Break News: Mccain's 17 years old secret mistress!

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its the attitudes like that, which is why a lot of you are sad and "nowhere" in life
life isn't easy
you gotta try
your not trying
your not gonna go nowhere
you can nay say my advise all you want
I could care less-its not my life, you want help I'll give you advise
if not I don't care

No one is denying that trying and retrying are essential.
No one is denying that confidence is essential
No one is denying that meeting a lot of people is essential.

But no one yet answered my question, don't you think that asking 2 to 3 girls out per month is a bit exaggerated? especially for any aspie? How come someone with a social ineptness disorder would even have a full active social life that allow him to meet that much new single people?

kilory, CL, Mr. makuranososhi , greenblue ....to all of you: how many social event you are attending per week and how many new people you are meeting per week , and how many girls you are asking per week?

Besides, there was not even ONE single female feedback in this thread. I would like to know the girls' opinion about the matter.
Girls, would you like guys who ask girls out left and right per week?

I read that 80% of people will refuse you when asked for a date, so that you must not feel bad from rejection and keep trying to find that 20%. They say to ladies that you have to kiss a lot of toads before you find a prince, which I guess is the same as asking lots of people on dates.

Saying that, I would not want someone to ask me out on a date, in filling his quota kind of way. I think most women would be able to tell that the chap just wanted any girl not specifically her. I think most women would want to be liked for themselves and asked out because the guy had a passion for her, not just because he was seeking a girlfriend or trying to get his 12 a week.

I think probably the answer is to stop worrying and when the persons right and the times right it will happen. Ive been single for 7 years and tried all sorts of things and nothing works. I have not tried asking out 12 guys a year though, I think I would probably get dates then but not necersarily with anyone I would want them with.

I think as well approaching 12 women a week/month/year will just get you a reputation as a creep.

I cite the current Iraq war.


I have more female friends than male friends, and I can say that the "friend zone" puts a big damper on anything like that. Personally I hate it, and I'm still looking for a woman that doesn't believe in it, but alas.


Speak for yourself. I don't see the ladies lining up to kiss me.
Or LPP for that matter either...


Or one of those jerk guys that brags way too much and is a borderline sadist...

Speak for yourself alone Mr.Toad , I am already a prince .

It depends on the guy , if the guy is super handsome confident and successful then his acceptance rate might be high as 80% while a super ugly jobless loser guy might have a rejection rate as 99% ....so it all depends on the guy's qualities.






I was wondering about Alex's girlfriend, is she his girlfriend now just because she's the one out of hundreds of girl who said 'yes' for a date? or because the girl has other qualities seeked by alex?

so Alex, ....??

But you're only a small prince

^^ :p you might be made of steel but you are still a .... ewww toad.

I went to a party this weekend, and last weekend I went out with some friends (girls).
I'm not asking girls out left and right since I'm not actively looking for a relationship right now. And I think someone that asked 2 or more girls a month would come out as creepy.

What I'd like to know is the way the rejected dude approached girls. Did he just ask girls out of the blue? Or did he try to build some rapport and then ask them out.

LPP: I run a store and teach music; I encounter people all the time, and always meet new people at the store. I spend time at the local coffee shop, and go to concerts and shows as I am able. I do not ask anyone out - I'm happily involved, thank you - but when I am single, I would say that I might ask 1-2 people a month... sometimes less, sometimes more. I don't think it is unreasonable who is meeting people to do this; it may be that there is the issue, that they are not meeting enough to make that practical... then you scale appropriately. When you're not making at least a few attempts a year, though... it's hard to gain experience, comfort, etc. So, looking at 12 a year, once a month... no, I don't think that is too much to ask - and it can be adjusted for each. It might be something small, asking someone at the bookstore if she'd like to have a cup of coffee and talk. Somehow as I re-read all this, I get the impression that there are likely some major differences between us in what we expect out of these invitations.

ToS - Being friends often is a long-term path, and there are no guarantees. Have you asked your female friends for their observations and advice? As your friends, they should be able to give you some objective feedback. For me, it helped - didn't follow every bit of advice, but things that seemed obvious once they said it... it made a difference. We don't see ourselves.


M.

The problem is that I can't feel any substantial attraction to women that I don't know. I'm actually nominally attracted to most of my female friends, although for almost all of them I consciously suppress that attraction, either because they previously rejected me or because I know a romantic relationship wouldn't work out as such...

To me, being a friend is almost a prerequisite to being romantically involved...

That is a tough predicament. You either choose to be alone, wait until you find someone whose methods match your own, or you expand your definitions somewhat. Asking someone out on a date isn't a commitment, and it isn't always romantic. I've asked people out that I was attracted to, and ended up becoming great friends. To my way of thinking, the cart is before the horse here - dating is how you get to know someone so you know whether they are friend or more.


M.

Where would you say the commitment in a relationship would start? I don't want to wait for marriage to commit myself to someone, since then it would be too late to change my mind... I would want ot make sure that such a commitment would work in the long term before I get married, and therefore avoid all those problems associated with divorce proceedings...

Goodness - there is part of the problem in communication. Dating is not the step prior to marriage in my book. You go on a date with someone, see if there is a spark of compatibility or attraction. This might go on for a few dates. Afterwards, two people might date exclusively, a stage before getting involved in a relationship - this might be as boyfriend/girlfriend, significant other, companion, partner, whatever terminology is used by the two - which then, over time, would lead to an engagement and subsequent marriage. Commitment is a discussion that two people who know and appreciate each other have when they want to move forward towards something more.


M.

No , you are just imagining and you are creating your own version of personality of LPP , when I ask a girl out I don't expect more than a small walk and coffee or going to some snack restaurant....at least for the first time. Do not put words in my mouth please even indirectly like you just did.

And oh ....not everyone runs his own business here.