I LOVE ASPIES!!

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100% True. Yet girls say they hate all those jerks and want "the nice guy".

Do they really say that? Do they really mean that when they say it? Listen to what they say, but believe what you see them do. Are all those women saying they want a nice guy because they feel guilty and feel bad about themselves for being attracted to the bad boy types?

If a woman marries a man who runs dogs over on purpose and gets away with it, she'll still be angry about this behavior, but part of this anger is likely directed at herself for being a bit turned on by it.

Not all the time. Usually women and men who behave in such a way come from dysfunctional families. I think women tend to internalize personal frustrations onto themselves while guys externalize them.

As for nice guys...I'm getting kind of sick of guys telling me what girls want as if they could actually get inside their heads. I don't find attributes such as that attractive at all and I know a couple of other women who are not married to guys who act big and bad.

I think too many times it's all too easy to vent frustrations onto other people as if they were the bad guys..even I do it. I'm not in a relationship and find it hard....does that mean all men are picky and conceited jerks? I don't know, but I've ran into a fair share of them...not because I was attracted either.

Anyway there's my two cents.

I hold no illusions about being able to get inside anyone's head. I do like to extrapolate a bit, and play devil's advocate sometimes. I'm trying to see things from different and unfamiliar points of view. Actually, things might be easier if I had a better idea what's really going on with other people, but I have to settle for reading things from the situation and from what I see people do. I don't really know anything for sure, so I have to settle for tentative models of what is most probable.

By the way, the story about running dogs over is real, but I am not telling who the people involved are. I can't make this stuff up.

Last edited by sgrannel on 22 Jan 2009, 4:08 am, edited 2 times in total.

well, the question didn't touched the issue about physical attraction, I mean, women may want those qualities from a man, but not without the physical attributes that she might consider to be attractive, they would look for both, those qualities plus the guy being attractive for them, and the question is, what if it happens that ones does not meet that specific criteria, for them?

This is relative though, I think it would depend on how much hurt a girl has been before, to care less about the physical appereance, if she hasn't, very likely that would be the case, from what I have seen.

A part from that, the appereance on behaviour, if we are talking about NT girls, and their ignorance about aspie issues, well, obviously they wouldn't much want someone who is socially awkward and the eye contact thing, and all that, which I would tend to agree to be somehow shallow, but some guys are shallow too, wether they are aspies or not.

And it's the same the other way around, a guy may have an ideal woman in his mind, with all the moral attributes and how a nice personality she must have, but, what about the physical attributes? Would he prefer a fairly attractive girl over a fairly overweight woman for example? if she happens to be an excellent person according to his criteria? As well as issues about health and even mental stability? I mean, I think someone would avoid a relationship with someone who may have issues about their personality, like clinical depression, bipolar, etc. when they notice that at first sight, unless this person is good at hiding it, then we may enter into social skills to trick the other person into believing something which is not, and perhaps in some cases might be the only way to get someone.