Hot people are ugly.

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(listens carefully )

This doesn't seem to be a common criterion. And muscles are important to woman who want their boyfriend/husband to do gardening for them...

I tend to find a lot of women guys reject to be fairly attractive as well, and also possess fairly low standards of beauty as others have said. Once you're past that "minimum requirement" anything more is just a bonus.

However, I'm also still quite cynical of humanity and always tend to assume the worst. I would certainly suspect that most NT's think as I described.

Hot people are ugly??
What next, fat people are skinny, rich people are emotionally poor, cats are dogs etc.

I say live and let live. There is ALWAYS going to be someone better than you. Sometimes there will even be a lot of people better than you. But there will also always be someone worse than you. Attempting to see traits in others you'd secretly like as bad, will not automatically make everything about you good.

@JanuaryMan it doesn't have to be "traits you'd secretly like." I think in this context "hot" is being used for sterotypes of what attractivess is. I genuinely am not attracted to the people who get tend to get the most attention for their face and body, because I don't like big muscles, a giant rack, tanning, long hair, which is what the media peddles as hotness. I'm not jealous of those people and don't think they're better than me. I know I'm not perfect, I just apparently don't agree with the majority of people about what's attractive, and that sounds like what most people are saying.

And yeah, I'd say most rich people are pretty emotionally poor, but that's another topic

It is, but isn't saying things like that in a way just trying to comfort our own lack of wealth? Call me a realist but I'd rather live with the harsh reality of there are hot people, and I'm not one of them, and there rich people, and I am unlikely to ever be one of them either.

I live in an apartment.

No, not really. The people I've known with a lot of money generally got that way because 1) they came from rich families where they get handed everything on a platter or 2) they cared enough about financial success to spend a huge chunk of their life struggling to earn/take more than others (or both.) Neither of those scenarios tends to come along with a vast wealth of emotional intelligence and strong relationships. I don't need comfort from the fact that I'm not rich because I'd probably hate myself if I were. I'm happy to just have enough to live simply on. I suppose someone with a more conservative outlook on human nature would question that statement, but that outlook would be very different from my own.

Now, regardless of the merits, there's no denying that there are wealthy people and impoverished people in the world. Because those terms indicate a specific measure of financial worth. Not everyone will be rich and I definitely won't be. But "hot" only means what we decide it means, and society/the media/whoever have decided it means a certain type of person but who isn't really the favorite of everyone.

We get sold on the idea that certain traits make us objectively "better" and more attractive when it's not true. I'm not just settling for a skinny guy with glasses and no muscles; that's what I *prefer*. To me that's "better," but I don't think people who disagree with that are just in denial about the fact that they wish they look like him. I don't think there's necessarily anything disingenuous about rejecting stereotypical "hot"ness. It's really what I'd expect on a board like this populated by people who fall outside the mainstream.

puddingmouse I know my way all around a computer, and I'll also tend your garden any day of the week

I've been tending it DIY for too long to know what to say!

There are some interesting turn-ons here... scars, "black with natural hair", lack of money...

That last one does puzzle me a bit. Surely it's not the money itself that turns you off, but something about the personality of the "rich" person? Whatever that is, is it really exclusive to those who have money? If you met a guy/girl that you liked and then found out accidentally that they were rich, but nothing changed about them (perhaps they didn't even know you found out), would that really make you like them less?

RudeGoldbergMachine mentions "low emotional intelligence" - so maybe that's the real turn-off, not the money?

Boy, are you in the right place! I'm pretty sure there are many people on WP that understand computers, but have little in the way of muscles and money.

Hehehe me too. When my husband and I started dating, he'd stare at my knees. It was so cute! I'd hit on him more just to make him uncomfortable.

Aawwww

People who prefer all these body types, etc... without really looking at a person's character are going to be ALONE for a really LONG, LOOONG time....possibly forever.
Suppose you DO find that "so much preferred" body type - what makes anybody think they'd be interested in you. (Don't take this comment personally). That type of thinking isn't realistic.
You have to look for somebody that is COMPATIBLE with you in character.

@puddingmouse we can all use a hand sometimes!

@RightGalaxy I tend to agree. But then I am demisexual (though you wouldn't know it from my... intimate history) so maybe I'm biased I suspect that people without much sex/relationship experience assume that specific physical traits are more important than they are, because they don't know how much caring about someone or intellectual/emotional attraction affects how you see someone.

On the contrary, I'm sure people with good looks that seek out good looks tend to have plenty of sexual experience. Though, gotta agree that their relationships must suck.

You have a good point. I still think that people who aren't experienced in actual partnerships believe appearance is more crucial than it is. Some of that's natural... even I would find it kind of disturbing if my guy became a body-builder and developed a six-pack and did tanning. But I would still love him. I also agree, though, that there are plenty of shallow people at the other end of the dream pool, and that their relationships are probably utter crap and last a couple months until the sex gets boring and they realize they have nothing in common.