How do the older members (30+) cope with singleness?

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I was gonna say, it depends what she means by 'quirky'. Geeky and atypical; if you're clicking with her you might be a pair of bookends. If its 'Wack you in the back of the head with a 2x4 like Hacksaw Jim Duggens out of nowhere' type quirky though yeah, I'd avoid.

I was just reading more of a book on the topic of singledom today and there's actually a Quirky Alone movement, webesites, forums, pretty much which sounds like its dedicated to guys and girls who are both a bit eccentric and who can't bring themselves to date just for the sake of dating. I'm seriously thinking about looking into seeing what they've got, although I'll keep my autonomy and personal info just to be sure I won't be finding myself in something like the Midnight Express criminally insane ward.

I preempted her attack by not owning a rabbit.

Yeah me too man but it's not really ME who would become extinct, it will be my genes. My genes will not be passed on to the next generation.

Oh and btw, I am a strong believer in the afterlife. However I could be wrong though and there is simply no afterlife.

Last edited by Tom5 on 21 Mar 2012, 9:35 am, edited 1 time in total.

Nice, I can only imagine.

Thanks for the welcome.

And yes, I have tried dating a few that don't have the shingle. Since I have been working in colleges though for the last twelve years, and I spend a lot of time reading about the academic community, when they have no sense of what I'm talking about, the communication factor breaks down. It's hard enough communicating to many NTs (or even some others on the autism spectrum), without adding a substantial element like this to the mix. I live in an area where most people that could have higher degrees, move away after graduating from high school, unless they are going into engineering, nursing, education or petrochemical work. All of those except for the education leave me going and the education area is where I work (I'm not a professor).

I liked having someone to dote my affections on... to hold, cuddle.... someone to show my love to and occasionally receive back.

Pity that after 10+ years she decided she wanted more money and "beefcake" instead.

Being alone after being married and with two wonderful boys... the last 4 years have been devastating and I'm surprised I'm still converting oxygen to moisture-laden carbon dioxide.

I'm 50. I've been married. It didn't last long, but that was more about mutual unawareness than it was about being autistic, (didn't know I was autistic at the time anyway). I've changed a LOT since then, especially around relationships and my relationship skills.

I'm not currently married. I have two long term committed relationships. I think of myself as single and they think of me as single also. But I'm poly, so there's nothing to stop me from developing new relationships and I do that from time to time, (although never fast enough to keep me happy).

Saturn return was significant for me. (That's an astrology thing). Basically, in the time around 28.5 years old, there are some significant developmental changes in pretty much everyone. Lives change significantly. Before that, relationships in my world were more like the weather, something over which I had no control and only nominal participation. After that, (my marriage and divorce were then, and I discovered things I'm not allowed to discuss here), I actively valued and appreciated my relationships considerably more and I have worked diligently for nearly 20 years to develop those skills. And I have.

I'm still interested in finding a longer term, live-in, life partner. I'd like to coparent a kid too, although I would prefer to have a partner than to do it alone. And I never have enough friends, or (things I'm not allowed to talk about), or (other things I'm not allowed to talk about).

Having the relationships I do have seems to make my life better. But yes, there are times when I very much, desperately wish for some other things.

I don't understand why girls don't like the kind of guy I am. But I am not going to worry about it. I have porn.

I don't mind being single because I have been single my whole f*****g life so I'm kinda already used to living on my own. Also there are photos and videos of beautiful women and beautiful actresses all over the Internet which I enjoy watching.

Something else that's ever-present and never seems to leave me is the awareness that I'm as cold as a wall and that there's no one who I'd even show love back to. I could be 20, 30, 40, what difference does it make at that rate?