Ever wonder if you'll find someone?

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Ann2011
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02 Jun 2014, 4:00 pm

marshall wrote:

Ann2011 wrote:

I don't agree with you that sex is shallow.

I mean initial knee-jerk sexual attraction is often shallow, as it's based on attributes other than the ability to emotionally connect. It also shuts people who aren't very sexual in nature out of rewarding relationships.
You're discounting the merits of mutual physical attraction. But having said that, I'm not sure why this shuts you out. You're as likely to find a relationship with someone whose interest matches yours as anyone is.

Quote:

It may not be your thing and that's fine, but that doesn't make it bad. At least not intrinsically. I know what you mean about some people engaging in shallow relationships to get sex, but it's not always that way.

No, it just makes life kind of miserable for me. It makes me some kind of deficient outsider that's not worthy of affection or emotional closeness because I don't have major sexual urges the way normal guys do.
Don't create false expectations and then blame yourself for not meeting them. You are what you are, embrace it.

DW_a_mom
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02 Jun 2014, 4:39 pm

marshall wrote:

I just want to say thank you (((((((((hugs back))))))))))). Sorry for getting snappy earlier. It's the same problem I've had with dating. I get snappy and mean whenever I feel misunderstood.

No worries. I know how not to be phased by that.

And someday you may find a date who will, too.

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klikmaus
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02 Jun 2014, 5:58 pm

AspergianMutantt wrote:

I used to have hopes, but with age and realizing I have all these other issues I didn't recognize or want to recognize before I finely allowed my self to give up. basically yes I can find someone but it never lasts and I go through so much rejection even finding one acceptance that its just not worth putting my self through it all. hell, i used to blame women for not wanting me but the truth of it is if I was a woman I wouldn't have wanted me either. and much of that was before, when I was much younger, I didn't understand and couldnt see what the world seen when they looked at me, and the more I realize thats wrong with me the more I realize I am just better off staying single. I just wish I could laid now and then but oh well.

Whats really sad, is that once in my heart I truly gave up, I became even more paranoid of people and even more of an isolationist.

A.M......

That's pretty much the revelation I've been facing myself recently. It seems that when one DOES find a relationship, it's not so much about the significant other caring so much for our personality but rather for the way we treat the other. It seems, in our unique aspieness... finding another compatible personality one MAY have to travel the world over to find that one other unique person. Hell, even in making just run-of-the-mill FRIENDS..... it's a damn near impossible task!
Being "better off single" is completely a matter of perspective. Loneliness CAN decrease the quality of your life, as well as your longevity as a byproduct of depression and stress.
From what I've seen, Europe is the place to have a quality life lived to full potential as opposed to the bass-ackwardness of things here in the U.S. (or maybe it's just an issue down here in the South). Most "qualified" professionals STILL haven't got a clue as to what Aspergers is or how to quantify it. This being considered, many go through life not even realizing that their perception is skewed from the mainstream. Those such as myself.... I was in my thirties before I came to the revelation that maybe I viewed things differently than those around me. Well..... I've ALWAYS KNOWN that I was "different", it was then that I discovered there was actually a clinical reasoning behind my eccentricities.

klikmaus
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02 Jun 2014, 6:41 pm

AspieOtaku wrote:

Ann2011 wrote:

AspieOtaku wrote:

Ann2011 wrote:

marshall wrote:

I'm sick of hearing antidepressants working for others. I'm on antidepressants. Been on them my whole life. I'm on the highest prescribed dose. I think I've been on the damn things for so many years my body no longer produces whatever I need to feel happy naturally.

Have you tried marijuana? It works wonders for my feelings of isolation.

As for the question, I guess I haven't given up on the idea although I find it unlikely.

Smoking marijuana alone isn't always fun I wish I could provide you company and we can both smoke marijuana together!

It can be fun to get high with someone else! You're in California, right? Lets say your place :wink:

Hope you like anime if not I got tons of funny movies like supertroopers, Harold and Kumar, South Park the Hangover and many many more! I can also provide some booze and munchies as well!

I moved back to Texas from Cali a few years back....... Man I wish we could have hung out back then for some blazin video nights! Dragonball Z is exponentially better when viewed through a cloud!

