Advice Needed

Post Reply New Topic

I mean what should I do then? If I don't stop her she is going to drink till she passes out. If she keeps drinking like that her parents will find out. They will send her to rehab. that would help her but I don't wanna lose her. She got me through alot. :'( I can't lose her this time of year. Not like my last. I always need someone to keep me in check around this time.

Most people are drinking because they are unable to handle specific problems (anxiety, boredom, loneliness, to less sleep, unhappy relationship, unfulfilled wishes, sexuality, things that they don't forgive themself aso.)
Try to find out why she drinks. Don't become angry with her but help her to become more positive regarding her problems and to overcome her negativity about them this way. You can't control whether she drinks. She needs to stop that herself. She will only stop it if she overcomes her limited way of thinking about her specific problems.

I mean what should I do then? If I don't stop her she is going to drink till she passes out. If she keeps drinking like that her parents will find out. They will send her to rehab. that would help her but I don't wanna lose her. She got me through alot. :'( I can't lose her this time of year. Not like my last. I always need someone to keep me in check around this time.

:( This sucks
I need a cheat day (not not on her would never cheat on her [That was to clarify Pepe])

It's like the saying, You can lead a horse to water but you cant make him drink.

Both of are parents are homophobic:( I am going to move out soon. I want her to move in with me.

Military

I've known my former boyfriend for almost 13 years. We bonded over his 3 kids when they were little and I became their godmom. It was only this past March that he confessed his feelings to me. He'd fallen in love with me the day we first met but never said a word. I felt strongly connected to him as well but didn't act on it because I was in a relationship at the time. We'd just casually joke because we both have twisted minds. We began dating a week after he confessed this past April. There was tons of highs and lows because something seemed a bit off about how he handled life. He told me his oldest son was autistic which made me notice the similarities he shared with him. I found myself getting frustrated with how he handled situations.. I began doing tons of research and realized he had aspergers.. He was never diagnosed but fit every trait.. It made me understand a lot about him and also helped him learn why he always felt something was different about him.. Well we did okay for a few months.. He was going through a divorce from an abusive wife also...
Now the part I need help on..

While casually texting with him one night he said he was making home made eggrolls.. I made a sexual joke about it and was laughing when out of nowhere he sent a picture he had just taken of his future ex-wife naked in his bath tub.. I got upset and responded very negatively. He saw nothing wrong with it and said it wasn't what I thought it was.. She came by and asked to take a bath.. I broke up with him and we haven't really spoke in over a month..
Is that remotely normal for someone with AS? Did I overreact? It bothers me because I'm not sure if it was something he fully understood.. My ex-husband did the exact same thing years prior but he knew it was wrong and was just a jerk.. I'd told my boyfriend about it and he was disgusted when I told him. So I'm not understanding why he'd do it. He did try to cover his soon-to-be ex with an emoji but the mirrors behind the tub showed everything.. It's two problems om dealing with..
1. She was naked in his house when they are legally separated..
2. He took the picture...

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.. I do still love him dearly but that broke my heart...

:( This sucks
I need a cheat day (not not on her would never cheat on her [That was to clarify Pepe])

Failing to compute this.

Failing to compute this.

Let me help you. She has a new boy friend who is disgusted by naked women and she seems kind of angry at another guy who isn't. She says she loves the one who isn't disgusted and because she loves him dearly she left him for a month for him having fun with his naked ex in his bath again. Of course I can't tell whether she wants help for starting a threesome now or for causing him to send more pics ...

But because any advice is appreciated by her and I think she knows very well that his ex knew what she did and that he let her in because he's a guy and possibly not gay let me try this too.
Depending on her feelings she may suggest him
- to kick his ex for coming back
- a threesome with her
- a relationship with her friend who dislikes women
- to send more pics
I don't really see more options except of moving on and looking for a new friend.