How to marry a man in 3 months

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BlueMax
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31 Jul 2012, 11:27 am

ArrantPariah wrote:
There is also the classic Nancy Reagan trick: get pregnant, and then make him feel obligated to marry you.


[From the Ronnie & Nancy Show] "Oh Ronnie, I still remember the night you proposed.... *sigh* You took me in your arms, shook me violently and said, 'What do you mean it's positive?!?'"



Toadette
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31 Jul 2012, 1:30 pm

NTAndrew wrote:
I would be extremely reluctant to enter into one of those relationships. I would get the feeling the person was marrying me for my citizenship. A man I know who was born in Vietnam and became a citizen in the US met a woman on one of his visits to the old country. He brought her over, married her, and she got her citizenship papers started. One day, without warning she disappeared. Soon after that he received divorce papers. She knew exactly how long she had to stay married to him to reap the benefit of his citizenship. (We called the INS and everything she did was legal). Word got back to this guy (the Vietnamese community is small and word travels fast) that now she had legal status, she was bringing her boyfriend over from Vietnam so that they could live the American Dream together. A cautionary tale, for those considering going abroad for a mate.


Wow, so heartless... I can't understand how anyone could do that.



ArrantPariah
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31 Jul 2012, 2:13 pm

BlueMax wrote:
ArrantPariah wrote:
There is also the classic Nancy Reagan trick: get pregnant, and then make him feel obligated to marry you.


[From the Ronnie & Nancy Show] "Oh Ronnie, I still remember the night you proposed.... *sigh* You took me in your arms, shook me violently and said, 'What do you mean it's positive?!?'"


This would probably be less effective in Russia, where most fetuses are aborted anyway.

I think that it still works in America, where a fellow would expect to be hit with child-support payments anyway. Although it didn't work for Bristol Palin.



ArrantPariah
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01 Aug 2012, 7:44 am

Toadette wrote:
NTAndrew wrote:
I would be extremely reluctant to enter into one of those relationships. I would get the feeling the person was marrying me for my citizenship. A man I know who was born in Vietnam and became a citizen in the US met a woman on one of his visits to the old country. He brought her over, married her, and she got her citizenship papers started. One day, without warning she disappeared. Soon after that he received divorce papers. She knew exactly how long she had to stay married to him to reap the benefit of his citizenship. (We called the INS and everything she did was legal). Word got back to this guy (the Vietnamese community is small and word travels fast) that now she had legal status, she was bringing her boyfriend over from Vietnam so that they could live the American Dream together. A cautionary tale, for those considering going abroad for a mate.


Wow, so heartless... I can't understand how anyone could do that.


I think that most Vietnamese men abroad ask their parents (or other relatives) back in the Old Country to select a bride for them. Probably they failed to perform an adequate background check.



NTAndrew
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01 Aug 2012, 10:49 am

ArrantPariah wrote:
Toadette wrote:
NTAndrew wrote:
I would be extremely reluctant to enter into one of those relationships. I would get the feeling the person was marrying me for my citizenship. A man I know who was born in Vietnam and became a citizen in the US met a woman on one of his visits to the old country. He brought her over, married her, and she got her citizenship papers started. One day, without warning she disappeared. Soon after that he received divorce papers. She knew exactly how long she had to stay married to him to reap the benefit of his citizenship. (We called the INS and everything she did was legal). Word got back to this guy (the Vietnamese community is small and word travels fast) that now she had legal status, she was bringing her boyfriend over from Vietnam so that they could live the American Dream together. A cautionary tale, for those considering going abroad for a mate.


Wow, so heartless... I can't understand how anyone could do that.


I think that most Vietnamese men abroad ask their parents (or other relatives) back in the Old Country to select a bride for them. Probably they failed to perform an adequate background check.


That is entirely possible.



hyperlexian
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01 Aug 2012, 1:23 pm

ArrantPariah wrote:
AspieOtaku wrote:
*hides underneith the radar to avoid being brought into a marriage so soon* Nobody's going to tie me down muahahaha


It does seem that, in general, women are more interested in marriage at an earlier age than men.

There is also the classic Nancy Reagan trick: get pregnant, and then make him feel obligated to marry you.

in the nations with the best level of equality between men and women in all or most measures, the age of marriage tends to be equal as well. in countries where the track record isn't so great, there is a bigger age disparity between men and women in the age of marriage.


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ArrantPariah
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02 Aug 2012, 7:03 am

hyperlexian wrote:
ArrantPariah wrote:
AspieOtaku wrote:
*hides underneith the radar to avoid being brought into a marriage so soon* Nobody's going to tie me down muahahaha


It does seem that, in general, women are more interested in marriage at an earlier age than men.

There is also the classic Nancy Reagan trick: get pregnant, and then make him feel obligated to marry you.

in the nations with the best level of equality between men and women in all or most measures, the age of marriage tends to be equal as well. in countries where the track record isn't so great, there is a bigger age disparity between men and women in the age of marriage.


Do you have any references to back that assertion up?



hyperlexian
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02 Aug 2012, 8:36 pm

yep. it looks like no researchers have compiled this information, but here is a sample of some countries which i put together myself.

the rank after each name is the United Nations Gender Gap rating.
http://reports.weforum.org/global-gender-gap-2011/

the 2 numbers after it are the average age of first marriage for men and for women of that nation.

in brackets, i included the numerical difference in age, then expressed it as a percentage of the man's age.

Quote:
Iceland (rank #1) 34.3 32.1 (2.2 years, 6.4%)
Norway (2) 33.4 31.1 (2.3 years, 6.9%)
Ireland (5) 32.1 30.4 (1.7 years, 5.3%)
New Zealand (6) 29.2 27.3 (1.9 years, 6.5%)
South Africa (14) 28.9 27.1 (1.8 years, 6.2%)
United States (16) 28.4 26.5 (1.9 years, 6.7%)
Argentina (28 ) 25.6 23.3 (2.3 years, 8.9%)
Russian Federation (43) 26.1 23.3 (2.8 years, 10.7%)
Croatia (50) 29.7 26.8 (2.9 years, 9.8%)
Italy (74) 32.8 29.7 (3.1 years, 9.4%)
Albania (78 ) 27.7 22.4 (5.3 years, 19.1%)
Vietnam (79) 26.2 22.8 (3.4 years 13.0%)
Kenya (99) 26.3 21.6 (4.7 years, 17.9%)
Guatemala (112) 27.5 24 (3.5 years, 12.7%)
India (113) 26 22.2 (3.8 years, 14.6%)
Pakistan (133) 26.3 21.8 (4.5 years, 17.1%)
Chad (134) 24.1 18.0 (6.1 years, 25.3% )


i can't speculate on the reasons behind it as it is only a correlation and not a cause/effect thing. also, many countries don't fit the pattern totally, as you can see.


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ArrantPariah
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03 Aug 2012, 5:03 pm

I think that a lot more single women who are 25 are more anxious about their status, compared to men of the same age.

In all of your examples, women are younger than men.

It is interesting that in a lot of European countries, people are postponing marriage until they are well into their thirties.