Ann2011
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02 Jun 2014, 6:56 pm

klikmaus wrote:

Most "qualified" professionals STILL haven't got a clue as to what Aspergers is or how to quantify it. This being considered, many go through life not even realizing that their perception is skewed from the mainstream. Those such as myself.... I was in my thirties before I came to the revelation that maybe I viewed things differently than those around me. Well..... I've ALWAYS KNOWN that I was "different", it was then that I discovered there was actually a clinical reasoning behind my eccentricities.

I experienced this revelation late in life as well. It has really helped me to be more patient with myself.
Btw, your dog is adorable!

sly279
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02 Jun 2014, 8:38 pm

marshall wrote:

Ann2011 wrote:

I don't agree with you that sex is shallow.

Quote:

better to be left out a relationship then be in one where the other person has way more urges then you . this could lead to stress and tension then cheating. do you mean physical attributes? I have found that I can be very sexually attracted to personality :oops:

just gotta find the one for you.

I feel like an outsider for my over active sex drive. I don't like having it and feel terrible for it.

marshall
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03 Jun 2014, 1:49 am

Ann2011 wrote:

marshall wrote:

Ann2011 wrote:

I don't agree with you that sex is shallow.

Actually it is EXTREMELY HARD, you ignorant b***h. Stop being so defensive. To be offended is petty and obnoxious. You're normal, just like 99.999999% of humanity. Be happy you're a normal person. Be happy you're not me. You will never get it. Don't be a petty little b***h and take offense. Sex is shallow. Deal with it. It feels good. So f*****g what.

Quote:

[/quote]
You don't get it and quite frankly are triggering me. Be glad you're f*****g normal like every f*****g other person. You don't understand pain. You will never know it. Now and leave me the f**k alone. You seriously make me want to kill myself. Just f**k off.

Last edited by marshall on 03 Jun 2014, 1:59 am, edited 1 time in total.

marshall
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03 Jun 2014, 1:56 am

sly279 wrote:

just gotta find the one for you.

I feel like an outsider for my over active sex drive. I don't like having it and feel terrible for it.

Don't pretend you're an outsider. You're not. Having an active sex drive is NORMAL. You cannot empathize so don't try to. You only insult me. Is that your goal?

Ann2011
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03 Jun 2014, 2:34 am

Well, I'm pretty far from normal and I never said it was easy. And I'm not feeling particularly defensive.
I actually know a couple of guys who are not interested in sex. They don't seem to be as bothered about it as you do.
I'm sorry you are feeling so crappy.

sly279
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03 Jun 2014, 3:36 pm

marshall wrote:

sly279 wrote:

just gotta find the one for you.

I feel like an outsider for my over active sex drive. I don't like having it and feel terrible for it.

Don't pretend you're an outsider. You're not. Having an active sex drive is NORMAL. You cannot empathize so don't try to. You only insult me. Is that your goal?

no insult and please don't tell me what I am or am not. while you may be an outsider for lack of sex drive the other extreme is having a over sex drive. while it is normal to have as sex drive most fall in the average area and dislike those who have over active ones. words like slut, nypmh, etc come to mind. finding a compatible match will be quite hard for me, and ending up with someone who finds my drive annoying and I feel not wanted by them would seem to cause stress and disfunction . There are times I wish I didn't have a sex drive

so maybe I can't empathize with you but nore you with me. Most people i've seen/read about online have average to low sex drive. most stuff about over active one are those people complaining about their partner.

not to mention it is irritating and causes problems when I want to try to get to know a lady and seem normal but then I get such urges about her. :'(

marshall
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03 Jun 2014, 3:49 pm

I apologize for stuff I said earlier in this thread last night. I wasn't in my right mind. I'm not going to read anymore or participate further however. It's just too touchy a subject for me so I'll leave it alone.

Ann2011
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03 Jun 2014, 5:16 pm

marshall wrote:

Water under the bridge.

AspergianMutantt
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03 Jun 2014, 5:55 pm

stop kissing womans ass, their just not worth it.

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equestriatola
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03 Jun 2014, 6:24 pm

To answer this thread's Q: Yes, but I am too shy to tell her.

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Ferrus91
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03 Jun 2014, 6:52 pm

sly279 wrote:

not to mention it is irritating and causes problems when I want to try to get to know a lady and seem normal but then I get such urges about her. :'(

Have you tried limiting your calorific intake? Eating little food in a day is an excellent way to diminish your sex drive.

hale_bopp
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03 Jun 2014, 7:13 pm

I doubt I'm smart enough or ambitious enough to ever be in a relationship that I would actually be happy in.

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