rude women?

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My standards for rude men and rude women do not differ. However, I'm female. When a woman interacts with a man, she generally walks a fine line. It's not uncommon for men to interpret what women would consider just being polite, as romantic interest. To counter this, some women intentionally make themselves more cold when interacting with men, and may unintentionally come across as rude.

I have to agree with parts of that. I have myself problems with all that "reading and talking between the lines" so i often dont recognize when people try to communicate me something "not so directly" and I also do get in situations. when people tell me, that my behaviour would mean things to other people, that i didn´t want to communicate. After some weird situations I think for myself its best to be truly honest, because otherwise it leads to misunderstandings, hurting me, but also hurting other people, what i do not want.

So there was a hobby club, where lots of male were due to the hobby (Pen and Paper Roleplaying). So I am used to having male friends since i was a small kid, because most of my hobbies are more common with males, so I didnt think much about it and hang out with the guys just as i was used to it. With two of them I had lots of fun and from my oppinion we became friends and also did lots of other activities like swimming and so on. I was shocked, when I found out, that this two were thinking and also others were thinking i would be flirting with them and that because of that they were in love with me, trying to get a relationship. I really couldnt understand it, because they knew that i had a boyfriend so I never came to think, that anyone would be thinking i was trying to flirt, because I did not understandt why i should want to have other boyfriend, when I actually do have one. So for me, if I am unhappy with an relationship I end it, and as long as I am happy in an relationship I dont need another one, so why should I want to start another one? O_o

So everyone told me, that it would have been totally obvious that these two were in love with me and trying to get an relationship, while I just thought we were just having fun as friends. Also many others told me, that it had seemed to them, as if I was flirting with them by my own, being interested in their hobbies, meeting with them at home, nightswimming and so on... For me this were just things, i do with my friends at home the same way, just that they know me since i am a child.

In the end it lead to a situation where two friends, who I really appreciated, were hurt because of the misunderstanding and the friendship also did get a crack. So I was sad and my friends were sad, because of this. If I just had stated it from the first moment on, that I really do appreciate spending time with them, but have absolutely no interest in an relationship, maybe we still could be friends, but i thought that it would be done with the fact of me already having a malefriend.

I accept, that it might seem rude to some people that are not used to getting honest facts, and that there are many situations where NT-rules tell us to say such things indirect. Problem is, i seem to be too dumb to do so and i hardly recognize it if people are talking with me in this way. -.-

Im only rude to people if they deserve it. Like some of my co workers. and that 19 year old female gym employee.
and I have no idea what patronising means

Patronising means talking down to a person, as if you know better.

Some people are difficult to reject.

I'd advocate being honest, however some believe the in giving a harsh response, or the runaround would lead that person not to desire them.

With the amount to resentment on here, really it is no worse. I just personally think than honesty is more effective, and more useful in this situation.

However take with a pinch of salt what they say about you. They are only making a subjective assessment based on the particular situation, It is all subjective.

People experience shame and embarrassment, the quicker you can get out of that an move on the better.

Getting hung up on this mean you really don't get it. You are no better than them.

Men are pretty much perfect.