Why is dating so difficult?

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22 Apr 2019, 12:25 pm

Just listen to the guy....and perhaps maybe distract him from the problem. Talk about something else other than "problems."

Guys don't like being made to "talk about it."

The_Face_of_Boo
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22 Apr 2019, 12:30 pm

hurtloam wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

hurtloam wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Why dating is so difficult?

Because people have lives going on outside of the dating and sometimes it's a struggle to keep the problems away from the date or to know whether to mention the problem or if lives can be merged regardless of problems.

But the problem may dissipate over time and maybe now is just not the right time to date. Maybe we wait a bit.

Who knows.

No.

Hit the iron while it's hot.

You're a bloke. What do I say to a man who is feeling sad? How can I help. I don't want to be annoying and in your face.

If you go on silent mode with him now then you'll lose any chance with him.

blackicmenace
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22 Apr 2019, 12:44 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

hurtloam wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

hurtloam wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Why dating is so difficult?

No.

Hit the iron while it's hot.

You're a bloke. What do I say to a man who is feeling sad? How can I help. I don't want to be annoying and in your face.

If you go on silent mode with him now then you'll lose any chance with him.

QFT
It will look like you're disinterested.

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hurtloam
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22 Apr 2019, 12:50 pm

We just had such an awful conversation over dinner. The mood was off. We could hardly think of anything to say, though we have spent loads of time together previously talking and talking and laughing.

I wonder if he does think I'm disinterested now. He was just so quiet I felt like he's lost interest. I felt like I was pulling teeth. Like I was being annoying just talking about this and that just to stop the silence. It was awkward!

kraftiekortie
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22 Apr 2019, 1:10 pm

Are you still with him now?

Perhaps you could play music? And talk about it?

Hollywood_Guy
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22 Apr 2019, 1:15 pm

hurtloam wrote:

No seriously, why?

It's one of the most natural things in our existence to find a mate. All animals do it and yet it's just so difficult.

How do people move forward from the casual to the relationship? How are they getting past awkward dates and moving on to something deeper?

Because modern society is so complex.

kraftiekortie
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22 Apr 2019, 1:16 pm

Society was always complex-----even during Cro-Magnon days.

hurtloam
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22 Apr 2019, 1:25 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:

Are you still with him now?

Perhaps you could play music? And talk about it?

No. We are not in the same room let alone building.

Music is a good idea though.

hurtloam
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22 Apr 2019, 1:45 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

hurtloam wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

hurtloam wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Why dating is so difficult?

No.

Hit the iron while it's hot.

You're a bloke. What do I say to a man who is feeling sad? How can I help. I don't want to be annoying and in your face.

If you go on silent mode with him now then you'll lose any chance with him.

Yes, but, man cave. What if he wants to be left alone for now. I actually care about him. I don't want to add stress.

blackicmenace
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22 Apr 2019, 2:07 pm

I guess it's hard to say without knowing the guy. I don't think it's unreasonable to ask how his day went to show him you're interested or something along that those lines. I wish I was an expert at this sort of thing to be helpful, alas I am not.

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Antrax
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22 Apr 2019, 2:07 pm

hurtloam wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

hurtloam wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

hurtloam wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Why dating is so difficult?

No.

Hit the iron while it's hot.

You're a bloke. What do I say to a man who is feeling sad? How can I help. I don't want to be annoying and in your face.

If you go on silent mode with him now then you'll lose any chance with him.

Yes, but, man cave. What if he wants to be left alone for now. I actually care about him. I don't want to add stress.

Even if he wants to be left alone, he'll probably appreciate being reached out too. I would reach out to him, but not push it.

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rdos
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22 Apr 2019, 2:14 pm

hurtloam wrote:

If he is ND, it's just good news. He relaxed and stopped talking all the time. :mrgreen:

The_Face_of_Boo
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22 Apr 2019, 2:22 pm

hurtloam wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

hurtloam wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

hurtloam wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

Why dating is so difficult?

No.

Hit the iron while it's hot.

You're a bloke. What do I say to a man who is feeling sad? How can I help. I don't want to be annoying and in your face.

If you go on silent mode with him now then you'll lose any chance with him.

Yes, but, man cave. What if he wants to be left alone for now. I actually care about him. I don't want to add stress.

Does he have a long beard?

hurtloam
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22 Apr 2019, 2:38 pm

Lol no. What an odd question Boo.

hurtloam
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22 Apr 2019, 3:56 pm

By the way guys, this is how women over think situations (am I allowed to say that?) This is how I know I'm definitely not male.

He's probably happy as a bunny, sitting with his feet up having a beer, not sad or worried at all...

blackicmenace
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22 Apr 2019, 4:03 pm

Perhaps, that all depends on how much confidence he has and how he perceives how things went along with his current interest level and what he is currently dealing with that's taking up his time. I don't know the guy, nor am I a typical guy so it's hard to say one way or another.

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