26 Mar 2018, 12:50 am
yellowtamarin wrote:
nick007 wrote:
The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
beady wrote:
when someone comes to you to share their sadness they are usually not looking for a solution. They are looking for someone to listen.
Having a place to unburden your soul can lighten the load just enough to get through the day.
Having a place to unburden your soul can lighten the load just enough to get through the day.
That's interesting, because generally when I share my sadness with someone, being offered a viable solution is the most desirable outcome. Having someone hear me out is all well and good but I want to put an end to my problems more than I want to just sit around and talk about them.
Yeah me too. But I know that what beady says is true for many people. It just doesn't make sense to me, though.
And in terms of here in the forum, if I just listen, that means I won't respond, as I'm only listening (or reading, in this case). So is that what they want, no reply? They won't know that I was listening so I don't think that would work.
I understand what you are saying. I'm sure some people actually want answers. My post was just one possible cause for what the OP was asking.
Also, what I mean by listening, especially in a forum, is that you do have to say something to let the sufferer know you care, it just may not have to be a solution. I think the reason why is because when a problem is long standing you have probably heard most every itiration of how to work it out.
From my own perspective, Ive realized what the solution may be for many of my issues, I've been told the same things countless times, but I am quite sure the way I am is not going to change much if at all.
For us posting and reading - It might help to know when someone just wants to know we are out here listening or if they want a solution. I don't know if that's a reasonable expectation.
The_Face_of_Boo
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26 Mar 2018, 1:18 am
