"You Just Haven't Met The Right Person Yet (But You Will)"

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feel sorry for my Aunt and her new husband at times, well it's the first time she's ever been married, they are both the same age and met eachother at age 49, they sometimes say they wish they met 20 years earlier.

Being miserably lonely your entire life only to find love at age 70, 60, or even 50, is probably not worth it -you don't have enough time left to actually enjoy what you spent so many years without.

Yep though might include 40 and 30.

I agree. Finding your first love at an advanced age has that "something's missing!" feel to it. At that age, you can't just cast off all seriousness of life and simply enjoy each other. Or go on crazy, off-the-wall adventures. Or try a dangerous hobby. Or dance in the city streets without looking weird. (Somehow, that's more socially acceptable in your 20's and 30's.) Basically, follow your passions without onlookers thinking it's "cute".

That said, a love partner may be of health benefit to people leading isolated lives, such as nursing home patients or elderly persons who outlived most of their families. But still, it's just not the same as experiencing love at an age when your main feelings are passion and vision for the future, rather than wistfulness and nostalgia for the past.

Lol- I don't know about this...
I think it becomes a moving goal posts issue- once you get a date then it will be something along the lines of: oh, well- when they get to know me they won't be able to stand me or something else along those lines....

Also this thread reminded me of the michele buble song by a similar name- but I actually like that song.

This is so true for me, too. I don't get why so many people who don't have their first relationship until their 30s or whatever then are OK marrying the first person they have a relationship with, not even having seen what's really out there. I feel that there's a great deal of importance to "checking" one's compatibility with a number of different people--it provides the perspective that allows one to determine what degree of compatibility is "worth it" to compromise for.

I think that's the main value of those teenage relationships, despite (I agree) the fact that they don't "mean" much. And I believe that for a lot of people who didn't date in their teen years, this is really just a proxy for "didn't socialize in their teen years", which is really the bigger issue. Someone who reaches adulthood never having shared emotionally with peers (even had a best friend) likely has a very undeveloped "relationship-self" or "emotional-sharing-self", even if his/her interests, other goals, etc., are developed. This leads to having only a vague, idealized idea of what it's even like to like someone.



I feel like I'm in that stage even at 30! Now I live with parents and haven't had a job/gone to school for several years due to health issues, but even when I was in a graduate program and passing exams with flying colors I still felt this way.

The kind of relationship I feel ready for and want--both in terms of what I can give and what I want to receive, is not what it seems nearly all "adults" want. They want someone either with stability or who is busy having lots of real-world adventures, and who has all parts of his/her identity already figured out. They can give a level of support and love that I can't, but what they can't reciprocate is the sense of newness--the feeling that just being with someone of the opposite sex is an adventure. They also don't have the unbridled imagination of a kid/adolescent, which is a very important thing for me in a partner.

No way, I'm in my 30s I've got aaaages of fun left in me! You only don't have much time at 30 if you are going to die at 35.

30 year olds don't act like 20 year olds. After 30 your not youthful, your bodies starting to decline, you'll have to work out more and more to maintain the same body shape. It's only down hill after 30. By 30 most women are in the serious settle down, have a family mode. No the fun fun, let loose screw the consequences fun like 20 year olds. I don't want kids until I've had that 20 year old relationship and fun.

It's easy for you as you already had it so now can have what 30 olds call fun. You'll never get what it's like to never had a teen age relationship, never had a 20s relationship. Sex drive also starts declining after 30

I don't think that once someone is 30 they stop having the fun that a teenager or someone in their 20s would have. I know people personally who are in past 30 years old who look like their in their early 30s or late 20s.

I'm almost 23 and am still a teenager in a lot of ways. Age is only a number. It's not a matter of once you're in your 30s you can't have the fun people in their teens in 20s. It's just a number.

^being youthful gets old, especially when people mistake you for a teen or younger when you're well over 21. I am 26 and my boyfriend is 31 I certainly would not say his health is taking any major turn for the worse...seems just as healthy as me. It would seem you have to be a little more conscious even past 25, like I cannot pass a bottle of rum around taking shots like I could when I was 19 without getting sick and I am more sensitive to what I eat or how much soda/energy drinks I am indulging in...but its not that horrific.

I really don't think one is starting to get that old until they're getting to be over 50...especially with the current typical lifespan. Of course aging can also be effected by genetics and environmental factors.

You are dead wrong, of course.

At 54, I might not have the physical abilities of a 20-year old, but I sure can behave like one. I know a few girls 30+ that can too.

Can do all of those easily (if I wanted to).

I was once I told that I looked sixteen when I was 22. Then someone guessed that I was thirteen when I was 20.

Yeah, I don't feel any different to when I was ten years younger. My body is in better shape, actually. And I have no plans to stop being silly and fun for a long time.

You can't paint all women with the same brush, Sly. Plenty of women older than you are not as you describe.

At 28 I already have back pains. All the 30 old women I met are very serious no fun. Having kids and being all motherly and such.

I've never had and so desire a relationship people had when they were 18-25 that's the mindset I'm in and do possibly why making lots of money doesn't concern me however women. Be all like gig gotta make good money so when I have kids in few years I can stay at home. Like even at 26-30 they thinking settle down, family, house etc. while I'm thinking go camp in woods and have fun etc

Also aspies seem to mature socially slower then nuts so while you and aspie lady might feel and act like a teenager, nt women on their 30s likely don't.