what women want

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Please elaborate on that one. I'm just not sure what that means.



Definitely an issue for me. My grooming is pretty good now, but I simply don't like the stuff that other guys are wearing. In the summer I tend to wear a plain or striped golf shirt, and khaki shorts (or plain jeans on a cool day, like today). And I don't have an earring/ear stud.



No longer issues for me.



This is still an issue to some extent, especially when it comes to girls. I have yet to ever tell a girl in person, looking into their eyes how much they are to me, or kiss them on the lips. I still have to get over the anxiety of either finding out they have a boyfriend (I have had some painful experiences in the past with that) or that they're not interested. I think the root of that is the fact that a girl that has any interest in me comes only once in a blue moon.



I haven't hit rock bottom, thank God. But I'm afraid of getting to that.



That has somewhat been the case for me. I consider myself a good-looking guy - I'm a bit on the overweight side, but quite a few women have told me I have a fabulous smile. Unfortunately social retardation has been of a great disadvantage.

Mordy's reply just came off sounding very nuero-racist. However I give him the benefit of a doubt so that maybe he can explain himself, but it did seem like he was making ALOT of generalizations... Yeah, aspies aren't very good socially, but I wish you had to live with it then you'd know what it's like. I mean I could go on all day trashing NT's but I don't because I'm not some nuero-racist biggot. I'm assuming your NT mordy, am I correct?

I'm beginning to like you more and more Paula. I reckon that men accuse women of playing games because we figure them out and they realise that they are not that clever after all (men hate being belittled you see and they HAVE to be the cleverest and they HAVE to be always right so proving them wrong is a real kick in the teeth) and cannot keep up the pretence. It is said that women are false and that they play games, well actually men do it far more often.

Also Enigmatic-Oddity, your posts are also worthy of bigging up

It's not being "neuro racist" you have to understand that women and men are programmed by evolution to find certain things attractive or unattractive. Women want to mate and have children with 'winners', not 'losers'. And by "winners" I mean guys that show value in that they are skillful and capable in many areas, esp social skills.

Why do you think all rich men have their pick of the women or always have a good looking wife? Women are attracte to: Status, power, and personability and social skills. You will not find a woman who desires a low status male, she will move on up if and when she can. All human beings have the instinct to survive

What this means is that:

-A guys financial status

-His health

-Social skills (i.e. social skills increase chances of health and wealth, they help IMMENSELY in surviving in todays society)

-His grooming habits

-His personality characteristics

All contribute to a woman's attraction for him and whether or not she'd select him as a mate.

Women do work on emotion and not logic, any woman will cheat on her boyfriend or husband if a guy can get her to the right emotional state. This is not to say guys are not emotional either, but you can't convince a woman to sleep with you with logic, you have to stimulate and rouse her emotions to be attractive. Women respond to looks, social ability, body language and social status.

Regarding playing games, sometimes men and women play harmless lightly teasing, light-hearted, joking, or playful games, and there is nothing wrong with this, and it can actually be a form of bonding.

Whereas it is playing manipulative games that is bad, and both men and women can be accused of this at times. I think it is unreasonable to claim that a particular gender plays manipulative games more often, and as far as I know, there is no evidence to support such a claim.

i.e. whether a person plays manipulative games depends on the psychology of the person, not their gender.

They want me

Lol, that explains it all! So the answer's been under our noses the whole time...

I agree with all of those except for financial status. Some women might use men for their money - I know one guy who had a girl use him to get into a concert and nothing else - but in the long run I find it's all personality.

There's hope after all, eh?

Women want me too.

Dead.

For the record.. when guys say "You feminists".. females won't listen and won't take them seriously. They will laugh at them.. why? Simply because they know that preaching, patronising and insulting women is NOT going to get a guy layed. Sexual frustration leads to contempt.. contempt is not a turn on. It's really a vicious cycle.

It's also kind of facsinating to me that someone can leacture women on abusive males yet talk down to them at the same time! Well mastered!

Indeed, I can't see how anyone who calls feminists 'man-haters' can really expect people to take them seriously on their views of what women want.

Basically Morty your saying us aspie men can't ever find a mate? We're doomed to grow old alone? Gee, what encouragement.

I think this is a brilliant post! Reading back through all of the the posts, there is *such* a split between male and female viewpoints. It shows that AS males have more in common with NT males than with AS females (and NT females must be in a differerent galaxy). As you say, an average women whether AS or NT, gets frequent attention from men, whereas the average man *never* has a women approach him in that manner! It appears that men are supposed to take an active role and women choose and ultimately have the veto.

Men are clearly meant to be as emotionally stunted as women accuse us of, otherwise how could we cope with the constant rejection and destruction of our self-esteem???! !! !

Surely "What men want" must come into it at some point? We have wants and needs, too. If we've been wired to behave a certain way when a beautiful women walks into the room, why should we be ashamed of it? Nature wired our brains this way and if the power of this attraction (and whatever attracts women to men) didn't work this way, our species would never get round to reproducing.

Plenty of NT men are also completely messed up about this as they view themselves as hard-working, sensible and 'nice'. Yet women won't touch them with a barge pole. The specific problem with AS men is that although we can make some improvements, we may never really get to learn the body language skills and rapid-fire social skills required to be truly comfortable in these situations.

Based on 2 very good male friends who have a knack at getting almost any women besotted with them, I think that women really want a man to be exactly that....a man. There's always the exception, but generally they don't want a New Age Feminist man, however much the espouse those ideals. The veneer of social conditioning is much thinner and closer to the surface than the deeper layers of fundamental attraction. Which is why they say they want a sensitive male, yet go off with the first caveman who grunts at them

And it's not just women's behaviour that's out-of-synch with their words. Men are the same in that we all say we want an intelligent women whose fun to be with, yet it's not the 'intelligent appearance' that turns all mens heads when someone walks into the room.

Basically what I'm saying is the whole ritual is ass backwards. Men and women fight about this kind of stuff, but really both sides need to admit to their bs and honestly try to eradicate the former ritual of socialising and dating, and make a new one... Though this would never happen.
Women don't hafta make the effort us men do, as they are the objective in the courting rituals... Men however, and society in general, should stop labelling women as sluts if they get alot of action, either that or condemn men as sluts too if a man sleeps around.. That kinda goes both ways.
Though I strongly wish women had to make just as much of an effort in approaching and attracting a man as we have to in order to approaching and attracting a woman. I mean when is the last time a man bribed a woman with his penis? He'd get slapped S**tless.