Following the Weight bandwagon.

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Actually, emotions can cause someone to be physically attractive- both men and women get married to people who aren't their physical "ideal" because their feelings for that person MAKE them attractive.

And I don't know how you'd "disallow" societal pressures to influence your preferences as far as physical aesthetic, unless you lived in a prison cell...with no TV, or books, or magazines...or interaction with other people who might talk about their preferences....yeah. Society's immense psychological impact on the individual is not a conscious choice. Throughout history, the preferable aesthetic has been determined by the dominant ruling class- sometimes it was fat and pale because those were characteristics of a life of leisure in a time where most people had to slave in the fields in a feudal system, and likewise, now it's thin and tanned, because both are associated with the means to buy healthy food and vacation, whereas most (in America) are struggling to afford housing, let alone healthy food, gym memberships, and hours tanning. Both of those ideals were propagated by dominant class through the time period's art, literature, and health professions. Nothing new.

There's no "hard-wiring" of preferences, or at least very little. Likely only those DIRECTLY related to fertility or virility. (Hip to waist ratio, for instance.) Societal aesthetic whims constantly evolve, sometimes radically, given a holistic view of human history.

I don't think objections to preferences are made on a personal basis.
As far as this issue, in my experience, they result from a simple observation-
that the majority of women in the United States are at least overweight, if not obese,
that the majority of men prefer thin ones, and many even refuse to date or marry other women,
and unless said paradigm changes, such choices mean tens of millions of men and women are going to end up alone.

I think it's always a problem for a society when a nearly-universal "personal preference", especially one that's not a preference but a REQUIREMENT for many,
is a characteristic that's quite uncommon in some places and impossible to find in others.

Last edited by Bethie on 28 Mar 2011, 4:21 am, edited 3 times in total.

What is with this recent epidemic of cowering behind the right to opinion?
"Blah, blah, blah, stereotype, bigotry, prejudice, but not ALL of them, and those are just my personal FEELINGS."

Yeah, sure. The fatties are indifferent to their health, that must be it.
And people with depression are melodramatic whiners.

Last edited by Bethie on 28 Mar 2011, 4:19 am, edited 4 times in total.

I see no "I'm bisexual and am indifferent to the weight of men and women I date" option.

Straying from heteronormativity complicates things.

I live to complicate matters.

Bingo.

The stereotype is that men care more about weight, women care more about height. How many women here would date a SHORT guy?

Me.

Because I'm only 5'3", and a guy who's too tall makes for uncomfortable kissing.

So, yes, I do care about height - but in the opposite way you imply!

This doesn't mean I discriminate - my ex was 6 foot tall! Only saying that, ideally, I prefer someone a bit closer to my eye level!

Last edited by all_white on 28 Mar 2011, 5:12 am, edited 1 time in total.

What's wrong with short guys? *confused*

A lot of straight women don't want to date guys shorter than them, because they like to feel petite/protected next to their boyfriend. Obviously not true for everyone, but it is a strong trend.

Of course shorter is relative. A 6 foot girl will think of a 5'9" guy as short, while someone like all_white will think of him as tall.

depends on the guy.
i'm only 5"6, so lots of guys just happen to be taller than me.

Yes, on average women are shorter anyway, so it mostly works out.

But tall women who seek even taller men, and short men who seek even shorter women, are left with fewer potential dates.

Umm... I'm female and I prefer average sized men. I'm not saying that being overweight or skinny is going to completely rule someone out, but I wouldn't say that I'm indifferent either.

you're too tall Em :p no i'm not too short

I've dated several. The best relationship of my life was with a shorter than average guy.

i'll make an exception for you.

What's funny is that's about the tallest guy I've dated.

I was thinking about it more, and got the feeling it'd be weird to date a guy close to my height-
but then I realized I was thinking more about someone being so close to eye level with me (yiiiiiikes)
so it's nothing specifically-related to men or dating in particular,
and if there's a short (I'm around 5') dude out there who can tolerate me, I'm all over it.

Last edited by Bethie on 28 Mar 2011, 7:24 am, edited 1 time in total.