Multiple guys competing for one girl
I'm so lonely ='( I feel like a part of me is missing, I need someone to fill that thing that's been missing my entire life. We all want the things we've never had. All iv'e ever wanted my entire life is to find a girl to fill that void thats been missing in my life.
I fall for a girl I like very hard and it absolutely kills me inside if she doesn't like me back. ='(
Buy a flesh light, or save up $5,000 and buy a "real" sex doll. So, I haven't actually seen any real advice in this whole thread. When it comes to talking to women, you simple have to not care about rejection. I know that sounds hard, but it's the truth. Also, you need to learn to pickup on what women are attracted to you. I used to think women were just being nice, but thinking back on it there have been many times in college where I could have easily dated certain women. I'm currently talking to someone whom I've met in college. I was able to get her facebook, because I knew she liked me. I'm going to ask for her number in a few days and ask her out in person. I don't expect to get rejected, but if I do, oh well. Women will almost always give you hints that they like you, even if it's just subtle ones. This could be as simple as smiling at you everyday, or always asking how you're doing. Yes, they COULD just be being friendly, but there is also a strong possibility that they like you. If you ask them out and get rejected, so what? Are you going to go and die, because someone doesn't date you? Trust me, there is more important things to worry about than getting rejected. If you don't believe me, just put on the News.
I advised him to seek therapy for his very messed up ideas about women, which I meant in all seriousness.
Really, OP--get yourself some help. Things will never change for you (except for the worse) unless you learn to change your approach to women and relationships.
And me giving him advice won't help? I feel like you're trying to imply that my advice is useless. Maybe you're not though. I won't jump to concussions.
RetroGamer87
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Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,185
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Multiple Girls Competing For One Guy
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The days are long, but the years are short
I would seriously try to give up the porn.
If it's making you jealous and angry it can't be good for your wellbeing in any way.
I don't know if your last sentence refers to when you're watching porn or to girls irl. If it's the latter you must be creeping these girls out big time (I'm hoping you meant the porn).
I suspect that's because you don't have any self love to fall back on.
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It's like I'm sleepwalking
RetroGamer87
Veteran
Joined: 30 Jul 2013
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,185
Location: Adelaide, Australia
If it's making you jealous and angry it can't be good for your wellbeing in any way.
I don't know if your last sentence refers to when you're watching porn or to girls irl. If it's the latter you must be creeping these girls out big time (I'm hoping you meant the porn).
What if they're really attractive? The current runner of the girls vying for me is very plain looking. If I go with her I will envy the guy at the beach with the perfect beach babe, I will envy my half-brother with his much hotter girlfriend.
What if the sex they're probably having isn't the only thing I envy them for but also their increased social status? What if I envy them not so much for the sex they had but when they had it? They're sexually experienced and yet they're younger me! That fills me with rage and envy.
It casts a mirror at the mistakes I made in the past. Their success highlights my failures. They were girls that were interested in me when I was younger but due to extreme immaturity for my age I was unable to return their affections.
Should I first love myself before I get another girlfriend? How can I when my self-love is measured by my success with girls? Catch-22.
_________________
The days are long, but the years are short
How? That just leads to sexual frustration. If you're single, what choice do you have? You just have to discharge sometimes, or often depending on your hormones. It's asinine to choose being irritable, stressed and frustrated. If I don't get off from masturbation, or sex; I can not sleep, I can not focus and I am irritable.
I suspect that's because you don't have any self love to fall back on.
I think that is quite wrong. Quick, unreciprocated crushes are neurodiverse features, and have absolutely nothing to do with lack of self love. That being said, getting addicted to porn is not the solution for that problem.
No, it's addictive. Addictive things usually aren't good, and much less therapeutic.
Again what do you suggest? it seems I'm the only one here with high testosterone.
When I masturbate I use ordinary Youtube videos. I find porn with sexual intercourse highly disgusting. Especially when they include guys too. I mean, how could anybody enjoy to masturbate to some other guy having sexual intercourse with a hot woman? It's just incredibly disgusting.
No, it's addictive. Addictive things usually aren't good, and much less therapeutic.
Again what do you suggest? it seems I'm the only one here with high testosterone.
When I masturbate I use ordinary Youtube videos. I find porn with sexual intercourse highly disgusting. Especially when they include guys too. I mean, how could anybody enjoy to masturbate to some other guy having sexual intercourse with a hot woman? It's just incredibly disgusting.
So, because of your own sexuality you are trying to tell someone else not to look at porn; especially considering you masturbate? How is that ethical?
It's ethical because porn IS addictive, while masturbation isn't. Also, before the porn industry, horny guys couldn't use porn to masturbate to, so I don't think porn is like a requirement for release for the ordinary guy. In those times, having sexual intercourse was also kind of risky because there were no contraceptives. AFAIK, horny single guys survived back then without regular sexual intercourse and without porn, so I think they can do the same today. The needs that the porn industry fills are not basic human needs, rather they create addicted people that continue to use their services. Because that's how sex operates. The brain always wants the things that looks the most like real reproduction, but when this is not available it will adapt to whatever is available. Thus, for our own good, we've better stay at a lower level than porn.
It's ethical because porn IS addictive, while masturbation isn't. Also, before the porn industry, horny guys couldn't use porn to masturbate to, so I don't think porn is like a requirement for release for the ordinary guy. In those times, having sexual intercourse was also kind of risky because there were no contraceptives. AFAIK, horny single guys survived back then without regular sexual intercourse and without porn, so I think they can do the same today. The needs that the porn industry fills are not basic human needs, rather they create addicted people that continue to use their services. Because that's how sex operates. The brain always wants the things that looks the most like real reproduction, but when this is not available it will adapt to whatever is available. Thus, for our own good, we've better stay at a lower level than porn.
It is not ethical. That is your own subjective view. Pornography has been around for hundreds of years, modern pornography for decades. You are simply just criticizing people for watching it, simply because you find it "disgusting". To you those youtube videos serve as pornography. Pornography can be subjective, just like art. You are simply just failing to see the point.I'm not going to reply to you anymore, because I'm not going to waste anymore time. I hope the OP takes my advice and doesn't feel bad about himself for watching porn. I'm glad I called you out on your BS, for his sake.
No, porn hasn't been around for hundreds of years (at least not for typical males). That's pure BS. You also fail to address the point how porn is addictive and in fact diminishes the pleasure of real sex because real sex is typically not as advanced as porn.
So my view that sexual intercourse is disgusting might not be so relevant, but at least it's pretty functional in keeping me out of watching porn. Other people need other ways to avoid it, but it certainly is possible to avoid. Like I said, porn is not a basic human need, and so can (and should) be avoided. Especially people with addictive personalities (which is rather common for NDs) need to avoid porn.
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You are making false statements. The edo era in Japan made plenty of paintings depicting explicit sex acts. Basically, you cannot say it wasn't porn.

