What you NEED in a romantic partner, vs. what you WANT

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Needs

- To be Honest

It's the only thing I need...as a relationship, in my opinion, does not exist without honesty. Everything else is irrelevant.

Wants

- To be able to drive [as I can't!]
- To be open minded [which includes being understanding of my AS]
- To have some sort of income [If I end up living with the guy, I wouldn't want to be supporting them entirely...although if I were employed, I wouldn't mind helping them out if needed]
- To be calm [I don't like conflict]

What I NEED
-Male
-to be a TRUE Christian (open-minded, non-judgmental, etc)
-understanding
-accepts me for who I am
-shares my passion for anime
-intelligent
-mature
-trustworthy
-a good father/good with kids
-good sense of humor
-humble(not arrogant)
-I could go on, but let's just say that I want a guy who was like my dad

what I WANT
-to be an Aspie
-to be good looking/have a nice body
-etc

-Mist

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZFds_Db4OQc&feature=related[/youtube]

Henry Rollins: On Relationships

Exactly what I want.

Needs
-------
+Honesty
+Not boring
+No crazy emotional baggage which leads to relationship doom.
+Not trying to use emotional manipulation (which eventually kills all relationships)

Or maybe just this person...
[quote="Brittany2907"][/quote]

Needs:

- Respect me through my mathematical despair
- Honesty
- Open-minded, non-judgmental
- Has to have more mathematical ability than I have
- To be able to drive (as I can't)

Desires:

- A pretty girl with a smooth skin (i.e. friction coefficient < 0.1)
- Not too spendy/material

1. Must be 21-30 there are some acceptions
2. Must be loyal and honest
3. Must like music
4. Must let me do his portrait
5. Must have some confidence, oops is that a NT trait?
6. Must be patient with me, it's my first time.
7. Must have sum interests in arts to make an acception.
8. Must have a sense of humor

Other then that, he can be anyone. Kidding, I'm not that picky, I got a thing for nice guys.

There are some Aspies who are confident.

I fit all of that except #1 (I'm 20, although I consider my own "age range" to be 18-25)

That's good to know, I like confidence. For me, it's taken confidence just to type anything on this forum that's a little personal.

Thanks!

Well, there's an acception.

Just broke up with my girlfriend after almost 1 year. I remember she was quite pissed 'cause apparently it was the day before Valentine, which I didn't really think Or care about. It's just a day. Anyway, I just can't feel the love part at all anymore. I don't feel comfortable in a relationship, especially when it's a woman who needs constant affection and are more or less obsessed with me. And well, some people probably will think I'm an idiot for saying this, buut, it was too much damn sex. I don't like it, it's lame and I don't feel like I'm getting anything from it, and that girl wanted it like, 2-3 times a day sometimes. Heh.

Anyway, background done!

If I ever was to have another relationship, which I doubt since I've been jumping in and out of relationships for years, I've had so many girlfriends I can't even count them, she would have to be like me, well, as I've become.

No sexual interest.
She would have to like video games.
Talk about Interesting things, not feelings and the like, I don't understand it anyway.
Be able to leave me alone for weeks at a time.
A plus would also be if she smoked weed with me, heh.

Appearance doesn't matter.

I get random emails from people on this forum sometimes - one of them was from a late diagnosed guys (late thirties/early forties I think) who was making lots of money in the city and was obviously very very confident!! Just to reassure you that people with aspergers 'come in all flavours'

Yeah...I get what you mean. I think you'd have to share a few of the same major favorites, just not the exact same lists, you know?



Good points. I should add Honesty to my list, definitely, for now that I think about it I would absolutely need honesty. Not just honesty, though, but just generally being true to her word. Nothing ticks me off more than

I also gotta agree about driving and having a source of income--I don't see myself driving due to my severe sensory defensiveness and my deficit in spatial learning, and, being a writer, I'm not sure how secure my income will be in the future. DX Though, being a college student, I wouldn't expect anyone to have a current source of income...but rather to have a likely-steady career that would be one in the future.

Very well. My new list of needs (the wants be damned):
-She must be completely female and in my general age range
-She must like me like that (eventually love me, but real love takes a looong time in my opinion--it's not at the very start of a relationship)
-She must be compassionate
-She must be honest and true to her word
-She must be at least a little flexible
-She must be at least a little gothic, or at least able to appreciate gothic culture and artwork
-We must share common interests, and share a common GENERAL taste in music and film
-I must find her visually attractive
-She must NOT be: mean, slu*ty, violent, cold/apathetic, immature, racist, humorless, suicidal (suicidal in the past? I don't care as long as you're not still trying it), dishonest, overly religious, a smoker, or a sadist.

Quoth the Rolling Stones:
"You don't always get what you want, but if you try real hard sometimes you get what you need."

Do I know who my ideal woman is? Nope. But I have loads and loads of preferences, as many as the nest guy. I tend to think I won't know what I like until I see it. Attraction is illogical and utterly unscientific. It can't be quantified and sure as s*** can't be put in a bottle. What might attract a fetishist might make another fetishist yawn. Everything in Western culture deemed "sexy" is a fetish. Especially when the sex-appeal is directed away from the human body and towards inanimate objects like dresses, boots, cars, textiles.

Since I can't immediately know what I want in a woman, every detail must be assessed and weighed in order of presentation. Surprises can be both very good and very bad. Due to the nature of humankind, no one would be able to present me with an up-front gestalt of her entire being.

Love is one helluva ride!

Having a complete female is a definite MUST. I've had some unpleasantness with the hermaphroditic transsexual transgendered folks. Once I almost got into a fistfight with a person of indeterminate gender and confused identity.