Online dating messages

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This probably has more to do with our unrealistic high standards. We have inhuman expectations and to many people “feel” with their gut rather then look at red flags like a rational human being. Good people will be authentic and will share their flaws right from the start, bad people will hide them, making the seem “perfect”. This plays right into the hands of a predator. Ever wonder why good people always fall for bad people?

Yeah, I was responding more to the others comparing the first date to an interview.

Never forget opposites do attract. Seen relationships in my past where one was very career-oriented and the other not even finished high school because of his problems but was very intelligent and did everything in the house and raised the kids. She worked and was not very good at those things, he was. Filling in what the other wasn't good at, they were a perfect math, amazing really.

So in the end, look further, give people a chance, people have a story and if they are nice, you never know. Too high standards can ruin a wonderful thing. And you can have A LOT in common with someone who is your opposite, it says nothing. But opinions vary of course. Just my view on the matter.

You might as well not date then. Financial situation matters a lot in relationships and it's very naive to deny that it does. Marriage always was financial institution. If you are not careful, you can marry into a large debt.

^ How's the World Cup ambiance there?

What World Cup? I don't know of any World Cup. There is no World Cup, stop saying nonsense!

**Patting on the back**

Va bene....va bene

Most people work jobs they hate , what common ground are you seeking?
I say I work retail , half would tell me directly that’s nit a real job and I’m undateable, other half just blocks me right after finding out my job, these are of course the few women who don’t list the requirements in their profile. Most women care about a mans income and job and won’t waste their time getting to know a man with a low paid job.
Don’t get why people here say it’s not true, women in wp have said they wouldn’t either and what self respecting woman would.

You could have lots in common, you may like all the same things, have all the same interests. Job doesn’t make the person it’s just a paycheck for most people. Why do women assume that job defines everyone?
I work at a hunting store, I don’t hunt. By that logic I must love hunting since I work at a hunting store.

By having things in common, I'm more referring to common goals and common life experiences. I may have things in common with a high school drop out - like we may like the same types of movies, the same types of TV shows - but our life values are going to be drastically different, and many people want a lot more out of life than just watching TV or movies.

Despite what others here might try to claim as though they know it as truth, this method of dating is not always the way it goes. I've had numerous people I've dated (male and female) tell me they found it much easier to be open with me than with most people. My dates tend to be deep and interesting from the beginning (unless the other person insists on following the "standard dating protocol" and shuts down my efforts to create a natural, equal, "real" space). Just because most people may never have had a date that doesn't play out like a job interview, doesn't mean it has to be that way.

And I can definitely tell the difference - I used to go on standard dates that played out like job interviews. Then I learned to do it my way, to relax and be myself, and it's so much easier and more rewarding now.

Good luck with that.

You know what I want out of life? To be happy and make someone else happy as well. If that means watching movies and TV, fantastic. I don't judge people for their achievements, job (no job) or income and for some reason the most decent people I met were people that had little money and the people with lots of money where awful biggots.

A multimillionaire man with his own jet offered me to live with him because I helped him through his suicidal period when everyone else left him to rot and I told him he doesn't owe me anything and that I don't care about his money. Multiple times offered to buy me very expensive things which were like buying coffee to him. Hell no! Am not one of those people. He told me he never met anyone like me, who kept saying no and he said I was a true saint. No such thing, just don't take advantage of people. Money changes you, seen it so many times. It just means nothing to me.

My grandma has money but she has vascular dementia and I keep and eye on her because her kids are playing with her mind. They want money from her and manipulate her constantly. Her caregiver is a really swell guy, his wife is severely disabled and he cares for her so that says a lot to me, he keeps check on the family when they visit as well. My aunt a while back lent some money and just told my grandma she gifted it, the caregiver was there and told me she lent it so I had to intervene and it's quite something experiencing that. How they lying and people being so evil for money. Stealing from your own mother in such a way, how sick is that? Even her cleaner stole money that was in a canister my grandma kept it in. Had to get that back as well.

My stepfathers family are on a trailer park, never felt that at home anywhere, they accepted me the way I was, still do even after my mother separated with him. Good people, loyal as all hell. Most did not have a job, no education at all and a record. But all had a story behind it which nobody listens to most of the time. I did.

Like the raven, most hate the bird but they are one of the few monogamous birds in existence and highly intelligent. Love them and feed them every day.

Well I did have good luck with it. I've been with the same partner for 15 years. We both valued education, being independent, traveling, etc. So we do have some of the same likes like TV shows and movies, but we are both gainfully employed which means we both can travel, we own our own home, have nice furniture, etc. We both decided that having children was not for us and we both are non-religious. These were the things that were important to us and maybe only us, but it works for us.

Like I said, if you meet someone whose values don't match yours, you don't have to date him/her. You're free to throw them back into the pond and keep looking for someone who does. That's what dating is about.

Nice! I'm happy for you

Your relationship is built on shared principals, family goals, views, interests and religious beliefs, that is what good relationships are built on, what Sly and I were explaining. Added is a good job, achievements and money. Take it away, and I hope you would still love him. If that is not the case, that is pretty extreme. If one gets sick or severely injured, loses their job, gets depressed or anything similar, I have a bad feeling of what might happen.

But it's none of my business and you don't have to defend yourself to me. End my side of the discussion here and wish you the best, we share a very different view and I respect yours and want to end on that note.

Have a nice day.

I guess you are a male, your view on romance is typical for the inexpeirenced hopless romantic male.

I will be going stereotypyical here, but like XFG mentioned before, males tend to be more “ideal” romantically and less practical than females. Young males tend to fantasize about this unconditional kind of love.

But when males start to date real females, and when they got dropped like hot potato at the first major financial hardship, they get shocked. They discover that their views on love between the two are so different.

That’s actually the main “theme” of Redpill, unlike what many think the redpill is not populated by lonely bitter males who can’t find dates, it’s not like L&D - but it is more populated by bitter ex-boyfriends and divorced husbands who got abandoned by their once partners due to financial hardships.
RP fellas believe strongly that the men’s definition of love is not at all the same as the women’s definition of love.

Your idealist lecture is something that I can relate to, as a male who had the same ideal views before, many males did, but I bet it would fall on deaf ears on most women, like Lulululuh whose views are very typically female (except the not wanting children part); I bet that her first thought about your post was “this is just an execuse to be a lazy TV couch potato”.

So yeah for someone who values independence and assets that much, she would probably abandon her 15 years partner if he ever loses his capacity to generate money forever - actually she may no longer feel attracted to him - I really doubt that she would use her own money to support him for the rest of life; just for the sake of “love”.

Yeah you're right, I probably would not, because the same rules apply for women who become disabled or ill; spouses are more likely to leave if one significantly changes and therefore changes the overall dynamics of the relationship. In fact, I believe it's actually the men who are more likely to leave a marriage (12%) as compared to women (3%) when the spouse is diagnosed with an illness or is disabled.

But like I said before, if you are the idealistic type and want an idealistic women, find one. They are out there. You're not required to date one who is practical and doesn't fit your own personal values. The responsibility is ultimately on you.

I wish people learned how to post statistics and scientific data.