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Who REALLY deserves more pity?

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hale_bopp
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27 Nov 2010, 9:48 pm

ToadOfSteel wrote:
How many people tell you to suck it up? I'm pretty sure I never have...


They don't need to, I tell myself to and don't complain about it. Its a personal issue and its unlikely anyone here will be able to change it for me. There have been guys who i'm not interested in coming onto me in the past, but as thats a conscious decision I do not have the right to complain.



Mark198423
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27 Nov 2010, 9:55 pm

hale_bopp wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
How many people tell you to suck it up? I'm pretty sure I never have...


They don't need to, I tell myself to and don't complain about it. Its a personal issue and its unlikely anyone here will be able to change it for me. There have been guys who i'm not interested in coming onto me in the past, but as thats a conscious decision I do not have the right to complain.


But what's wrong with sucking it up in real life but venting a little frustration on here?



ToadOfSteel
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27 Nov 2010, 9:58 pm

Mark198423 wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
How many people tell you to suck it up? I'm pretty sure I never have...


They don't need to, I tell myself to and don't complain about it. Its a personal issue and its unlikely anyone here will be able to change it for me. There have been guys who i'm not interested in coming onto me in the past, but as thats a conscious decision I do not have the right to complain.


But what's wrong with sucking it up in real life but venting a little frustration on here?


That's what I tend to do... very few people in real life who know my face and my real name need to know that it is impossible for anyone to like me. It's impossible to keep a facade up forever though (only long enough to get through my day unhindered)... so I need the time here to compensate.



hale_bopp
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27 Nov 2010, 10:03 pm

Mark198423 wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
How many people tell you to suck it up? I'm pretty sure I never have...


They don't need to, I tell myself to and don't complain about it. Its a personal issue and its unlikely anyone here will be able to change it for me. There have been guys who i'm not interested in coming onto me in the past, but as thats a conscious decision I do not have the right to complain.


But what's wrong with sucking it up in real life but venting a little frustration on here?


Because people who actually want to help get frustrated that they aren't doing anything about it. Some of the same people have been doing it for years.



Mark198423
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27 Nov 2010, 10:07 pm

hale_bopp wrote:
Because people who actually want to help get frustrated that they aren't doing anything about it. Some of the same people have been doing it for years.


Well I've been doing it for the best part of a year I think but I've only recently realised I've been properly depressed and since begun to get a handle on it. I was in no position to do much really, I tryed to no avail. I'm sure there are others with similar problems too.



ToadOfSteel
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27 Nov 2010, 10:09 pm

That's where my "social paraplegic" comment comes in... I might be able to push myself beyond limits just to get around in life, but i'll never be able to just get up and run...

Then again, it's been said in this thread that comparing yourself to X when you haven't experienced X for yourself is just stupid...



techstepgenr8tion
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27 Nov 2010, 10:12 pm

I too get freaked out about the possibility of letting another sentient human being get that close to me, especially one who has been alive 28, 29, 30 years - who has the level of maturity that I'd want in a partner. Its not to say that nervousness over that is enough to prevent me from going forward, just that I understand that from time to time it would likely flash across my eyes and be apparent to the other person. Some people can roll that off, some find that unforgivable, I'd like to think that I have enough going for myself and can find someone who's life has been pointed in the right directions to where the things that I go through or have been through won't be a point of friction in the relationship. Its not that I even relive the bad times daily, but, once people get past my facade - that I went through them I think can be seen in my day to day thoughts and decision making, in small ways but ways that definitely would register for those who pride themselves on reading into people.



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28 Nov 2010, 2:37 pm

birdsandbugs wrote:
I noticed that on a lot of talk shows or popular magazines there are often many "sob stories" (no offense but most seem to be from women) of people who have all sorts of problems. These are things like "so and so cheated on me", "I was beaten", "I was raped", "my kid has cancer", "we almost lost our home", etc. Yet when you think about it, these are people who got involved in love lives and created families in the first place (which I will always beleive a lot of is through CHOICE). So my question is this: who truly deserves more pity? A person who has a problem as a result of having a sex life or a socially-challenged individual who has no sex life (and may or may not have other problems)? It always seems to me that this world caters to couples/families while loners like me often get overlooked. I don't know if it's because NTs think we're capable of anything on our own or they are afraid of us or think we're weird but pity and aid seem skewed to the more socially adept. Now I have many reason for being a loner but I AM lonely and get jealous of others that have social and sex lives. And yes pity sex or whatever would be awkward but I just wish people would look to the painful plight of the lonely for once. Am I wrong to think like this?


Is it just me or are people arguing with a complete troll here? Rofl.



Sallamandrina
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28 Nov 2010, 5:44 pm

@Grisha - it's nice to see you feel no need to apologise to hyperlexian after attacking her over your own mistake.


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Kilroy
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29 Nov 2010, 12:38 am

toad all you do is complain, everywhere on this site you go is complaining
and its all you've ever done
you never try to change, just wallow in self pity
like so many here do
they don't want to change-they want sympathy from everyone around them
and they undermind everyone by telling them they don't know what its like being in their situation, when so many do
and we just get tired of it after awhile
there is only so much someone can take of the same stuff over and over, and them completely ignoring advice over and over
people stop caring



CaptainTrips222
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30 Nov 2010, 12:24 pm

ToadOfSteel wrote:
That's where my "social paraplegic" comment comes in... I might be able to push myself beyond limits just to get around in life, but i'll never be able to just get up and run...



What a profound, sad, intelligent, beautiful way to put it. Very touching!