motivation would two members of the same sex have to form life-long bonds? Non-sentient animals do it too. You may say it's pollution or an evolutionary self-destruct mechanism, but there's no way of knowing if it existed before humans started polluting the earth. It does now, and that's what counts in this context.

That is your opinion. However, obesity researchers say this:

Obesogenic environments and behavior have the potential to account for the acute rise in the prevalence of overweight and obesity that the world is currently experiencing.

However, one should not omit biology from the discussion. A large number of biological factors have been implicated in animal and human studies. Common biological correlates of weight gain or obesity include low resting metabolic rate, low thermic effect of food, low lipid oxidation rate, high levels of adipose tissue lipoprotein lipase activity, low rates of lipid mobilization, abnormal biology of leptin and other hormones, poor regulation of appetite and satiety, and low skeletal muscle oxidative potential. Moreover, many genetic studies have concluded that there is in our genome a latent predisposition to achieve positive energy balance for long periods of time. Several lines of evidence support the contentions that there are individual differences in the predisposition to gain weight and that genetic variation has much to do with the risk of becoming obese, particularly the risk of severe obesity (6).

Source: Agurs-Collins and Bouchard, Gene-Nutrition and Gene-Physical Activity Interactions in the Etiology of Obesity, Obesity (2008) 16, S2–S4; doi:10.1038/oby.2008.510.

Ergo, you are, without cause, blaming women for something over which they, at best, have minimal control. Researchers admit the existence of so-called "obesogenic environments" which include overreliance on cars, lack of sidewalks, prevalence of sugary soft drinks, sedentary pastimes, etc, but do NOT place blame on individuals for living in such environments, especially given the contribution of genetic and biochemical factors which *interact* with them.




Are you *really* claiming we are just "programmed"? I can agree with this to some degree, but it doesn't account for the great variety of preferences...there are men who prefer overweight women, for example. Some like them almost anorexic. Those I have had relationships with have vastly preferred intelligent women and have not at all enjoyed the company of airheads, no matter what their breast size. Dumb men bore the hell out of me, and I can't imagine why an intelligent guy would want to spend more than a couple of minutes with a dumb woman.



LOL...ran out of intelligent arguments...see above. I wondered if you were trolling because you were expecting women to put effort into something so shallow as pleasing men's eyes, while not expecting men to put effort into something as tangible as career success. That seemed, well, trollish to me.

~Kate

I wonder how many people who frequent L&D would be in favor of a Logan's Run type reproduction/relationship system.

The vast majority of people behave as I've described above. Of course the human race has plenty of individual variation, as the development of a human being isn't an exact science. Homosexuality is a unintended variation (like Autism). People are gay because, in the womb, they received extreme doses of particular hormones, e.g. gay women received far more testosterone than average, which wired their brain in an atypical fashion. Of course it doesn't matter whether someone is straight or gay, but the presence of a fairly small number of gay people in the general population (about 10%) doesn't make any difference to what I've written. Nature wants us to mate in a particular way (men seek fertile women, women select genetically superior men), and, by and large, that's what we do. Just because we've built a civilized society DOESN'T mean we aren't subject to nature's reproductive laws - like every other animal.

- I'm not just blaming women for being obese. I'm blaming everyone. That research (which is just one opinion) is drivel. People can choose HOW they respond to their environment. Of course there's more junk food today, but you don't have to eat it. And even if you have a sedentary job you can still hit the gym. Pretty much everyone I know who's obese only has themselves to blame. I was overweight once (though not severely), and it was my fault for overeating and not burning enough calories. I can't blame KFC or the chair I sat on in the office. I'm sorry if you (or someone close to you) has a weight problem. I'm not trying to be cruel, but I can't say something that I don't believe is true.

- There isn't all that much variation. Very, very, few men would prefer an overweight woman. Settle for, maybe, but not prefer. In fairness, you make a valid point re. intelligence. Intelligence is something that the human race has developed since primitive times, so that is an additional factor in sizing up a potential mate. Intelligent people of both sexes don't generally marry dumb people. So, yes, an intelligent man will consider a woman's intelligence IN ADDITION TO (but not instead of) more primitive desires.

- I've already covered men putting more effort into career success.